This might help, too:

http://www.everymansbattle.com/wives/

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by lemonman:
Oh God, how incredibly tragic <img border="0" alt="[Teary]" title="" src="graemlins/teary.gif" /> I can think of no greater pain than losing a child (and I am not a parent yet). I am so sorry about this.

LM</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Actually, dealing with my H's A's was far more traumatic than the sudden death of our son. There are others on this site who have also lost a child who would agree with me on this point.

My reasoning for the difference, is that with a death, that is final, until the afterlife (if you believe, as I do). However, in dealing with A's, there is always the hope that the WS will change, and in fact, many do. Each LB by the WS is a deliberate choice to hurt the BS. A person who has died cannot inflict that same kind of constant pain (suicide excluded, perhaps).

Karen