OK, Georgia.

What's up?

Would I be too entitled to expect you to specifically address me-among others- in your last post?

re?

You asked me to stick with you. I did.

Say GOODBYE, MIMI! That would do....

Sorry, I didn't mean that I am disappearing forever, or that this is goodbye, Mimi.....

I will have very limited access for the next 2 weeks, and I'm probably going to very little fun to converse with anyway during that time.

HOWEVER, you still NEED input on YS from time to time, right? I'm not gone, just at a huge cross-roads.

Georgia

Is this a MAN THING?

Allergy is bothering you (translated:sad and tearful) so I will flee...

Hope not.

It's OK if you were mainly referring to absence due to computer unavailablity.

NOT OK- if you are "running away from" or trying to "stuff" your negative feelings-only wanting to post about light and fluffy stuff....

You have a lot to offer folks here if you chose to do so....

Mimi....you've put a smile on my face (thank you). I just read your edit...

I hope that someday I can bury my CA'er the way you certainly have!!

Mimi...you know it goes without saying how much you've done for me. I remember well that day (I think in Nov) that WW told me not to come home, and I had a near panic attack. It was you that emboldened me to "get right back up on my horse" (or something like that) and go home. It was you that told me that it was TOTALLY UNACCEPTABLE for her to treat me with such contempt, like she was entitled to sit there and talk on the phone with another man in OUR home.

I had better stop as I know that I can never compile an exhaustive list of what you've done for me. I think you deserve every little fold in your toga, every molecule of granite in your pedestal, every baubble in your tiara. I know that someday, if not already, not only H, but also OS and YS will know that W / Mom models Proverbs 31, like her GM did. She passed the torch, and you didn't drop it.

Reading your second post, I don't know how to respond. Perhaps there is some desire to stick my head in the sand. This stinks. But, it is correct that I will have little internet access. I feel uncomfortable (sometimes) just signing on to say "I feel rotten".

But, I must admit, this (even at this point) isn't as bad as living with WW and her constant affixation with OM.

And....I'm not really sure what you mean that I have a lot to offer folks here (and yes, I do chose to do so).

Georgia

To name a few things you can help with:

EFFECTIVE PLAN B; COPING WITH PLAN B; LIVING THROUGH PLAN B; PLAN D AFTER PLAN B; and so on and so forth.....

Thank you, Mimi.....

I think I was getting close to having a pity party, but you've kinda pulled me out of that.

You'll not believe this. We haven't had an accident in QTR2, so we are all being rewarded with (right down the hall from my office)......

....ice cream sundaes.

Georgia

Enjoy the ice cream!!!!!!!

I really think that you have a lot to offer people here, Georgia. As I think I have already mentioned to you there doesn't seem to be too many people actively in plan B who post here. So it is very important that you be able to comment on your experience to help others.

I'm sorry you are feeling so down. But feelings change... we KNOW that. I hope you don't leave us but if you feel it's better for you to detach from MB for the next couple of weeks, you know what's best.

I hope you'll at least come back to check on me! I may be in your shoes soon, who knows.

Have a nice trip. Take care.

Okay, that's about it folks. I'm getting ready to head out.

I will try to sneak a few minutes at a keyboard in Houston so I can pop in and say hi (to all including MIMI...).

Also, thanks to cc and dru for the kind comments.

Mimi .... you're in charge of my thread while I'm gone. Guard it well!!

Have a good weekend, all.....

Georgia

Georgia,

You are an inspiration to me - and I'm sure I'm not the only one.

I am amazed at how you have established a new life for yourself - simply amazed. I thought I could do it - but have made little progress.

Let me recount some steps along your way :

* Pottery class
* Bold action on the car swap and move-out.
* Moving into an interesting apartment
* Painting etc. the apartment.
* Maintaining and improving your relationships with your sons and DILs.
* Even taking a little trip with your son.
* Making connections with Reggie and other neighbors (the cop, for example).
* Searching for and buying a house.
* Fixing up your new house.
* Keeping things going well on your job.
* Keeping a respectful attitude toward your ww while at the same time setting boundaries (calling the police to get her to leave you alone).
* CASA
* Board of your new HOA (or neighborhood association)
* Stepping up to the plate and helping your neighbor Mrs. Reese.
* Dealing somehow with your assistant's illness.
* Getting deeply involved in your new church.
* Maintaining and reestatblishing contacts with your old friends.
* Researching the original owner of your house and making contacts with his son.
* ...

Wow, man. The next thing we know you'll be governor of Georgia!

I can tell you, that if I had done all that, my wife would be running after me begging me to take her along for the ride.

I can only imagine how much it hurts you to be in this situation, but looking at how far you have come, I know you will endure and whatever the outcome, it will be good.

You, sir, are a winner - and you are making pretty good lemonaide right now.

