Welp, I reckon I belong here tonight... almost midnight and I just ate an ice cream cone.

Maybe I should have a quick beer before bed...

Kiwi, you can't throw a rock without hitting adultery, can you? I've bumped into a few people now who, upon hearing about my situation, have said things like, "Yeah, me too, 20 years ago. Oh god was that horrible. I'm so sorry."

Mmmmm, Summit Extra Pale. Pffffffft!

GC

Hey GC, good to see you back here.

Not many people around Iditoville tonight.

And where's Jelly and ST?

And LINY and Bob my other nightshifers.

Jen

<small>[ November 16, 2004, 12:03 AM: Message edited by: KiwiJ. ]</small>

Hey Jen & GC ! I'm just setting out for another exhilarating 2 hour drive to London for two days of booooooooooooooooooooooring meetings.

I GOTTA find me another job !

Trouble is I'm paid too well and too secure to do anyting rash.

Just waiting for the painkillers to work on this headache and I'll set out on this frosty, dark morning.

Bob, I got the most daaahling ballet slippers. LOL.

Your what the BS feels thread was fantastic. I thought CJ's response was wonderful. I thought I might even add to it about what the WS goes through at the same time the BS is going through all their stuff.

Gosh, if I hadn't had a couple of wines (NZ's best) I'd do it now. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

GC, you are doing SO much better than you were.

Jen

Thanks, Jen. Letting go of an attachment like this, even when you decide you need to, takes a while.

Bob, I need a secure, high-paying job. Mine is secure but the pay is not great. Not bad, but not enough for me to keep my house without taking some steps.

Maybe I should join a cover band. They make tons of money. The rest of us losers with our own songs just get ignored and have to play weeknight gigs for next to nothing and go to work the morning after. Boo hoo hoo hoo hoo!

GC

Don't you find you can't walk or dance in ballet pumps for long tho' jen ? ( I did fancy dress once so I know !! ) <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

I would LOVE to see an 'academic' description of what a WS feels at the same time as a BS. I think WS or BS you have to examine your hurt an then you can empathise for the 'other spouse' hurt too.

I know you know this but don;t write that stuf lightly, Jen. It nearly broke my heart writing that piece. Tears dripping off my chin. Took a day or so to get over fully.

And yes, Squid and I are doing great. Shes SO hurt and guilty though Jen...And it gets worse every day.

And theonly tool I have to help he with is love. I tell you what - this Plan A nonsense makes such sense once a couple start recovery its untrue.

Squid is unravelling right now but she's doing so in a CONSISTENTLY LOVING environment with a husband who is trying to empathise and love her to bits. We might not do this, but it all makes SO much sense from THIS side of NC.Ah well, better put some pants on and go to work !!!!!!!!

<img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> {{{jen}}}

* GC I know how blessed I am with my job. Anyone would love it.

Its just that it has very high demands of my time and focus and thats one way I contributed to a cr@p M before the A. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Frown]" src="images/icons/frown.gif" />

In fact it was Squid's main justification for the A during the fog.

I'm trying to find a compromise at work. I'm sure I'll be OK.

<small>[ November 16, 2004, 12:32 AM: Message edited by: Bob Pure ]</small>

Hey Jen, Bob, GC... and any other 'night-shifters',

How's everyone doing today? Bob, did you ever find the beeping camo jacket???

Hey RIF ! I guess the camoflage was just too effective !! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

RIF, bless you. Thanks for serving.

I'm on the night shift, but I have a job and live in the Central Time Zone, so this is not an acceptable hour for me to be tweedling around in I-ville. Nighty night,

GC

Hey guys and gals...guess it must be the new moon...don't feel like this (or I) belong in Idiotville tonight either.

Well, going on day 6...but I almost taunt myself by saying, "What for?"

I know it's only been a little more than a week, but, I don't know what more I can do to be the husband that I should've been to brown all these years.

Radical honesty, POJA's, affection, love, little notes, cards, any question she's asked I've answered as best I could--and I somehow don't think this is enough. I think she's had it. I really don't know what else to do.

OW is nothing; means nothing. Except a dark cloud over our recovery. She's a manipulator; immature; liar; and probably anorexic. (No--I'm not making fun--trying to be truthful.) And I fell for this ploy. Played along; trusted her over brown; did my own manipulating; and feel real f@#$ing stupid about it all. Who's more of an [censored]: her or me for buying into and going along with it like nothing's wrong?

I've given brown everything she needs--lately--but it just may be too late now.

I told her (although she says I didn't--I posted it first) that I had a few phone calls when contact started up again. And I even told her how long some of the conversations were. I didn't think I had these when I was on "vacation", but phone records don't lie: she pulled up the past bill and saw I was about a week off. I really didn't remember, but it hit her in the gut once again when two of the calls were on her birthday.

I really don't know where to go from here. I'm sorta thinking now, if I do leave (which she has told me in the past and even brought up D tonight), then maybe I will relieve some of her pain. If it will, I'll start packing yesterday.

I'm sorry for such a downer in Idiotville. You guys use this as an escape and it seems every which way I turn, I'm bringing someone down. I'll stop here.

Hey LINY,

Don't be so hard on yourself... recognized your past mistakes... learn from them and find ways to prevent doing them again in the future.

Ask Brown to help you... you guys are in this together...

In following the "rules" of Idiotville, I will not edit my post to nothing, BUT...
Reading others' posts, I am just pathetic. Period.

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Ask Brown to help you... you guys are in this together... </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">RIF, thanks for the vote of confidence. However, I don't know anymore if brown really wants the "together" part anymore. I really don't. And tonight was the first night I can say without any hesitation that this is the first time I think she "truly" meant it.

I'm gonna try to get some sleep now. (It's 3am now.) You take care of yourself over there, OK?

LINY... I'll be praying for you and Brown...

Hey, where are all of the idiots tonight???

Am I the only one on the night shift?

What About Bob?????

Hey RIF, how goes it?

It is 6 am here on Tuesday.

What is it tomorrow or yesterday in old Afhgan?

I'm going to try and get to work on time today.

Another day, another dollar! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

Kimmy,

I made your famous enchilada's Sunday, and they were really, really good!

KY, LIT, Stars, SerendipT, Brown, Believer, Kiwi, YL, SS, SadFWW and all the other ladies of idiotville - kisses to you!!! You too Kimmy!

And to all the idiotville men, good morning salutes!!!

GOOD MORNING IDIOTVILLE!!!!!!!!!!

Stars,

How you doing on the computer maintenance?? I downloaded the new Windows Pack on my PC last night, and now it is running like a charm.

Do you have Windows XP? Or what version?

Lets get your PC working properly okay?

And LIT, you pay attention during that surgery today, you hear?

No daydreaming! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

Goooooooooooood Moooooooooooorning!

Already here at work, about to get ready for the good 'ole back sur-g-er-y. Should only be about 5 hours long.......she is a long winded surgeon! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" />

Weaver.....I will do my best....If only I can quit thinking about Idiotville <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" />

Hello everyone! Hello nightshift (if you are still around)! Have a new employee to tote around with me today. Not sure he's ready for Idiotville yet, so I may be sparse <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />