</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> after I had calmed myself and was no longer acting on sheer emotion I continued to gather information, not evidence, so I could proceed in a manner that counteracted whatever the OW was doing. She became accusatory, I became the best friend...she pushed, I was the easygoing one...she lied/he lied...the usual things. And it did not cause me pain...after awhile I found their exchanges quite comical and juvenile and was able to say 'whatever' and go on with my life. Because of what I knew, I could see the direction their relationship was taking...that was of great value as far as I am concerned.
</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">This is exactly what I'm referencing. You knew your H, and you knew harassing him or OW during this time would not have been the ideal thing to do in your given situation.

You learned that Plan A...was all about taking control of YOUR actions, and not reacting emotionally.

This is the point I was trying to make, but somehow I think got lost in translation.

You became the calm one, the reasonable one...the lighthouse...and in time...your WH found his way home.

Correct ?