LOL David, as we well know the WS does not think very clearly!!!!!!

Oh, I'm sure he'll take me up on it......and then on Sunday, he'll only have memories of sexy lingerie and whipped cream <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

-Caren

As I said...."WHAT AN IDIOT!" I hope this comes back to him in a big way soon, for both of you.

In my prayers!

David

<small>[ February 11, 2005, 07:31 PM: Message edited by: tanelornpete ]</small>

Caren -

Please be very careful with the Xanax - it can be very addictive. It is one of the more serious AD's, and my WW and I had a friend who became addicted and psychotic on it....please remain under a doctor and/or therapist's watchful eye on this one.

Have you tried any other (milder) AD's first?


Just my 2 cents -

TM

Hi TM - I take Xanax, Valium and Prozac - all under strict supervision from both my doc and the staff at work. Caren has the same resources as I do - things will be fine. Xanax is very good at calming down panic within minutes of takig it, and there are times when that is necessary. We are both in the medical field, and can get easy help in backing off the substances once no longer necessary. Right now, I need all three - sleep is difficult - that's when I wake in panic - and Valium helps there. Xanax, I take when I know a huge confrontation is coming - like me refusing to give up the kids.

Still, we could both use prayers that we use the medicines that God provides us witrh wisdom and care...

Your friend, David

<small>[ February 12, 2005, 08:40 AM: Message edited by: tanelornpete ]</small>

Xanax and Valium? Are you sure that's safe? These are two different kinds of mild tranquilizers and not ADs. Paxil and Zoloft are ADs.

You are taking a lot of meds. Be careful.

I have a panic disorder to begin with. I've been taking Xanax for years....you're right Mimi, it's not an Anti-D, the anti-D I am on currently is Zoloft, but they are switching me to another one...they are undecided. It might be Remeron (Which is supposed to also help with sleep) or Effexor, then they were discussing a combination of one of those and adding Wellbutrin, and then I'm on the Xanax, they recently switched me to Xanax XR (Which is extended release)they said it doesn't have the peaks and valleys that regular Xanax does....but I don't really get the feeling of "relief" I did when I was taking regular Xanax.....such is life LOL.

So, yeah, I know what I'm doing. I had heard of Remeron, I don't know it's side effects, but if it'll help me sleep, I'm all for that, although my husband is supposed to be on effexor, and it worked really really well for him, so I'd kinda like to try that. I have an appointment Monday to get the Anti-D changed.

-Caren

Wellbutrin doesn't have sexual side effects. You know what I mean. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

Hope everything goes well tonight.

I hope everything goes well tonight as well....I ended up sending him a text message saying what I intended to do with the whipped cream LOL, when he talked to my DD10 to tell her goodnight, he talked to me after and said "Are you having fun?" I said "Whatever do you mean?" He said "You're text message..." I said "Oh, that...LOL" He said "I just don't know what's going on, you know what I mean?" I said "Actually, no I don't know what you mean, why don't you explain that to me?" He said "I'll get with you" (Meaning he'd talk to me about it today) and I said "Yeah, that's what I was hoping....that you'd GET with me" He started laughing and said "Goodnight Caren" I said "Night!!" and hung up the phone!!! So I'm hoping he will still come over here tonight!!!! Keep your fingers crossed for me.

I started a journal yesterday, I don't know why I haven't had one all along, but I decided I'd start on yesterday. I wrote my apprehensions about going into Plan B down, it always helps me to write (or type) things out.

For the last 3 nights I've dreamt of my husband...it's starting to weird me out. Last nights dream we were in a school bus, with a bunch of my family, and we were all in costumes (No clue what that was about) and it seemed like it was my birthday.....anyway, my EX-HUSBAND was there too, and I started arguing with him (I never even talk to him, we've been divorced for like 17 years and when we do talk we never argue), and my WH defended me, and I sat on his lap facing him and nuzzled in his neck and he held me, and I felt so safe.....then I woke up.

The only thing I can make out of it is that I don't really feel so safe right now, and he does make me feel so safe when I'm in his arms...I think my subconscious is messing with me about Plan B....stupid subconscious!!!!

-Caren

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by mimi1254:
<strong> Xanax and Valium? Are you sure that's safe? These are two different kinds of mild tranquilizers and not ADs. Paxil and Zoloft are ADs.

