I have just responded to the e-mai from WW, with a copy to SH. I feel that it was the right thing to do...time will tell.

I don't feel that I should copy and paste here, I hope you will all understand. However, there is a lot of pettiness ("he even has put toppers over his blinds"), but there are some more serious issues about her EN's not being met.

Again, there was no mention of OM in her e-mail. So I was very clear in again detailing the need for NC with OM.

I will summarize the response, if any, that I receive.

Georgia

Hi Ninja:

I think it's great that she sent the E-Mail,cc: Steve H. and you responded as such.

Don't forget to don your mask and cape and stay on the lookout for her! She's likely to be on your trail!

FGG, no problem. Consider it done and I'm gone.

Hopefully you won't mind if I continue to keep you and your wife in my prayers.

God bless you, comfort you, and continue to be your ever present help in times of trouble.

FGG,
I think you did really good in answering and ccing SH. Hopefully he will now give you some more feedback. I really admire how you have managed your situation, and follow your posts closely.
Can't give any advice because I am too new here.
Good luck!

GG,
So now your WW’s issues are all about unmet EN’s? Translation; your WW took the time to do a cursory study of the MB web site and found a concept nebulous enough to create a debate. Hummm, unmet EMs. Very interesting.

GG, I think you need to stay focused on the issues at hand and deal with this situation in total clarity. Meeting your WW ENs is of course a topic for discussion; even for negotiation! It’s just doesn’t happen to be a topic that has any relevance once one goes to Plan B. At that point, there is no discussion about ENs or anything else! By that time the discussion has long past.

By entering into any debate on this issue or any other, until the Plan B requirements are met, is counter productive to the strategy you’ve chosen to use. GG, the issue at hand is very simple and none to complicated. If your WW refuses to end her affair, then there is nothing to talk to her about. Nothing! There can’t be.

This is not about you wanting to be loving, caring or nice. This is now an issue of simple human dignity; your! Plan B does not call for no contact…well, except for maybe just a little, sometimes! It calls for total darkness. Anything less only prolongs the agony for both parties. You are not being kind by responding to her in any way while in Plan B. You are not!

Kindness is now about forcing her to understand and confront her new reality. Kindness is forcing the issue to confronted so that it can be resolved and brought to a speedy conclusion.

Coach

If I ever, ever get my hopes up again, I want everyone who reads my thread to hit me with everything they have. This is so very...well, I
don't even know what word to use.

Okay, while in pottery last night WW left a message on my phone inviting me to dinner. Made it clear that she was mad that I wasn't answering the phone. Then called back, left another message that she just remembered I'm in pottery class and couldn't answer. Obviously, I didn't respond.

This morning I have this long, angry e-mail back from her. Some brief snippets:

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">WW: OM and OMW wanted to move to the U.S. Because I was so friendly to them both they wanted to move where at least they would have a couple of friends. I see nothing wrong with offering to let a couple stay in our home (our upstairs is bigger than their entire apartment), while they search for jobs and places to live. Whatever happened to Christian love? </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> </font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> WW: "I stay in a constant state of confusion because what I hear you say does not seem to match your actions."

FGG: 4. If you will refer to the letter, I did indeed tell you that I was preparing to live my life without you if you continue your relationship with OM. To this date, you have chosen to continue that relationship.

WW: The letter? You mean the one I promptly disposed of? That was one of the most manipulating letters I have ever seen in my life. I wasn't the only one who saw it that way. Since you drug my brother into this thing as well, I read it to him. He thought it was manipulating and controlling as well. </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> </font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> wWW: Ok, you say you aren't coaching the kids on their actions, but have you done anything to encourage them to be there for me? You guys keep complaining I talk with OM, but who else has been here for me to talk with? Not any of you guys.
</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> </font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">FGG: As you are continually able to quote the current airfare to Vancouver, as well as your repeatedly stated desire to be there with OM, I didn't want all of our funds disappearing to go and support OM.

