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Just thought I'd throw this out there, but I'm near SA. If there's anything I can check on for you or anything like that let me know.
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Wellllllllllll...... for those who have said they're around SA,
I wouldn't mind knowing if there's a black pick up with a really ugly trailer sitting in her apartment parking lot <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />
I believe Niosgirl had a great suggestion to push OW into some river or gully....... <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />
If WH ended up with ADULTERER written all over his truck's windows, I wouldn't cry..... <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />
Or if pictures of his wife and kids all looking happy last week ended up on OW door..... <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />
Or if someone ran up to him, while with her, and said...."Oh my Gosh, WH, I can't believe I ran into you!! How is Paula? How about the kids? I bet you're so taken with that new baby of yours!! What did you name him again? [condescending look at OW] Are Paula and the kids with you? Is this the babysitter? Oh, gosh, I bet you don't remember me. I think I only met you once or twice. We met at the church. After breakfast. Remember. Please tell your wife I said hi. I guess I'll see you guys back in Washington in a few weeks when I'm back there. See you then! Tell your wife we should get together for coffee." <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />
No. I haven't thought about any of this. Uh-uh. Nope. Revenge. Me? nah. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />
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If you can settle down with a book and actually absorb what you read, with all this crap going on in your life, you are a truly remarkable woman. I can't get past a magazine these days.
My MIL is also an awesome woman and a true friend. She called me and asked me if I would consider giving my WH a chance. He had told her I wanted to separate, giving the impression I was not prepared to work on my marriage. It is the total opposite. Her son has done absolutely nothing to show remorse since he got found out and I gently put it to her that, in this case, actions speak louder than words. I asked for 3 simple things to try to get back some trust and none were complied with. The no. 1 requirement was that his mobile phone was left out for all to see. If she kept calling, we'd deal with it together. Last time I checked, all history was deleted and now he hides the phone. It was such a simple request and he couldn't do it. I can't move forward with this man unless I see some kind of sign that he is going to try and make me special again. Even then, I don't know if I can move forward but God, it is all so confusing. I know from all I have read here that NC is essential for recovery. I'm not prepared to share.
Yours is an intriguing tale. Keeps me coming back for more. I'm so sorry that you don't have the support of your own family in this. You've got a tough week ahead of you.
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FiM, It feels strange to finally post to you after having read so much of your story. But I wanted to drop you a quick note of encouragement.
While reading your post about your MIL it occurred to me that you sounded a little apologetic about the fact that you were giving your husband another week before filing. Please don’t. While this forum is a place to both give and receive opinions and advice, in the end the decisions are yours to make. Only you know what is in your heart and in your head. Only you can decide what is right in your situation.
I know that I have experienced, as I’m sure most here have, the feeling that I am constantly changing mind or second guessing myself. ‘Am I changing my mind because I have calmed down from our last confrontation and am now thinking clearly or am I changing my mind because I’m afraid of being alone/ scared of an uncertain future / etc.’ This is a perfectly normal reaction to having our lives turned upside down on a constant basis.
Anyway, I just wanted to say - keep you chin up. You are doing the best you can. And in your case that means you are doing VERY well. You are an amazing woman FiM and I admire you greatly, as many, many people here do.
-BS
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His mother knows him. He's really screwed up and running home to Mama because he has made a mess and is also no doubt hurting. I'd give him as much time as you feel is OK. What is a week?
By the way, I agree with the above, only you know what is best for you. My friends would have had me divorced. I'd do it for MIL. He probably could use the kick in the a@@, but I think his mom will take care of that.
Hopefully she'll make him an offer he can't refuse. Praying for you faith. You are an great person. I feel like I know you. He is a fool.
When he comes back he will have a whole lifetime to make it up to you.
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Do any of the SAT people here live near the San Antonio airport by chance?
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He he he.... I think the plot is thickening!
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FIM, uh, this is mom again...not dad! I am on my way up to SAT in about an hour...just as soon as my H gets home. I live 10 minutes from the airport! I live 15 minutes from the base. Which is near the airport! dumb city put the airport right smack in the middle of the darn city <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" /> Anyway, I will be near the airport all weekend. What do you need???
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*cheers mom on* GO MOM GO MOM!
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Dump her in the River, M23B! That water is NASTY!
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momto3boys - I tried to email you a few minutes ago but it came back.
OW is about 10 minutes from the airport to! I was wondering if I might ask you to swing by her apartment complex and let me know if the truck and trailer are there.
I'm dying to know. I assume yes, but would like confirmation of that.
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You know where Parliament is? (Street I think)
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And some pictures of his truck (or rather FIM's truck) parked there would be nice. Maybe they could be posted on the MB album. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" />
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On Mapquest, it is to the North of town.
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I have the exact address at home, but on mapquest when I did a search of apartment on Parliment I came up with a few within about 10 minutes of the airport. WH had said that's about the distance from her apartment to the airport and I do remember looking it up when I first found her address on mapquest and that's about the right place.
I'm pretty sure it's the Parliament Bend Apartments but have to check at home to be sure. That's about 118 & Parliament
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I guess I could log out as dad and log IN as mom...too much work though <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" /> parliment is on the north side of town someplace!!!
ARGH!!! Dad just called me! he said his OW had just pulled out in front of him as he was leaving the hospital! he called me to let me know that...Radical Honesty...you gotta love it <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />
ok, back to you FIM! my email addy is....ummmm, NOT WORKING for this site <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" /> OK, email me at...edit...quickly cuz I need to take this off the site! K? <small>[ October 21, 2004, 04:40 PM: Message edited by: dadto3boys ]</small>
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<small>[ October 21, 2004, 04:37 PM: Message edited by: Debbra ]</small>
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Ohhh...and the red lipstick writing of ADULTERER on the windshield while u r there Mom?? Make sure its the right truck <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> <small>[ October 21, 2004, 04:39 PM: Message edited by: Debbra ]</small>
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