You are taking a lot of meds. Be careful. </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Mimi - Yeah, I know what I'm doing - all under strict Dr supervision, and I don't mix 'em. Also don't take them because of AD - take Prozac for that. I take them for anxiety disorder, which, for some reason, is leaving now that WW is gone.

Caren - I 'dream' of that kind of affection. If your dreams are they way you really are, I stand by my decision that your WH is a total idiot.

David

Well hopefully he'll snap out of it, eh?

I dunno, I still have no answer as to whether he is going to come over tonight or not, I talked to him earlier, and he said he'd talk to me later.....well he get's off work in about 45 minutes, and it's not like I need him to come over the second he gets off work, but after that who the hell knows where he'll be, at least when he's there I know how to get ahold of him. I mean I have his home number and all that, but his cell is out of minutes, so he doesn't answer it.

His dumb [censored] needs to call me and tell me what's going on. I'm so sure, does he have like a totally full social calendar? NO...NO he doesn't give me a friggen break, it's p*ssing me off. I guess it's if he has no better offers....Yep I need plan B, or I'm going to snap his neck.

-Caren

Caren - I'm so sorry - I can totally understand. Getting there much faster than I wanted to myself...

Hope all goes well for you...

David

Oh he's coming over here tonight....and I'll do is sans LB's, but one way or another he will be coming over here damn it.

I WILL get mine before I go to Plan B. He doesn't know I'm ready to kick his teeth down his throat. I've been nice when I've spoken to him.

I called him about a 1/2 hour ago and said "So, you planning on calling me when you get home?" He said "Yep" I said "Okay talk to you then" and hung up. I mean I don't expect him to talk about sex at work, I just don't like him being all "We'll see" although he's done that to me for a long time. I think I'm just super sensitive to it today, knowing what tommorrow is...ya know?

I absolutely HAVE to be nice and loving, even if he blows me off tonight...I can't make him feel pressured, I have to leave him with warm fuzzy feelings.........it's hard to do when I just want to slap some sense into him LOL!!!!

I have to have my Mom watch the kids or something tommorrow so I can go and do this without them. And then come home, and they won't be here to answer the phone.

-Caren

Okay well, finally talked to WH, he said he's going out running around and he may stop by later, he said "I'm not coming over to watch a movie" I said "Well that's okay, since I have no movie" He said "Okay well I'll probably come by later." I said "Okay, probably isn't good enough, you either are or you aren't" He said "Caren, I'm not giving you a time" I said "I didn't ask for a time I said I want to know if you're definitely coming." He said "Yes, I'll be there...I'm just not sure when" I said "Okay."

Well, it's not the romantic evening I'd hoped for, but ya know, hopefully in the end I'll get what I was aiming for.

-Caren

Okay guys....gonna go lay on the couch and watch a movie, I hope that my WH doesn't dog me out and not come over, but even if he does....his loss, I'm sure he'll call if he decides against it, and I'm just gonna say "That's okay honey, maybe some other time" (Like the 12th of never...is that good for you?)

-Caren

Okay well WH didn't come over last night. He called me about 11:30 PM and said he felt really sick. I said "What's wrong?" He said "I dunno, I ate some gyros over at my friends, and I've been feeling sicker and sicker all night...I was going to have you come over here...but I just feel like I'm going to throw up." I said "Okay, maybe some other time" (Very sweetly) He said "Are you mad at me?" I said "No, you can't help it if your sick" He started talking again then stopped suddenly and I hear the phone drop and I can here him throwing up, and then our dogs (Always very concerned) must have been in the bathroom too trying to see what was wrong because I'd hear him wretch and then say "Get out of here!!!" and then some more throwing up and another "Dogs!!! Get out of here!!!!" He threw up for like 5 minutes and then he said......"Are you still there?" I said "Yep I'm still here" He said "I'm really sorry" I said "No problem...go to bed. I hope you feel better." He said "Okay I'm sorry, I'll call you in the morning" I said "Okay" He said "Goodnight" I said "Night" and got off the phone and went to bed.

I would have said he was lying, and that maybe the OW was there...but she has no clue that he's still seeing me, I believe she thinks we only talk regarding DD10. So if she was there, he wouldn't have been able to talk to me so long...etc.

It was hard not to just go over there and take care of him......that's what I do, I take care of everyone. But I didn't, I just went to bed.

