I hate to say it, but my H and I agree with Pepperband.

I also 100% support *whatever* decision you make, even if you should change your mind at the last minute. I do NOT have to agree with you to support what *you* feel is best for your family.

But I think you are doing the right thing (and especially with this being the second betrayal).

FiM,

Your financial situation is what has tipped the balance, it seems. I am a little unclear, though. Did the attorney say that only divorce would protect your assets? Or only separation would do that? I'd say go with whatever protects you and the children to the best degree.

Even though you have told him and told him and told him what will happen, I am betting Dork is in serious denial and he'll be catapaulted into sever shock when he returns home to find the locks changed and a For Sale sign out front.

But it is not like you didn't warn him.

I am so sorry he's put you through this. But don't question your efforts over the last few months to salvage your marriage. You gave it your best shot, an admirable shot, and he chose not to change. And keep in mind stories like MT3B. She went through what, nine months or sheer hell with dad's back-an-forth, lies and confusion. But Dad is home now and they are addressing the needs of the marriage and kids. That could have never happened had mom bailed earlier like so many were telling her to do.

Chin up. YOu have a good life waiting out there for you!

~ Snow

FIM-

I disagree with the majority here. I say do the full MB program. You are here so you might as well stick to it. Your WH is acting like they all do, nothing new there.

You are very early in all of this. I suggest that you do the whole program, and then you will have no doubts. I did it for 22 months, and am happy that I did. My WH and I did not get back together, but I know I did my best.

And doing the best that I could gave me peace.

I'm not saying that you should not protect yourself and your children financially. You must do that. Other than that, don't make decisions right now.

I am so mad at him for not realizing how wonderful you are. You have to do what you are doing to protect yourself. He knew what he was doing.

If the OW gets pregnant Faith will have protected her children. A mother needs to do that.

Faith-read Mimi1234's thread. She has a great success story.