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Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 144
O
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O Offline
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 144
Thanks again to everyone. We POJA'd on her hobby, and she decided to take a break from it. Like it or lump it, it is a good sized trigger to me. Not rational, but real.

And reading this thread together got us talking rationally instead of arguing emotionally, which is honestly a frequent thing we need to work on at this point.

-OAK

Joined: Aug 1999
Posts: 15,284
J
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J Offline
Joined: Aug 1999
Posts: 15,284
OAK and FU,

The thing to remember is that POJA's can be revisited as more data comes in and you two change. What you have decided to do or not do in regarding your spouses needs or triggers will change.

I don't know much, but this I do know...you two will be different people in a year. Not vastly different, but I think different enough that what are triggers today, what are temptations today will be out of the picture in a year or so.

So both of you have patience and keep working together. Things will get better and better and trust will come back, love will come back, protection and safety will come back and as they do...the changes made for purposes of healing can be revisited from a new and stronger marriage.

God Bless,

JL

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