So, hopefully he doesn't stay home from work today (usually nothing stops him from working) because he's sick, because I really didn't want to go to his house and do this, I don't want to hand him the PBL letter while he's throwing up..LMAO, so I hope he feels well enough to go in to work.

I'm already jonesing for him to hold me, just to be wrapped in those big strong arms....but I know it's not gonna happen now.

I'll write more in my "Caren's Plan B Journey" thread after I give him the letter.

-Caren

Originally posted by CarenMc:
I don't want to hand him the PBL letter while he's throwing up..LMAO, so I hope he feels well enough to go in to work.

Caren, will you please start Plan B today and STOP being so spineless. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Embarrassed]" src="images/icons/blush.gif" />

This is the BEST time to give him the Plan B letter according to Steve Harley. I told Steve my wife was depressed and I was going to advise her to go on AD's. Steve said "HELL NO," let her suffer for her actions, it's the only way she'll come to her senses. AD's will only make her feel better and now she'll feel better while talking thru FOG.

I hope he misses work for the entire week, the more he suffers Emotionally, Financially, and with OW the sooner he will be home. Do everything you can to make him suffer except NC by you at all, ARE YOU LISTENING?

Give him the damn letter today while he is sick and suffering, add more pain to his life. This is FOG BUSTING time. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

I hope he Pukes his guts out when he gets your letter.

Quit trying to make his life better, you're ticking me off. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Mad]" src="images/icons/mad.gif" />

Ever hear of Tough Love? If you really Love this guy and want him back give him Plan B today.

Every guy would like to have 2 women, it's every males fantasy. In fact we would like a Harem if possible. So please stop providing him with the OW, because in effect you are. Do you get it?

If you don't give him that letter you DESERVE everything you get, don't blame the OW, this is your fault why this has dragged on so long.

Act as thought he has Died and get on with your life (except no grieving, you've done enough.

From what I've read in ALL your post I think he'll be back sooner than you think.

How much do you hate the OW? Do Plan B today and she will be suffering very soon. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

Good Morning Caren!

What TA said... loud and clear... another way of saying it, at least in MY head, is:

Being the giving, giving, giving person that you are... it's just YOU to want to take care of your H, to think FIRST about HIS feelings... and in this case think about how "terrible" and "thoughtless" it would be to give him your PBL when he's sick. Ain't NOTHIN' wrong with that, in my estimation! ...

B U T !

In the process of BEING YOU... it's TOO DAMN EASY to FORGET that you are being abused, misused, mistreated, betrayed, neglected, lied to, abandoned...ETCETERA, AD NAUSEUM....by your husband. Remember?

Your Plan B Letter is an act of love, of the highest order. Your H is a LUCKY MAN to even get the opportunity to receive it!!

Ok, I feel better... thanks <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

edited to add:

ps. I'm more worried about the DOGS than your H! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

<small>[ February 13, 2005, 07:38 AM: Message edited by: tqt ]</small>

WOO!! You're supposed to warn a person before those incoming 2x4's LOL

I NEVER said I wasn't going to give it to him today.....I said I hope he goes to work, I want to give it to him there....I don't want to go to his house and give it to him, that gives him the opportunity to be alone with me and try to read it while I'm there .... etc. etc. At work he's got other people there....he can read it AFTER I leave.

I AM GIVING HIM THE LETTER TODAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You guys ROCK!!! I'm glad you're so concerned, you are exactly what I need <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

Thank you,

-Caren

Just talked to WH on the phone and he doesn't know how he's feeling because apparently I woke him up with my phone call. I said "Are you going in to work today?" He said "Yeah, I have to" I said "Okay, well I just wanted to see how you were feeling, I'll talk to you later."

SOOOOOO I am indeed going to his work today to give him the PBL.

I am going to my Mom's for lunch today, she's making Roast Beef and Potatoes ..... comfort food <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

His shop doesn't open until Noon, so I'm taking the kids over to my Mom's for lunch, and then after lunch I'm going to his shop and giving him the letter. Then I'm gonna come home here and settle myself down (I'm afraid I'm going to cry when I give it to him), then after I compose myself I'm going back to get the kids.

Then I'll probably be posting my butt off on my Plan B Journey thread.

-Caren

Cool <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

Hey, just a thought...

any idea approx what time today? I guess Sundays can be sorta slow here, so I was thinking if you shouted out a heads up to all of your fans, more of us could try to be around for you when you get back home!