</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by still seeking:
Tell me about you.........
Do you believe in yourself?
You'll have to expand, I'm not really sure how to answer this. </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Can I say some other things first?
I'll take that as a yes.
I don't pretend to know everyhing, and I don't know how to get you from where you are, to where you want to be (or your marriage to where you want it to be.) I do believe it involves hope and faith.
So, do you believe in your self..........
As Christians ( and thanks for the new thread you started, it answered one of my questions.) As christians, we know God can perform miracles if we have faith, but we wonder if we have that kind of faith. We also know that he won't take away others free will in most cases. That free will results in consenquences, but he lets us make choices.
Knowing these things, you would perhaps wonder how much he (God) could, or would help you.
So, do you believe in yourself - do you believe you qualify for help from God?
Do you believe things will turn out well for you, no matter how the marriage turns out?
Do you realize that you have worth in and of your self, and that your worth does not depend on your marriage working, or what your H does?
</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">
Do you believe you can be happy again?
I'm not unhappy now. Can I be satisfied in my marriage..I don't know. I don't expect to be right this moment. Or even a few years from now. However, I do not have the ability to predict that this will improve with any reliability. I have what is past, and what is present. Right now I am unsatisfied. </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">You have answered most of the questions I had. I think you ~personally~ will do well.
There is another tool that you can use to strengthen your hope, and faith in your marriage. Perhaps you already use..........prayer. You can get answers too, not just comfort, and relief from preasure. God knows if you should invest time in recovery, or if you should move on. He is the only source of truth that sometimes fails to respond to logic. That is, he knows things we don't know, so he can expand our choices when we may tend limit them.
</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial"> I am unhappy with having a selection of choices that are all unattractive to me..and trying to best guess which will be the least bad in the long run. Meanwhile..people are dying and being born, going to school and eating lunch. I am a very insignificant piece of this thing called life, my Hs sex with another woman is more insignificant still. In a hundred years no one will know or care. </font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">These are things that God is really good at. You don't need to go with your best guess, you can take your decision to him, and get confirmation.
Please don't think that this is insignificant. If God knows each sparrow that falls to the ground, surely he counts your pain, and your feelings as infinatly more important. Surely he will rejoice, and it will be recorded by the angels if your H makes it back, and if your marriage is healed. In a hundred years, both you and I will be happy if this works - perhaps even I, with my faulty memory will remember, and comment to both of you.
I WANT my piece though. I want as much from it as I can get. I am concerned that trying to LIVE day in and day out with Hs affair will stain my life in such a way that when I am in a position to look back, I may realize that whatever aspects of life I enjoyed with H post A..the price was too high. I don't want to discount your feelings, but I believe you will do well in the long run. I have not read all your posts, and I don't know the details, but I have read enough of your help and advice to others that I have faith in you. That's why I said that. I don't believe it will leave a stain on your life, I believe God can, and will deal with that.
The short version is.........I have seen your posts, and believe you will be OK. I understand that getting from here to there will be very difficult, but I believe you will.
How do you feel about it?
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