OK
Firstly, congratulations on getting through a really hard weekend. I've been there and I know your weekend has been a succession of decisions whether to live or die.
Secondly your children love you, and need you to be a strong example of fatherhood to them.
Decorate your apartment, make it look like the home of a DAD not a DIVORCEE.
How DARE you consider that your children would be better off without you around ? They would only have the example of your WW and OM to serve as a reference. Its your DUTY to be a strong independent Dad whose life does not REVOLVE around visits rom your kids but whose life is FULL but you MAKE TIME to welcome your kids !
You don't feel like that today ? Well thats a pity because you have to do this for your children and yourself. No choice, sorry.
You must take back the permission you gave your WW to control your happiness. DOn;t waiut until you 'feel like it' ACTION it and the feelings will come.
I'm not advising from a bookk here Spinning it sfrom MY LIFE this WORKS.
You are a wholly worthy person who is loved and needed by your kids. Are you telling me that you do not love them enough to be what they need to to be? If I remember you had 'swinging' challenegs earlier in you M. Well, this is not the tim eto punish yourself for any contribution you feel you made to the M problems - you did not cause your WWs affair. You must forgive yourself.
Supporting my kids through their mothers affair insanity was the absolute MAKING of me. I never knew I could be such a great father and love them SO HARD !.
Sorry for the 2x4 spinning but teh self pity is NOT ok when your kids need you to a great example fo a strong and vital father.Do it and prove the b@stards you are a person to be reckoned with.
Also PLEASE see a friend you can trust and talk to them. There is NO shame between friends.
And PLEASE keep posting up here, we worry.
