from CSUE -
Imagine my surprise one day, when he told me he LOVED me!!! Sheesh.....I was soooo stunned, I can't begin to tell you. He loved ME????

Though it is not my place to judge, (good thing too) I have a hard time believing that someone who was really born again could, or would act like this. If your heart is really changed through faith in our savior, you become a new person.
My opinion - but it doesn't make much sense to me to say you are saved then hit on someone other than your spouse.

and Hi - I'm back from my trip.

SS

Yes SS

I can truly say that I am.

Of course I worry too much about A2, DD & her fella who is also overseas, my son who is going into the Army, but isn't that what mums do? ......lol

No longer fall apart - well so far <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> - when I get official news like I used to. I reckon I was still a bit depressed then.

Diabetes is ok but still over weight which I will have to loose.. dont they have magic pills YET for that? bugger!! lol

Thanks SS, I can tell you its great to be a normal person whatever that is these days.

And I hope all is ok with you to?

Yes AW, things are mostly well at our house. I was about to say "every thing is fine" but we are pretty normal, and have our good, and bad days. Mostly good, and I am thankful for that.

I am glad that Mum's worry - that is one of the good things in the world, I hope it never changes.

As far as magic pills for weight - let me know when you find them, and till then, I will exercise and be careful of what I eat, and still be a little overweight. Yes, I agree with you on that lol.

SS

AW,

You're right...it's rarely a dull moment on this thread!

SS....

I suppose that was the point I was trying to make...here with all of landscaper's trying to convert me to "Born Again", and he then HITS on me????

We talked about the sinfulness of this VERY issue after it happened. He said he would pray about it and talk to his minister. It was pretty awkward to deal with him for awhile; then when I saw him last April - he made some comment about me being "proper", and that THAT was the problem! I was really <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" /> about that one.

T&L,
Thank you for taking the time to post. I enjoy reading, and I learn much.

Do you understand your feelings about people posting or not posting to you here? I have been thinking about that. It is interresting.

SS

Interesting you should comment on that. One time, in the extremely trouble first year of our marriage, my W had smashed a lot of dishes and stuff - an entire set of china ($1200) etc. At that time, she didn't have a driver's licence. I was driving her to the university each day. So, after all this horrible stuff - during which she was sleeping in the other room and I was literally sleeping with my shoes on - because I never knew when she was going to appear and start breaking glass again - I drove her to the university one morning.

As I watched her walk away from the car, I wished I never had to see her again.

Soon after I got to work, she called and wanted me to come get her. She had finished her first class. She had another class at 11am, but didn't want to hang around the campus for an hour and a half. I told her that I was working -and I thought it was silly for me to spend an hour driving back and forth to get her, take her home, and almost immediately take her back to the campus. She said "Fine! Then don't bother to come get me this afternoon either!". (and hung up).

I didn't hear from her that afternoon, nor did I attempt to call her. She didn't ahve a cell phone and had to call from a landline on campus anyway.

I went home. Still no call from her. 8:30pm, she arrived at home - on foot. It's about 5.5 miles to the campus, and it was February. There is no nice sidewalk along this way - and much of it is unlit roadway where you have to walk on the shoulder. She had stubbed both big toes accidently hitting bricks or chunks of concrete hidden in the tall grass on the shoulder. (One toenail later fell off). She was standing on the front porch ringing the doorbell - because she had forgotten her key. I didn't let her in immediately, but went out the back door and came around to talk to her - to gauge her mood - to find out if she was still in an angry smash-it-all mood.

<AD pauses thoughtfully at the memories>

She was really hurt that I didn't let her in immediately. She walked away from the house toward the road (unlit, 2-lane, semi-rural road, quite busy). I followed, trying to find out what were her intentions. She ran into the road in front of the cars. I had a flashlight with me, was running after her, shining it on her so the drivers could see her. I grabbed her, tugged her out of the road, led her back to the house, opened to her.

She said "AD, you represent the love of God to me. If you ever stop loving me, I'll die."

<sigh>

-AD

T&L and Neak,

The book came today.

I may be able to start reading it tonight, but if not, it will be tomorrow.

Thank you very much!

-AD

What a responsibility and a privilege you have in this situation. I'm not sure I envy you, though!

t&l

I'm sure she has forgotten (but maybe not), that she said that once. She is much stronger now than she was then, semi-suicidal thoughts are rare. She manages her anger much much better. She's growing. I still believe in her. When I pray, which is not very often anymore, she and DD are all I pray for - that God take care of them - bless them, protect them. Still, even now.

-AD

T&L,

You have mail.

