I know -- don't listen.... I know -- fog talk... I'm going to use these next few days to read up on plan B -- my WH has such an addictive/impuslive personality that I really think the only thing that will wake him up is the reality of losing me -- but, i will read up on plan B before making any decisions. My WH also tends to take the easy way out of situations -- which for now is spending every possible moment w/ OW so he doesn't have to face the mess he has left behind or think about the hard work that would need to be done to fix it.

I'm going to re-build my strength over the holiday - get some support and love from my family and read up on plan B.

Thank you both. I will keep you posted -- I won't be around a computer starting tomorrow a.m. until Saturday....

This is me with a sign of relief <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" />

Now, you are back on track! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

Mimi - whew... took some time to find this thread.. your sigh of relief may not last much longer -- after being out of my house for thanksgiving and with my family and time to think -- I'm going for plan B -- I am very quickly losing love and respect for my WH and need to disconnect myself from his chaos -- he stayed w/ OW all week - I did not hear from him until this morning when he was "kind" enough to call and tell me he would be home late tonight -- which again leaves me responsible for taking care of the dogs, etc...

If I don't get away from him soon, there is zero hope of us reconciling. His continued behavior, lack of respect and complete disinterest in me and my feelings is leading me to lose respect for this man and the love that I've continued to feel for him through this horrible time is dwindling.... I fear that continued exposure to him and his behavior will get me to the point where i won't be able to forgive him.... ever. I know he is the type that needs to be smacked into reality and this is the only chance of that happening. I understand there is a good chance that this will be the end but as I said above, this is the only chance for there to be an "us".

Thanks so much for all the time you spent with me. I will be drafting a letter and may run it by you.

SP,
the feelings you describe are exactly the right time to do Plan B. REad SAA and draft the letter right out of the book. Also, read Dr. James Dobson's Love Must Be Tough for some strength too.

You H sounds like mine. It took Plan B twice--the real one I moved out of state with our D and had very little contact with him. IT helped me to get sanity, take care of myself and not subject myself to hearing all the ridiculous fog talk. Some of that talk still haunts me today. I should have Plan B'd sooner. I kept believing the bull he gave me about ending things with OW.

Everything they say now will later be recanted, so don't worry now. Good luck.

I consider myself a PLAN B FAILURE. I had to be coached and prodded to stay in PLAN B. Relabel your TOPIC or start a new topic regarding your PLAN B so that you get the help you need from veterans on this. I will keep up with you though. This is such a long, hard road for you. I'm sorry you have to go through this. It sounds like you've gotten a lot stronger. That's great!!!

Thanks Mimi -- I will take your advice and re-post a Plan B thread to get some pointers and strength from others....

Anne - I appreciate your response... I will pick up that love must be tough book (many others have recommended it as well) and continue to build up my own strength and work to improve myself and take care of myself... that is all I have control over at the moment. With God's help and my family and friends, I'll be OK -- no matter how this ends up. I can't let my WH drag me down any further. Hopefully he'll snap out of his fantasy but I can't count on that happening any time soon and I need to start worrying about myself.

You sound great. If/when you feel down or weak, post here or read this thread again. It is a hard road, but I think the right one. Hang in there. Do start a Plan B thread, maybe on the Plan A/Plan B board?