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Sleepless, I am so angry and frustrated for you! I guess I shouldn't be surprised that a WS would use the children against a BS, but it still boggles my mind the depths to which some WSs will stoop. I feel so sorry for your 18-year-old. He has to feel so conflicted. And your 8-year-old being told what to say! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/mad.gif" alt="" /> You definitely have my prayers! Maybe it's because I've been up with a cranky, itchy, whiny 9-year-old all night so far and I'm on my last good nerve, but reading your thread made my blood boil. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/mad.gif" alt="" /> You want me to sic my weenie dog on your WW for you? Weenster may be little, but she has the heart of a pit bull sometimes.
Me 40, STBXWH 43
Married 16 years
D-day 01/25/05
Son 14, Daughter 10
Divorce almost final - I hope!
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Hi, Sleepless.
Hang tough sir.
I still think that the 18 year old needs to learn to stand on his own. If he is choosing to make decisions to lie to the court, then he needs to learn how to survive on his own.
I am curious if the lawyer was able to hear the conversation with your son.
I am also curious as to what you are accused of lying about.
I am praying that you are absolved of any wrongdoing on Tuesday, and that your wife gets to spend some time behind bars soon.
I don't mean to be harsh, Sleepless, but her soul needs a serious wake-up call.
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I can't believe she would manipulate our son that way.
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I hope that you CAN believe that, and be prepared for worse. Don't get caught off guard or surprised at anything she says or does. She is desperate to 'win' at any cost, and is capable of anything.
God bless,
Gimble
-An affair is the embodiment of entitlement, fueled by resentment and lack of respect.
-An infidel will remain unreachable so long as their sense of entitlement exceeds their ability to reason.
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any chance that conversation with your son, along with the background prompting, was recorded?
Cafe Plan B link http://forum.marriagebuilders.com/ubbt/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2182650&page=1 The ? that made recovery possible: "Which lovebuster do I do the most that hurts the worst"? The statement that signaled my personal recovery and the turning point in our marriage recovery: "I don't need to be married that badly!" If you're interested in saving your relationship, you'll work on it when it's convenient. If you're committed, you'll accept no excuses.
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KA, my thoughts exactly...
Life may not be the party we hoped for, but while we are here we might as well dance!
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Sleepless... dont tell us anything until AFTER the court hearing ...wishing you the best for Tuesday but sorry you have to have your day in court in the first place.
Praying it will all work out for you
Life may feel as if you are constantly getting kicked on a daily basis, living is about picking yourself up each day and going on and on and on regardless.
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SIS (ok, now that's weird... calling another dude sis... I think I'll just call you Sleepless from now on, k?)
Anyway... you should definately do some research into PAS (Parental Alienation Syndrome). This is a very real problem and is taken VERY seriously by the courts. In Canada, and I think in the US as well, it alone is grounds for custody in many cases. Also, it can be used to force counselling and therapy which, if this is happening (and it sure sounds like it is) is something your son will definitely need.
My experience with this has been pretty nasty and I would seriously urge you to do some reading on it and talk to your lawyer about it. A lot of damage can be done to your son so you want to make sure you address this asap.
Sincerely wishing you and your son the best,
John
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Hey SNS,
I read the entrie thread and am up to date now on what happened since I was away.I feel so bad,like I abandoned you! What a story but you know,there have been more than one terrible saga like this so I hope,at least,you feel like you are not alone.I think I mentioned waaaay back that it could get ugly and apparently it has,big time.
So,I will be following you as well as the other's and hoping for God's intervention here because this madness has to be stopped.Stay strong.
O
BW(me)40
DDay 10/11/03
Divorcing
'The Reformer'- enneagram type 1
~Let Higher Minds Prevail~
---------------
~Life isn't complicated,we make it that way~
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Hi, Sleepless! I hope you haven't posted because you're out having fun this weekend. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" /> When you have a chance, please let us know how you're doing. Now it's my turn for a little threadjack. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" /> I cooked with fire last night! I sparked up WH's sacred gas grill...without even exploding it (although I was tempted). Last night was fish. Tonight I grill real macho food: steak! Now, back to your regularly scheduled thread...
Me 40, STBXWH 43
Married 16 years
D-day 01/25/05
Son 14, Daughter 10
Divorce almost final - I hope!
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"Now, back to your regularly scheduled thread... " Not yet.... Pebbles, if you still have eyebrows it was a success no matter how the food turned out <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" />. Also, if fire shoots out from underneath the grill---turn the gas off, the hose got disconnected somehow. Not that I know that from experience or anything LOL. Now it's back to SIS's regularly scheduled thread... <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />
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Also, if fire shoots out from underneath the grill---turn the gas off, the hose got disconnected somehow. Not that I know that from experience or anything LOL. Yikes! I'm glad I didn't know about that before I sparked up the sacred grill! I touched some of WH's beloved power tools today. I used the chainsaw!! Hey, there was a big branch that needed trimming. I felt so...manly? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" /> Okay, Sleepless, I'm going to keep jacking your thread until you reply. Don't make me get out the giant barbecue tongs and come after you! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" /> Seriously, though, I hope you're okay.
