M23B

When they tape the families in their homes when you can see a H and W's arguing or kids fighting are there camera men there or do they set up cameras and leave them there to capture 'real life'?

That is just something I wonder when I've watched Dr. Phil...like yesterday's show and thought that maybe you'd know.

Dr Phil seems very genuine. During the break he advised us more on being candid and that we were fine on stage. He is approachable and does his homework prior to the show. The ugliness is what it is, but hopefully like a turd baked out in the sun the smell will go away. See his countryboy wisdom is rubbing off on me. I think he will help us alot. I hope to appear a bit less dispicable in the future segments. I know I said all good things about my wife in my interview and none was shown. I think these excerpts will come out later.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by top rope:
<strong> MOM 2 3:

Are Either of you concerned about the "reaction" you may get here on the board??

(Yes, I know its a small concern.....but I am just curious how this may affect your comfort level with coming on here).

Especially since there is the possibility of DAD getting "crucified" by many (especially at the beginning...BEFORE the 2 of you start to really get to work on the M and your problems).
Thanks </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Dr Phil's website has it's own message board where the public discusses each show... and I expect ~that~ will be the forum where the most brutal criticism will be expressed by the viewing public.

Just hold on to each other Mom & Dad.

Pep

<small>[ October 15, 2004, 02:52 PM: Message edited by: Pepperband ]</small>

Well, I've never watched a single episode of Dr. Phil. Don't even know if they have it on DirecTV!!! (Shows you how much I watch television!). I'll look for it though.

Gads, I get knots in my stomach thinking about this. I consider myself a very strong person but I could never, ever, in a million years do what the two of you are doing on Dr. Phil. I admire your strength and hope it does wonders for you and others out there who find themselves in this infidelity wasteland.

~ Snow

When I was reading through the post and learned that XOW...yes mom and dad...XOW..the thought came to me that if she were to be there why not bf..not xbf..bf... If she, the XOW, decides again that she's coming, talk to Dr. Phil about including him.

I've just taken a full time job and will not be able to see the episode. Please post the exact dates so that I can tape them.

I am so proud of both of you for doing this. You're helping so many people. Please try to mention the Harleys. Their work helps so many people.

I especially proud of you dad...I know whatever crowd is there during taping, they'll give you a hard time (deservedly so-sorry but you know it's true). Take comfort in knowing that the suffering that both of you have endured was not wasted. Romans 8:28...

I wish you well, Mom and Dad..you're like FaithinMe, an inspiration. My heart breaks for FIM as her rollercoaster is heading downward...I'm hoping for it to head upward soon. You're a testimony that it's darkest before dawn.

One last thing..I remember the day when Mom posted that XOW..not OW..but XOW..was pregnant. I had a feeling then that something just wasn't right. I'm holding onto that feeling. I think this baby belongs to bf..not xbf..bf. The truth will tell....

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> have sort of a delicate question. Will any of your televised sessions include mentioning this site? Personally, I think a combo of Dr Phil and Harley c/b good but....my question is just so we can be aware in case there is an influx of visitors. Just a question for thought.

</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">No, we probably wont be mentioning this site or the fact we have counseled with the Harleys...so no need to worry about that...I can ask the producers though and see what they say about that!

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> When they tape the families in their homes when you can see a H and W's arguing or kids fighting are there camera men there or do they set up cameras and leave them there to capture 'real life'?

That is just something I wonder when I've watched Dr. Phil...like yesterday's show and thought that maybe you'd know.
</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">We have three cameras in our house right now. They are out of site out of mind. One is in the kitchen, one is in the Living room and the other is in the bedroom. When I turn the cameras on, we forget they are running cuz we have gotten so used to them. So it is all "real life". as real as you can get. There are some pretty ugly scenes in the footage too. One of them is when we are arguing about who started this [censored]!!! and they ahve to bleep it out! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" /> So, yes it is real life scenes.

We did have camera men come out last weekend so we could "reinact a lot of stuff! Dad coming and going a few times. Me pushing his car out of the garage...remember that one? Me chasing him down in the car...etc, etc...

You can tell when there are camera men and when it is "real life" as it is distorted a bit.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Dr Phil's website has it's own message board where the public discusses each show... and I expect ~that~ will be the forum where the most brutal criticism will be expressed by the viewing public.

Just hold on to each other Mom & Dad.

</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">At the end of the show Dr. Phil said "log on to Dr. Phil. com and give us your opinion on what Mom should do!!! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" /> ummm, I dont think I will be visiting that site after the show airs! I know people will tell me to leave the SOB, etc...I'll stay here where everyone "KNOWS" us and supports us <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

We are doing well...Each day dad tells me more and more how much he loves me and how sorry he is for what he has done. I am still sooooo scared, rightfully so...I have been burned and betrayed soooo many times...you see each time I thought we were in recovery, we never were! He was seeing her all along. He just hid it from me a little better! I am not sure why he even went thru the torment of "breaking it off with her"...only to be back into it hours or days later!

But, each day he makes me feel a little more secure and when I have my doubts he assures me it is ok. He understands my position and he is helping me get thru this. He cant keep his hands off of me <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> And he holds me all night long It is really nice!

We just got a new bed so it is so nice to have him sleep so close to me with his arms around me all night <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

<small>[ October 16, 2004, 08:15 PM: Message edited by: momto3boys ]</small>

Thanks for answering my question.

So glad to hear you are doing so well.

I am sure now you are learning the difference between a real recovery and all those false ones.

It feels lots different doesn't it?

Well, now you have some hindsight...you went through it enough times. I remember when you had one of your first false recoveries and you were quick to believe it was real. I had a few of mine too. The real thing is lots different. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by Trix:
<strong> The real thing is lots different. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Aint that the truth <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

I think when we first find out about our S A we want sooo badly to do whatever it is that we did to make this happen...well, by that time they are so far into the A that nothing can make the difference. At least for me anyway. When my WH told me he ended the first time, I believed him! I tried to hard to make it up to him, when HE should have been making it up to me! When I see people like FIM and others who are in that same state I want so badly to reach out to them.

This time around, WH IS making it up to me. Like I said, he is the one reassuring ME, Touching me, kissing me, loving me, holding me, telling me he loves me. I have finally started saying I love you to him again, but it is nice to hear it out of his mouth first! It really IS different this time around. THanks for your support!

Yes, that was pretty much my experience too.

He was much more actively involve in recovery and on board with radical honesty with no desire for privacy of any kind.

This is on today.