I'm so sorry you are having such a hard time today. What is wrong with these men? I know if my WH was still seeing OW there is no way I would consider letting him move back in. You deserve better then that.

Kloe,
Even if my husband stops contact with OW. If he comes home sleeping on the couch and still rejecting me that would hurt so much. I want him here fully not someone here in body only.

He is being so selfish right now. Thinking of only HIS happiness. The man I married always thought of his family first. Not just himself.

My prayers right now is for God to open up his and OW's eyes to what they are doing. And for God to do his will whatever that may be. I know he will not fail me. And I know I will make it no matter if my husband comes home or not.

Hugs and prayers for you Kloe!!!

Since last week when my husband calls I have been doing plan A. No more nagging, begging, pleading or getting on his case about OW. I have noticed big changes already.

I do not call him anymore myself. Unless it's about the kids or something important. I have been trying to distance myself and give him space to deal with this whole situation. Hoping he would think about things and miss us and come home willing to work on our marriage. Also it's given me relief from the daily stress of when he was home. I do miss him but want him home when he is ready to really be with us.

Yesterday I had to pick him up at work. His car was in the garage and he asked if I could help him go get it. On the drive home he tried to bait me into a relationship conversation. One that we usually end up arguing about. I just nodded when he asked a question and didn't say anything. We actually had a really good time together. We joked, laughed, talked and there was no arguments about anything.

He told me he was sorry for being selfish but he feels that going down his sisters and trying to find a 2nd job and working on his book would benefit us in the long run. I told him I had no problems with taking some time for himself the only problem I have is with him and OW still in contact. He said he understood. I know he saw the changes in me. He looked at me when I was joking about something and said "You are really in denial about how I feel for you." Usually that would upset me and I would LB. This time I babbled back "Maybe your in denial about your feelings for me." He just smiled. I don't think he expected that at all.

This is not the man I have been seeing the last 9 months. The man that I have been around has been distant, cold, cruel, depressed and says or does anything to me to make me just let him alone. Last night I saw and spent time with the man I met and fell in love with. The last 2 months he has been pushing me away when I try to hug him or kiss him. Last night before he left I just said goodbye. He pulled me in his arms 2 times and hugged me.

Also I have been watching his cell minutes because he goes over his minutes so much. Him and OW have not been talking like they have been. It's usually 2-4 hours a night. Now it's down to 40-50 minutes. I realized before that me on his case made him do it more. Now I have been totally letting the subject about OW alone for now. I am hoping the changes I see are for the good and stick. But I know it can change from day to day. So I am just taking each day as it comes. I feel so much stronger since he left. I didn't think I would make it this far. But I have.

I'm so glad you posted, I hadn't seen anything from you for a few days and wondered if you had gone into labor. You do have us on your call list for when that does happen, right? <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

Yep.. I will let everyone know when it's happening if there is time or afterwards. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> I am frustrated though. I went to my doc appointment and still not dilated all but 1. But I am now 80% effaced. The doc that I got to see last week said they wouldn't let me go past 40 weeks but the doc I saw yesterday acted like they would let me go 2 weeks after.

I still have this feeling though it's going to happen on Thanksgiving Day. My feet and legs have been swelling up. Last night it scared me because everything was swelling but when I woke up I was fine. Seems like it only happens at night. I did gain 1/2 pound this visit. Last few visits I have lost weight. I cannot wait to finally get back into my old clothes and be able to work on myself.

How are you feeling Kloe? I am so tired lately. Who will be with you in the delivery room?

I seem to be getting bigger by the hour. I wake up every hour on the hour it seems and I have been getting horrible leg cramps. I recently read somewhere that animals can sense when you are pregnant and they will act differently. I definately think that is the case. My two dogs insist on cuddeling right next to me lately. Not so easy to sleep with a 90 lb and 50 lb dog curled up next to you. I go to the doctor tomorrow and it will be my first internal exam since the beginning so the doctor will be able to tell if anything is happening.