WW: This one actually made me laugh out loud! I don't know why you keep saying you don't want to support OM. #1 He doesn't want to be supported by you. #2 He has more money in his savings account than you have in your retirement plan, plus I'm sure he also has access to cash on his credit card. Why on earth would we be supporting them???
</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> </font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">WW: Regarding my children, they will eventually come around. I just pray nothing happens to me before that because they will never forgive themselves. Some day they will realize that their actions are wrong. I just hope it doesn't come about because their own children are treating them that way. This may be mainly my fault any way, because in trying to raise them to be Godly children, I did it the wrong way. I often pointed out other's errors when trying to teach them right from wrong. Unfortunately this only taught them to be judgmental which is what I am experiencing now. And I haven't attacked #1S and #1DIL. I have no idea where you are getting that. My children kept avoiding me, not answering my emails or returning my calls, so I quit trying. </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> </font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">FGG: I look forward to someday being a granddad to precious grandchildren. You know how much I love children, and how many times I have told you how much I look forward to this.

WW: Yeah, you love children now, although I was so shocked when I was ready to have children that you didn't want any. Perhaps if you had let me have that third child I wanted you wouldn't be having these problems now.

...

So go ahead, live your life. If you aren't interested enough to begin to even try to work on our relationship, I don't think it's worth my time.

P.S. I would like the two feather pillows on the guest bed that my mother made several years ago returned please.

Also, an itemized list of everything you took would be so helpful, then I can quit looking for things and thinking that I have misplaced them.
</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Again, there is no mention anywhere in her letter about even a HINT of even THINKING about ending her R with OM.

I know that some of you (Mimi) will strongly disagree....but I think this marriage is over, dead, done, kaput. It is very, very obvious to me that she will never end her R with OM because she hasn't even yet seen anything wrong with it. She's wanting me to "negotiate" and make consoling moves toward her to "win her back". All the while, I'm being assured that OM will still be very much a part of our M.

How many different ways can I say "NO WAY"??????

Today, I am "Disgusted in Georgia".

<small>[ February 16, 2005, 08:06 AM: Message edited by: Formerly G.G. ]</small>

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> ....but I think this marriage is over, dead, done, kaput.</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">GG -

IMHO, this is exactly how you need to 'feel' at this point. Being ready to move on will protect you from further damage so you can continue to heal. This will actually improve the chances of your M recovering. I know it sounds silly, but if I had not lived it myself...

As far as the 'inventory list' - I would only do what my lawyer said to do. He should control your actions with regards to property and assets.

GG, as always, JMHO.

Blessings...

Gib

Georgia:

I think there has been too much contact with her during the early stages of PLAN B.

I would not take her E-Mail seriously. It is continued fog-talk. Here, on the other side, I can tell the difference between "real" talk and "fog" talk. She is trying to justify continuation in her A.

I would try to TOTALLY disregard ALL of what she has to say at this point. I would not read her E-Mails, try to even block them. I don't know if you can do that.

Of course, I don't think the M is over. You are right about that. It's much too early for you to have expected her to end the R with the OM particularly with all of this contact. You haven't been able to be dark enough. She is not taking you or anyone else serious about this. She is so ENTITLED. She has been treated like such a princess.

So we are going to let her go away and try to get her needs met by CASANOVA . LOL!!! That's what we want her to do.

OH MY!!!

Edit:

BTW, You may also need to get a new cell phone # so that she can't leave messages. She is not getting the point here about NC with you. This is a power struggle which YOU MUST WIN!! She is crossing your boundaries......

<small>[ February 16, 2005, 09:15 AM: Message edited by: mimi1254 ]</small>

Georgia,

I'm sorry for your situation.

Have a good talk with OMW. Be sure to mention the hammer <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> .

The suggestion of getting OM and his W upstairs in your house was, I think, designed to pull you back "home" - to protect your turf.

If they come, (and I don't think they will) you can deal with it then. There's no reason to do anything now. (except talk to OMW).

I see it as purely manipulation.

Can you start the process for selling the house?

-AD

GG,

I think you should copy her e-mail and your e-mail response to SH; then ask him about Plan B while e-mailing. I'd be curious if he felt you should even exchange e-mails.

I honestly think from my POV that you should only be communicating with her through SH or your attorney.