So, don't stop talking to us just because you have a few dark days - which all of us understand.

May God bless you,

-AD

LOL!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Maybe he is the GOVERNOR OF GA! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Good Morning to all -

Wow, AD….I didn’t even know that anyone was paying attention!! Thanks for the recap, I appreciate it. However, I am not now, and I will not accept the nomination of my party to become, the guvna’ of Jorja.

I left home at about 9:00 AM Sunday morning to head to my in-laws house about 400 miles from here. I stopped in Atlanta for lunch at a Sonny’s Barbeque (smoked turkey)and got to their house about 3:00 PM. I stopped when I got near (at a Wal-Mart) and got MIL a dozen red roses.

We spent a while just on general conversation. I could tell that everyone was really ready to talk about what was on our minds, so I told them that I wasn’t sure if they were aware of the status of what was going on. I told them that our divorce was scheduled for Wednesday, August 3. MIL broke down crying and said she told FIL that was why I was coming over there, to tell them that we had a final divorce date.

We spent several hours talking about the whole situation. MIL is taking this really hard. She said she hasn’t told anyone, even her sister who lives nearby, because she is so ashamed and embarrassed. BTW – Her Sis has 4 kids, all of which have been divorced. I tried to console her and tell her that none of this was their fault and they had nothing to be ashamed of. I told her that I thought she should talk to someone, her sister or other friends, about the situation.

Both she and FIL talked about how they can’t get through to her at all. As long as they keep the conversation non-threatening, she is pleasant. FIL tells me that he has been very, very direct in confronting her and she refuses to talk to him about it. He says now he just e-mails her with his thoughts so he knows she at least reads them, even if he doesn’t respond.

MIL told me that she too has confronted her a number of times, but she just can’t get through to her. She told me about the Mother’s Day incident. WW called her and they were talking. MIL asked if she had spoken to me recently, and WW said “No, and I’m having a good day and you’re not going to ruin it.” Then she hung up on her. MIL said they haven’t talked about this situation since then.

MIL is extremely concerned about WW’s health and her loss of health insurance. WW believes that she has some significant health issues such as Rheumatoid Arthritis but she said there is yet to be any definitive diagnoses. I think her imagination is running away with her, because she said that she can see WW being wheelchair bound and alone. I told her that WW and I had discussed her potential need to be taken care of before I left her, and she said she had some concerns about whether or not OM would care for her the way I had.

She also asked about the house. She said that she knows that WW wants to stay in the house. I told her that my attorney was going to strongly argue to have the house sold. MIL said she had told WW that she wouldn’t be able to stay in that house and continue her luxurious lifestyle without me.

I thought it was interesting that MIL brought up that what seems to have upset WW the most out of this whole situation was the loss of her car. She said that WW was really upset over that, and it seemed to hurt her more than losing her home, family, or husband. (Sung to the tune of “And she’ll have fun, fun, fun till her hubby takes her T-bird away”.)

I told them that I have been instructed by my attorney to make a very detailed list of everything I want from the house and have it ready to present in court. MIL asked if WW was doing the same thing and I told her that I assumed her attorney would be instructing her to do the same. I assured them that I didn’t plan to try and get any of their “family” items that had been passed down from their deceased relatives.

They continue to be very kind to me, telling me that I am always welcome at their house. It was so hard to think of all the visits to their home as a family and how kind they have always been to me. It was having to close a chapter of my life that has been very, very good. And, even though I may continue to go over and visit, it will never be the same. I know their health is declining and this is so hard on them. FIL has already had 2 heart attacks, and I don’t think he will live a lot longer. MIL did say that WW is still blaming me for letting them know about this and says that they shouldn’t have to be involved.

Anyway, that’s it for the trip to the IL’s house. I left there Sunday night heading back to Atlanta. It was actually cool that night (up in the mountains). I left there with my sunroof open and windows down. It was such a reflective time to think about all that is going on as I drove through the mountains on the 2 lane roads on a dark, cool night.

I got to the hotel in Atlanta down by the airport about midnight Sunday night and slept like a rock. The next 2 days in Houston went by like a blur, but our meetings went very well.

I am involved in probably the biggest project I’ve ever been involved in and it’s kind of nice to be able to have a challenge to divert me right now.

Oh yes, when I got off the plane in Atlanta I had a voice mail from CASA to call the office today, they have a case ready for me. I am excited about that.

GOOD MORNING, MIMI….

That, my friends, is the life of Georgia to this point.

Georgia

Hi Georgia:

Are you sure you are not the governor?

I'm reading PEOPLE OF THE LIE..includes powerful stuff about EVIL FORCES...

Really fits with our religious beliefs....

That's great about your job project and all of your other projects....

HANG IN THERE.....

Hi Mimi...

I'm leaving a few minutes early get to the CASA office.

Later.....