Me 40, STBXWH 43
Married 16 years
D-day 01/25/05
Son 14, Daughter 10
Divorce almost final - I hope!
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I'm doing OK. Clenching my teeth a lot though! I still think that the 18 year old needs to learn to stand on his own. If he is choosing to make decisions to lie to the court, then he needs to learn how to survive on his own. He's on his own now. He's stuck in California and wants to get to Europe this weekend. He'll need to be on his own for awhile. He knows I won't beat him up, but I won't reward him either. I am curious if the lawyer was able to hear the conversation with your son. My lawyer heard MOST of it. She just sat there and shook her head. You could hear WW feeding the lines.! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" /> I am also curious as to what you are accused of lying about. Sorry. I was accused of lying that there was no parenting plan in place and that DS8 was supposed to be in Europe. I explained to the detective that the parenting plan never came up, but if it had, there was no parenting plan in effect, because I had rescinded my legal joinder to it two days after WW posted it. There was a long silence on the line, and then a "this is really a civil matter for the courts now." I hope that you CAN believe that, and be prepared for worse. Don't get caught off guard or surprised at anything she says or does. She is desperate to 'win' at any cost, and is capable of anything. That! is abundantly clear now. Papa bear had salmon over the weekend! I don't expect recovery. I'm concerned for DS8 if the judge finds in my favor tomorrow, and I need to think about a solution for the lawyers and the judge. I have this small concern that WW will do something drastic if she loses her control. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/frown.gif" alt="" /> I think WW may need to lose her job in Europe and our sons for that wakeup call. I hope that's enough!!! May the Lord Bless and Keep you, and all of our brave soldiers who have given their life so that we may be safe and free! Amen
What doesn't kill us makes us stronger.
Me 41
WS 39
DS 19, DS 9
DDay 2/25/05
Divorcing....
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Sleepless it is!
Thanks for the heads up on the parenting syndrome. I'll check it out tomorrow.
What doesn't kill us makes us stronger.
Me 41
WS 39
DS 19, DS 9
DDay 2/25/05
Divorcing....
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Glad to have you back O-girl. I didn't feel abandoned..... it gave Gimble something to do <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> Thanks for the confidence and encouragement. Let's see what happens. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />
What doesn't kill us makes us stronger.
Me 41
WS 39
DS 19, DS 9
DDay 2/25/05
Divorcing....
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I touched some of WH's beloved power tools today. I used the chainsaw!! Hey, there was a big branch that needed trimming. I felt so...manly? AHHHHhhhh! Don't touch the manly tools. It makes us insecure!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" /> I'm doing well. I was surrounded by my family at an annual reunion/canoe trip in the Midwest. I took them Copper River Salmon to share on the grill. Yum!! It's only here for a month, so get yours soon!! I'm doing OK. I have my suit laid out with my Winnie the Pooh tie. I'll be great. It's still all about my son. SIS Time for bed and my meeting with destiny! P.S. Be careful with the chainsaw woman!! They're unusually dangerous when they "catch" <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" /> !!
What doesn't kill us makes us stronger.
Me 41
WS 39
DS 19, DS 9
DDay 2/25/05
Divorcing....
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Hi, Sleepless.
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That! is abundantly clear now. Papa bear had salmon over the weekend!
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That is good news.
I will be praying for you.
Gimble
-An affair is the embodiment of entitlement, fueled by resentment and lack of respect.
-An infidel will remain unreachable so long as their sense of entitlement exceeds their ability to reason.
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I'm doing OK. I have my suit laid out with my Winnie the Pooh tie. I'll be great. It's still all about my son. You put on your Winnie the Pooh tie and go kick some butt, Sleepless! If there is any justice at all in this world, you will prevail. You'll be in my thoughts and prayers. P.S. Be careful with the chainsaw woman!! They're unusually dangerous when they "catch" <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" />
!! Mwwaahaahaa (my evil laugh). <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />
Me 40, STBXWH 43
Married 16 years
D-day 01/25/05
Son 14, Daughter 10
Divorce almost final - I hope!
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SnS, Good to hear you had a nice time. Salmon.... yum.... out here they make salmon into lomi (soaked in hawaiian salt, onions & tomatoes). Goes great with beer. I love smoked salmon. Awwhhh..... one of the things I miss about the mainland. ;( U sound much better despite what has been thrown at you and that makes me <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> . BTW, watch out..... women nowadays are not only using guy's powertools....we are even kicking some butt on the speedways. LOL!!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" /> take care, L.
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prayers going out to you today
what we do in life......echoes in eternity!
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Echoing nikko, thinking of you.
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Praying for you today Sleepless that all goes as you would wish it. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />
Life may feel as if you are constantly getting kicked on a daily basis, living is about picking yourself up each day and going on and on and on regardless.
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