She's not taking responsibility for her actions, there's no remorse, so to me there's not much to talk about.

What the status of your DV papers? Any idea of whether the financial division will leave her with a lesser quality of life than she desires?

I'm back to or still thinking that she sees no motivation to change until she has suffered negative consequences for her actions.

Would she need your financial support if OM/OMW came to live with her?

Also, please don't give her the pillows back. That will only empower her.

As usual, my disclaimer of not being Plan B savvy may discount my POV... I just don't like that you're at the receiving end of all these LBs. Really hurts your desire to save your marriage, should she ever wake-up I'm sure.

Good Afternoon All -

I think this e-mail today really lets me know that a breakthough is not at hand. I know, fog talk and all that, but the point is that the fog isn't even beginning to clear. I keep going through this torturous cycle of "maybe she's about ready", and each time it just seems like it's a new opportuntiy for her to dash me into the rocks with renewed vigor.

I know what you're all saying about hitting the bottome, etc. But...you should see what she looks like. I mean, it is hard to describe her appearance. Dark bags under her eyes, eyes sunken back into her head, looks like she's lost a lot of weight, etc. She really does look like a drug addict, seriously. I'm not sure the pit she's in has a bottom in it that will stop her.

I have instructed the attorney to continue with the divorce proceedings. He has suggested that the 30-day hearing (which he says is never 30 days) will probably be around the first part of April. I don't know how long until she is served with the papers.

I'm going to see if the company will give me a different cell #. She hasn't called me any on my personal one, so I assume she doesn't have it.

As far as financial issues, I suppose that will be up to a judge to award fair alimony. My attorney tells me he would expect about 3 years of alimony to allow her to finish her degree (she's got 3 years of college), then that would be it. I've told him that I will readily agree to a 50/50 split of assets.

There is certainly no way that she will continue her standard of living after we divorce. I was quite surprised to hear that OM has more money than I, perhaps he has a wealthy family in Iran and that is the reason that he doesn't work. That doesn't explain why OMW works in a coffee shop and they live in a small apartment. I don't know how her life will be impacted (financially) if OM and/or OMW comes to live with her.

This e-mail today will be forwarded to my attorney and I will respond to no more of her communications, even if SH is cc'd.

This is ridiculous. How do you respond to this sort of statement?

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">And yes FGG, the problems started because of your jealousy with the end result that #1OM and I started communicating on a deeper level </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">I feel like I must have "KICK ME" written on my pants.

Dark, dark...Ninja Georgia

GG,
You're feeling tired and disgusted because of the things she continues to say? Well huess what GG, that's why you're not suppose to be hearing them! Don't you get it yet? This a large part of what Plan B is all about!

Why are you debating non issues with your WW? Why would you even dignify her foggy groggy stupidity by responding?

Every time you give into her by interacting or engaging with her in any way, you prevent the process from going forward. Just stop communicating with her! Instead send her one last message.

"WW do not contact me ever again, in any way, for any reason unless it is to tell me that you will finally agree to never have any communication with the OM ever again!"

And that is it. No more contact. Move on. After that it's in the hands of God where it all belongs.

coach

I think it's time you talk with WW's brother and expose the A to him...let him hear YOUR side of the story. She can tell you ANYTHING about what her brother said, and through her fog filter it will sound like what she wants to hear. If this is the only man (other than OM) she is listening to, it's time to fill him in on the details...let him know what she is capable of doing, what the situation is. You will probably find you have an ally in him...

And when was the last time you talked with OMW? It is probably time to contact her again and fill her in on the details of your M. She probably has no clue what is going on...

Here's the thing GG....everytime your wife is able to engage you in any way while she is still in contact with the OM, it raises the hope that she can somehow convince you to allow her to continue to have you both on her own terms. What ever must be done....blocks, number changes, etc...to make sure that she cannot continue to suck you back into her chaos must be done. Contact undoes all the benefits of Plan B and leaves you with the hopelessness that you are feeling.....I'm sorry that's where you are.

My dear friend, FGG:

Sorry I haven't been around to check on you and respond over these last few days.

