I say look at the WS, because they are the ones that made the vows, not the OW/OM. Yes, there are some of them out that there that is their only mission in life is to go after a married person, but that is a different topic.

Concentrating on the outside beauty is not healthy.... we all know the saying....

"Beauty is only skin deep. Rottenness goes clear to the bones."

That is why all WS and OWs lose their inner beauty as long as they choose to stay that way. Yep even our WS' lose their appealing side of their personality. That will eventually affect their physical attributes.

Time heals all wounds and scars others. It c/b the same for a BS who chooses to remain in an angry state.

Of course MB here is a venting place for many. In that need to vent others may get their feelings hurt...... we need to remember both sides.

No ws or op are attractive in an A. Not to everyone. Even some movie stars have lost their appeal due to their A (take a look at Mz J. Roberts even with twins.....when I see her pix I also see when she made and wore a shirt poking fun at her former MM's (now her H) then wife. She is no longer a good person in my eyes. Even her movies don't appeal to me. JMHO, of course.

When a WS or OP (while still in that stage) reads this stuff, they are bound to get hurt. When an Xop or Xws reads this stuff, they also could get hurt but probably realize where the anger comes from.

Am I saying don't say it? Well some of you may need that outlet but if so, be prepared to defend it. Take a good look in the mirror as well.

Remember plans A & B are to help the BS rise above all that A crap.

Now before you say or think.....but Orchid posted too..... yes, I did. I shared what happened. In fact more happened than I shared. Why those WS tell the BS' the OPs are ugly is beyong me. It sure doesn't make the WS look any better. LOL!! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> Now there is something to think about, eh? <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

L.

The OM in our case is rather homely. What's odd, I think, is that he looks a thousand percent better now than he did before they got together, and certainly better than he did when things were awful for all of us. Now, he's well rested, well dressed, cleanshaven, well fed, and generally well put together. He was none of those things before.

My ex, on the other hand, dresses much worse than she did and looks tired, old, and heartworn. She used to look truly classy. Now, well, she looks as bad as he did when they first got together, though of course they're very different in terms of physical features.

I sometimes think about what that might mean about the energy transfers between them. And then I shake my head and leave it alone. If she chooses not to see it, well, it is what it is.

<small>[ January 25, 2005, 05:07 PM: Message edited by: Just J ]</small>

Sheesh, wish the OW was ugly, but she isn't. She is 18 years younger than me. I am 5'7" 128 lbs. She is about 5'2" and 90 lbs.

On top of that (like she said to me once) she's got my husband.

Yuck.

There's NOTHING attractive about a person who carries on with a married man. They can be the most beautiful person you've ever seen....but like
Orchid said....beauty is only skin deep. Beauty fades and then waht do you have if you aren't beautiful inside? Nothing!!!

I do admit that knowing that my WH's OW is ugly makes me feel good but like believer says...she's got my husband so does it really matter? <img border="0" title="" alt="[Frown]" src="images/icons/frown.gif" />

<small>[ January 25, 2005, 07:10 PM: Message edited by: TreeReich* ]</small>