I'm gearing up for my talk with WH this weekend, his idea. We'll see how it goes. He wants to talk about moving back home, he doesn't want me to be home alone when I go into labor (he is going to be there for the birth). I don't know what I want. I don't think I could handle getting use to him being back and then leaving two months later. I need to hear what his intentions are. Although, the thought of having him back here does sound nice and would give us the opportunity to work on things.

I can totally relate. As much as I want my husband here. I don't think I can handle it if he comes for a few months then leaves again. I am really starting to see some good changes in him just in the last few days. But I know they say it's like a roller coaster so I am not going to get my hopes up to high.

My mom is going to be in the room with me for sure. My husband joked last night he may stay home with the kids so he doesn't hear me screaming that I hate him while I am in labor. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> I have decided he should be there. As much as he has been a butt lately I don't want him to miss out on this. Plus I think I would be more upset if he wasn't there with me.

I feel like blimp. Mine is all belly. I have not gained anywhere else which is great. I have been getting contractions but nothing regular. But I am keeping my fingers crossed that it will happen before Thanksgiving.

My three year old always ends up coming to my bed around 2 or 3 in the morning. He also likes to snuggle so close you can't even move. I push him over the next couple seconds he is right back. Also likes to put his foot on me like I am a foot prop or something. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" />

But I treasure those moments because they grow soooooooo fast. I can't believe he will be 4 on Dec 16th. I don't even want to think about him going to school.

Since Tuesday I haven't really talked to WH. Yes I talked to him once everyday but only for 2-5 minutes at the most. Usually it's about money, kids or important things. I have not LB, nagged or talked about OW once. Which is a BIG change for me. I guess I am just disappointed that he doesn't seem to miss us at all. Also he has not talked to the boys since Wed night. <img border="0" alt="[Teary]" title="" src="graemlins/teary.gif" />

I did notice all this week he has called OW 45 minutes to 1 hour. Usually it's 2-4 hours a night. I am hoping it keeps going down to finally NC. He said he will be visiting the kids tomorrow. We are suppose to take them to see the spongebob movie. I guess he may spend the night. I am sure he will sleep on the couch. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Roll Eyes]" src="images/icons/rolleyes.gif" />

I guess after hearing for the last few months that he doesn't love me, never has, doesn't want to be married to me anymore, wants a divorce and isn't happy. I am starting to believe there is not much hope. But I know things can change and feelings change daily. When I am down I try to think about meeting my new baby girl soon. But going to bed each night without him beside me makes me sad. I miss him and I pray that God will help me through this. Because it's so hard sometimes. I pray that God opens my husband and OW's eyes to what they are doing. And if my husband feels there isn't any love for me there I know that God can put that love back in his heart.

I just remembered I never packed my bag yet for the hospital. I have been feeling weird the last few hours. Crampy, sick on my stomach and major swelling. Also have this weird feeling that I need to pack my bag. So I guess I am off to do that. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

Trying to get my mind off WH but it's not working to well. Sit here thinking about what he is doing and if he is thinking about us or missing us. I sure miss him but I don't miss the heartache that I went through when he was here calling OW practically infront of my face.

I plan on packing for the hospital this weekend too, WH brought it up as well. Do you have an outfit for the baby to go home in? I have the cutest little pink one with a matching hat and blanket. Will your doctor let you have anything during labor? Mine said I could have clear liquids and lollypops. Don't forget to pack some snacks for after the baby is born in case it's the middle of the night after the cafeteria is closed. Take care!

Kloe,
I have a little yellow jogging suit and a pick outfit I am taking. They both are soooooooooo cute. I am also taking my sons outfit he wore home when he was born just incase it's a boy. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

My doctors really haven't talked to me about anything regarding my hospital stay. I never been to Frederick Hospital I am not sure what it's even like. I know they don't have birthing rooms like I did with my son. With my son I was induced two weeks after my due date. They let me eat a lite lunch because I guess they knew it would take awhile. But when I really got into the hard labor I didn't want anything. Just wanted the pain to stop. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> I remember eating ice chips and drinking water. I had my son around 3 a.m they asked me what I wanted to eat. I can't remember what I asked for but I know it was something weird and they brought it.

I went to a online site and got a list of things you should pack which is helping me decide what I really need to take. Almost forgot the camera. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" />

Take care and good luck this weekend.