I don't have much to add in the limited amount of time that I have on my break from my class that I'm taking (have been in class all week), but I want to leave you with a couple of things...

We care about you and love you...

No one ever does this perfectly (Plan B, that is)

We cannot expect alien/addicted people to respect us or our boundaries when we keep moving them around.

Your actions and your words are not totally matching to your WS's ears and eyes. By the act of you continuing to engage her, you ARE prolonging her suffering which I KNOW is the last thing you want to do right now! You cannot continue to engage her, invite her in..or whatever...unless it is something that firmly merits such a thing. We know that her suffering is a consquence of her actions, but I want you to know that by waffling, you are dragging it out for the both of you.

My friend, your heart is your own worst enemy right now outside of your wife's A. Don't let your 'feelings' rule you as they are ruling your wife.

She will ALWAYS, ALWAYS, ALWAYS hit you where it hits the hardest and make you question everything, make you feel guilty, make you angry...or to sink into a feeling of hopelessness about the M. This IS her goal. Any reaction is a 'score' for her. Remember, this is not the W you married - do NOT confuse the two.

Personally, I would not have responded to her email in any way, but perhaps..as you alluded..there were reasons to...?? Still - dark is dark. Sounds like her emails were more fog gunk. NEVER EVER respond to those. How can she miss you and what EN's you were meeting if she can always get you to engage with her one way or another or she can divert the guilt and doubt building up inside of her with a strike out at you by blameshifting?

If it wasn't a total LB, I would consider placing a restraining order on her. Also, what are your thoughts on contacting SH anyways to tell him where you are 'at' these days..just because he hasn't contacted you...that doesn't mean it isn't time to contact him again. I can almost promise you that she is probably telling SH a whole diff story, so without your input..well, you see where I'm going.

If I missed any discussion that you have talked to SH or had a diff reason why you weren't...I am truly sorry. Just wanted to squeeze in a reply to you while I could and had to read fast, fast, fast.

FGG - nothing in this post is intended to make you feel worse...I just want her to quit having so many opportunities to hurt you more than she already has.

Warm Regards,

FYR

GG,

I'm probably going to be bashed for this, but I think you should proceed according to plan, and get on with your life.

3 years alimony and 50/50 split sounds decent to me for what you've been through. Personally, I think everything that needs to be said by you to your wife HAS already been said...time to move on with your life....I think you've earned it!!

The loss is HERS! You are not the bad guy here.

Thanks to all of you for your candid comments today.

This has really been a rollercoaster ride, one which I sure many of you have also experienced. I'm looking forward to a little bit of peace tonight and Bible study at church (dinner is fried chicken)!!

Good Night to all -

Ninja Georgia

Ninja Georgia,
I have been following your thread very closely. I am MD and although not in the pschiatry field I have always been very interested in the way the mind works. Lately, since we have been able to hear more from your WW I am worrying that she may really be having psychiatric problems and the A is just a symptom. Sometimes it is very difficult to tell.
I don't really know what to recommend because I am sure she would refuse to see a psychiatrist. So you would need to have her assessed without her knowing, which means that someone has to get near her and lead her. From what we've heard from you she isn't close to her sons or DILs, but does she have any other family close or friends?

A few years ago the mother of a frined of my daughters turned up at my house at 9 pm with her 4 yr old. I knew her from school and birthday parties but we weren't friends. Anyway she told me she had been wandering since 9 am with the child because she wanted to divorce her husband. We talked and I tried to get her to call someone in her family but she kept saying they were all horrible people including her mother who I had seen at schoolmany times. Finally she agreed to call her brother and they came to pick her up and it turned out that she was hallucinating. She was treated and has been fine for about 11 years now. She obviously didn't divorce and all the terrible things she said about her husband and mother were probably not true. I never told them what she had said.

So sometimes when people aren't mentally well it is hard to tell. In this case we could be confusing the "fog" with something else.

Maybe this isn't any help, but I couldn't help feeling that there may be another explanation for your wife's behaviour, that cannot be explained by a WW situation.