Georgia

Honestly, I think that in the 2 years I have been reading and posting here, this is the strangest situation I have seen.

I just don't know how on earth your WW could still be talking to OM for so many hours every single day. What on earth do they find to talk about?

And I don't know how she can continue to ignore her father, her mother, and her 2 sons when they try to talk to her about it.

I understand the whole scenario of the addiction, and the fog, but after this much time she has got to see how much damage her R with OM is causing.
Unbelievable.

I truly see your situation as being one of the oddest on the boards.

I keep reading your posts, hoping to find that one last puzzle piece that would some how make sense. She has parents who love her, wonderful sons with good wives. A nice home, a nice car, church family, good friends, and she would throw it all away for a R with OM spent talking on the phone for hours every day? Huh???? Knowing full well that his own W is working to pay the bills. How could any woman spend hours every day on the phone with someone elses H? Knowing that his own W is working her butt off to support him? Your WW is smarter than all that!

Without a doubt there is some type of serious mental illness going on. But I am starting to see the possiblity that it has been in her for a long time - not just these past few years.

That business about not wanting to have people over to the house, even your closest friends or family members makes me think that there is some type of illness that makes her somehow want to hide. After all, the current OM is not right here in front of her. He is somewhat "safe" as long as he is still in Canada.

I just don't get it.

In so many of these cases you can find some sort of "excuse" or some sort of "reason". Alchohol, drugs, por addiction. Soem tiems the WS has been through a tragic ordeal recently (My WxH was addicted to porn and he had found out his father molested his niece).
I am not saying that these are excuses, or even a good "reason" for an A. But at least you can point to the sitch and say "well, they were a good person but when X happened, and then B happened, they became vulnerable, and then the A happened.
But your WW.....I just don't get it.
I just don't get it.

Georgia,

While you have been moving forward, your WW has been stuck. One day she'll wake up and see that everybody she cares about has moved on. It will be a horrible shock. But, I don't see anything you can you do about it.

-AD

Good Morning to all -

Well, 6 days to D-Day. My follow-up appointment with my attorney is next Monday, only 2 days before D-Day. I have been working on putting together my list of items I want from the house. It is much more time consuming than you might think, and trying to mentally walk through the house not having been there in 7 months (7 months today) is difficult as well.

WOF - Just let me add to your comments that my IC, in his 70's, tells me that my case is also one of the strangest he has ever seen. He tells me that he has never seen a man have such power over a woman as OM has over WW.

Of course, I've got to list the things I took when I moved out as well, so she might ask for me to bring some things back. I've got a nice Pier-1 wicker dresser and an ornate headboard/footboard that I anticpate she might want back. I am going to try not to be divisive about the belongings. I would like to have our dining room suite as it is a style that would look very good in my dining room in my house.

Last night I went to Home Depot and bought 2 pallets of retaining wall stone that will be the foundation of my pond. I've asked #1S if he will go with me to pick them up in his truck. Also, the trucking company is supposed to deliver a load of top soil either today or tomorrow. I'm getting serious about my pond, I hope to make significant process on this next week. Again, my goal is to have this entire project (pond, deck, pergola) finished by fall so I can have guests over and entertain on the deck. Way too hot for that right now. (An MB hoe-down at Georgia's house?)

Also, I want to "unpaint" my bedroom windows so I can open them. My bedroom windows will face out over the pond and by the time cooler weather gets here I want to be able to open my windows at night and hear the waterfalls.

I went to Bi-Lo last night and bought some low fat, no sugar added Breyers ice cream. I know that the Goddess recomended Edy's, but Breyers was BOGOF & I had a $1 off coupon on each carton, so 2 cartons cost me like $2.50. I got Rocky Road and I must admit it is very good.

And, I got my CASA case yesterday afternoon. Obviously, I can't go into details here. But I think it is okay to say that it involves 3 kids under the age of 6 where domestic violence and meth use have been an issue in the home. Mom got beat up bad enough to have a ruptured spleen last month. So..that is something I am definitely anxious to get started on.

Okay, that is what has transpired in the 24 hours (I'm not Keifer Sutherland, either).

GOOD MORNING, MIMI......

Georgia

Who's that? Is he a movie star? Does he live in Georgia?
Hmmmmm.....

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Hi Mimi....

He is the main character (real name) of the TV show "24". On the show, he is Jack Bauer. Each show is meant to encompass a period of 24 hours, hence the name. It's what I thought of what I summarized my last 24 hours. And, JEB got his name from "Jack Eddie Bauer", a compilation of "Jack Bauer" (from "24") and "Eddie Bauer" (the clothing store).

However, Jack usually has a much more intense 24 hour period than do I.

BTW - He is the son of Donald Sutherland, who you may recall was popular in the 70's mainly for his role in the movie (not TV show) M*A*S*H*

I have no idea where he lives. Probably not Georgia.

Georgia