I repeat, I'm not a specialist in this area but I've seen several cases and know that these people are sick and can be helped. I feel very frustrated when others don't realize that they are sick and therefore everything they say is delusional.

You don't have to even answer me if you don';t think this is any help. I understand, but I felt I had to tell you. You know her better and you've seen her behaviour. Do what you think best, because so far I think you do great.

GG,

CC46 may be right, but I think you WW has plenty of perfectly rational and functioning brain cells yet.

She responded to losing her car by resourcefully finding the car dealing and trying to get it back.

She found your pottery class and found you there.

She found your new apartment and talking her way in - talked you into letting her take the dog.

She got the locks changed ASAP when she wanted to keep you out.

These are not consistent with a person who is "out of it". I think she is a very proud lady, accustomed to getting her way, who is addicted to a relationship with OM.

-AD

Georgia Guy, though it falls on deaf ears, I really do care about you and your wife. So, having read this latest justification, I am prompted to attempt one last parting plea. Georgia, you are my brother in Christ and I can do no less than plead for Christ in your actions and decisions. "For better or for worse....until DEATH do us part." YOUR covenant with God and your wife. I can't talk to your wife, as much as I'd like to, so I am left with pleading with you.

I read and read and read your posts and I keep hearing "self, self, self." What can "Georgia do," what your wife "does or doesn't do," but precious little about simply letting God work and being His "tool" in your marriage. Georgia, you are God's appointed "tool" in your marriage. Running away, ala Jonah, is not the answer. Does dealing with all this hurt? Of course. God knows that. That's also why He has said and promised that you "can do all things THROUGH Christ who gives me (you) strength."

Georgia, the two of you are behaving like unbelievers and it's very sad. You both are digging in your heels, refusing to simply be obedient to God no matter how you might be feeling or how "justly" wronged you might be.

In short, neither one of you is listening to God. Perhaps I can "cut your wife some slack" on that issue because she is trapped in her "crusade" to save a Muslim and the fog that is surrounding her. You....I'm guessing it's just the overwhelming nature of the emotions, the pain, the fear of the future, all the negative impacts of a wife placing someone or something "ahead" of you. I understand that sort of thing all too well. Several times I have faced the demon of "throw in the towel, it's not happening fast enough and I'm not sure it will ever happen."

Georgia Guy....did you hear the plea....the same plea that I have been asking you and that you have been ignoring?

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">wWW: Ok, you say you aren't coaching the kids on their actions, but have you done anything to encourage them to be there for me? You guys keep complaining I talk with OM, but who else has been here for me to talk with? Not any of you guys. </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Georgia Guy, God HATES divorce. God does NOT move according to your schedule or my schedule. God says to WAIT on Him and simply follow Him in obedience as you wait. Sometimes we simply ENDURE. Georgia, just how patient and enduring do you think Jesus Christ was for HIS adulterous bride? Shall any of us do less?

What God has joined together let NOT man separate.

Georgia, "Plan B" has it's place at certain times. But you have rendered "Plan B" impotent and irrelevant. Now all "Plan B" is a manipulative tool and a punishment, to be followed by the ultimate punishment...Divorce.

You cannot reestablish "Plan B" anymore than you can put a broken egg back together. You cannot achieve anything without communication and this "mantra" of yours, "refer back to my letter" is childish.

The foregoing has been my OPINION. YOU choose. But I submit you are too close to the trees to see the forest or where the path you are on is going to lead. Georgia, you are her HUSBAND. You are supposed to be her spiritual head. You are supposed to "stand in" for Christ in your marriage. You are supposed to be "shepard" who leaves his own security behind and goes in search of his treasured ewe that has gotten lost.

I hope for the best for you and your marriage. But I see two people digging in their selfish heels and refusing to even talk. Each justfying there obtuse behavior because it "feels right" them. Emotion over love and logic. Rationalizaton over obedience.

"There is still hope. The Bible also insists upon love even at what for you would be the lowest level. God commands: 'Love your enemies.' You see, there is no way out. You must learn to love each other; God commands it." (What Do You Do When Your Marriage Goes Sour, by Jay E.Adams)

"What is Peter telling us about the “now,” and what does it mean for our marriages?
He’s telling us that “now” is about something much deeper than getting up in the morning with a smile, or romantic weekends, or fulfilling intimacy.
Peter is teaching us that God is willing to compromise these seemingly essential aspects of marriage in order to produce something greater, fuller, and deeper in our lives: genuine faith.
This is what God is after in the midst of those painful experiences that cause us to wonder if he really loves us and hears our prayers; the times when we find ourselves envying other believers and even those who don’t yet know the Lord.
Such troubling experiences are sent our way because God is not done with us yet.
In the midst of trial, he is giving us the goal of our faith: the salvation of our souls. And what we need to learn to say in response is not “God, why me?” but “God, thank You. Give me more. I want everything that You know I need. I realize now that the struggle of this moment is not a mistake after all. It’s an act of Your perfect, redemptive love.”
This sort of response does not come naturally to us; it runs counter to what lies deep in our hearts as sinners. What we wish is not only that life would be easy, but that it would be a resort.
The greatest marketing concept in Western culture right now is the all-inclusive resort. You pay your money and get whatever you want, whenever you want it. Someone explained one of these deals to me by saying they include “twelve stated meals a day.” He said, “The last meal is at midnight, but at 2:00 A.M. you can order pizza in your room if you want.” Sounds like fun to me. No one can say no to you! At any moment, you can decide to do whatever you want.
If God wanted life to be a resort, this is what it would be like. But we need to look at our lives in the here and now with different eyes, and see that God has placed each one of us in the resort of his choosing!
The blessings that God gives you in your family, in the husband and wife relationship, in your physical life, are meant to point to a deeper and fuller blessing: the actual presence of the Lord Jesus Christ in your life. He is life abundant---not your husband or wife, your house, or your children. Jesus Christ is ours, and we are his." (Marriage Whose Dream?, by Paul David Tripp)

"In John 6, Jesus says, “I am the bread of life.” We need to ask ourselves, “what kind of bread do I really hunger for? What kind of bread do I really want to feed on?”
Now, I’m not saying that we shouldn’t seek to improve our marriages and families. But I think that we can miss the point. We can be like the people who pursued Jesus, wanting him only insofar as he was able to keep their stomachs full.
Are you coming to Jesus because you’re holding onto your dream and you hope that somehow, some way, Jesus will help you get it? If that’s all you want from him, then you’re going to be miserably disappointed if your dreams don’t come true. If you are living for earthly bread, and that’s the source of life, you’re in big trouble when you don’t receive it.
But if you’re living for spiritual bread, for a deeper communion with the Lord Jesus Christ, then your marriage relationship becomes a wonderful place to live that out.
When two people are committed to Christ and long to know him better, more fully, and more deeply, they will experience unity and intimacy that unbelievers cannot know. Their lives will be transformed into expressions of praise and worship and glory to him.
Only by getting their own selves out of the way is it possible for them to know unity in the Spirit as children of the Lord Jesus Christ. And so a more satisfying unity as husband and wife will follow.
People whose eyes are just on the physical bread will end up devouring each other because the physical bread alone cannot ever satisfy. You will be a parasite on your mate, sucking his or her blood: but he or she will never, ever, give you enough.
There’s only one Bread---it’s Jesus. And life is found in feeding on him by faith.
Do you know what happened when Jesus proclaimed that message---when he said that unless you eat his bread and drink his blood, you won’t enter the kingdom of heaven (John 6:53-59)? Not only did the crowd forsake him, but Scripture says that many of his disciples left as well (v. 66). They basically said, “Lord, this is a hard teaching.”
And it is, isn’t it?" (Marriage Whose Dream?, by Paul David Tripp)

Georgia Guy, my prayers are continuing for you and your wife, that God will work HIS will in both of your lives.

Georgia, God allows divorce for sexual immorality if the unfaithful spouse is unrepentant and if you harden your heart. But it is the absolute LAST resort. Have you endured enough to make your present course for divorce the "last" resort?

How long will you wait? How long is "too long?"

God bless.