Tina-
I received your “angry” letter today. Of course, at first I was dumbfounded--then I got p------!! I cannot believe that you would actually think that I would use the children to get back at you or your mother.
I notice that you and your mother use the non-confrontational approach to spew out your hatefulness. I was going to call and realized that you would not talk to me.
I think I’m the beneficiary of your being angry at John, here he comes to see the children after he sees -------- (editor’s note: ex-girlfriend and mother of his other child). He mentioned that you were very aloof. I got the feeling that you might be jealous. I know your mother selected John to marry you and somehow if you got control of his children- he would come back to the church, the children and you and you all would live happily ever after. So since his visit, you have had a chance to plot your revenge and make up all that cah-cah about me.
Actually, I’ve always felt sorry for your being saddled with 3 children and deprived of your youth and ambitions. You should have listened to your dad.
You know and I know that it doesn’t matter what I say or feel about you or what you say or feel about me-in six years it is all moot. DS11 will be 18 and will come to uys and then DD9 and DS8. I believe I told you this before so it should not surprise you. Actually when DD9 is 16 she can be emancipated and join us also.
You might not want to fill their hearts with lies or whatever and you might not want to deprive them of any verbal contact with me or their Dad as it could come back to bite you in the rear.
One of the things you did wrong was to have the kids call you mother. Its not like their mom or dad have died so it must create some confusion to the children.
I was horrified to learn you had a padlock put on the refrigerator-when did you learn that meaness? (editor’s note: it is on due to the uncontrollable eating urges the children suffer due to previous trauma. DD9 developed 7 cavities and had to have one extraction in a 6 month period as a result of her compulsive snacking) I’ve read about that behavior in mystery books and heard about it on those police programs but I’ve never in my life known anyone that did it. So if you do it -its OK? But if Biomom did it-then DPS need to know? (Is this a “bite” moment?)
I’ve had 4 children and never once were they deprived of any kind of food. I planted fruit trees, went to Apple Hill, went to orchard, did a lot of canning and jelly and jam making so my children would always have plenty. Even kept the freezer full of meats, breads, cupcakes etc. I made a lot of bread, pies, and cakes. I would buy the 100 lb. sacks of potatoes, flats of eggs, boxes and boxes of cereal-feeding and clothing my children came first-right up there with my love and pride. Plus I worked, never took and child support except when I was dealing with my cancer (6 mths), and many times I worked 2 jobs-even joined the US Naval Reserve and found time to go to college for 5 years. I even bought a house and paid for it all by myself. J
So!! Why are you sitting on your butt-taking aid or whatever. I hear about that crappy food that you feed the kids-I act like its good but I really want to vomit. And why are you selling the children’s Christmas gifts on E-bay or yard sales- that’s a really great message to imprint them with. If you don’t want us to help-then say so.
I re-read my last page and it crossed my mind that you are lazy and having the children is your excuse to not work-am I right? Also-how come you don’t have a boy friend?? Can’t find another “Bad Boy”?
So here we are-Biomom’s married and happy, Biodad and Latest Squeeze and engaged (going to Reno today-so I may get a surprise) and look at poor old Tina-stuck with 3 kids, no man, no fun, just the same old-same old. No one cares- your mom has your Dad, your sister has her husband, your brothers are doing their own thing. So what happens to Tina 10 years from now-no kids, no home, no job, no husband, no education, no build up of Social Security, no build up of retirement-oh well- maybe your mother will support you for your “sacrifices” and you can be a martyr and be called “Tina the Old Maid” of “No Life Tina”. I told you-you should have listened to your dad.
(the next part concerns the letter that my dad sent to CPS a # of years ago, and out of respect for his privacy, I will not reproduce it here)
You should have gone to college but your mother had to use you since she knew your Dad did not want Biodad’s kids there. Also he told Biodad that no way would he allow him to take Susan away from him. That’s why your mother had to move Biodad to the trailor-which she liked to visit in the wee hours of the morning. Your dad knew what your mother was up to. And now innocent Tina enters the picture-as your mother explains-”I’m just picking Biodad for Tina”. Like your dad believed that.
As I think more about your letter I’ll probably write again. I hate it when people accuse me of a falsehood and try to make me a scapegoat for some thing I had no part in.
Another thing-why aren’t you helping the kids with their spelling and math? I sent those workbooks. Biodad thought that the books were too advanced for the kids-so that means they are not getting a full education. Cousin 1 and Cousin 2 love the books and use them all the time. In fact they usually score in the upper 2-4 percentile in the national test.
Other than the refrigerator being padlocked, I haven’t heard of any other abuse. Just so you know- if you physically discipline DS11, DD9, or DS8 or use me as a part of your punishment routine I will call Child Protective Services . Time outs are acceptable.
You may have custody of the children but that does not give you the right to deny them access to their family. Your statement of allowing the kids to see or talk to their family is cah-cah. You should be making every effort to see them reunited any time they want instead of acting like it is a big favor on your part. Do you want to become a manipulator like your mother?

PS. I have every letter that your mother wrote, plus every letter you have written-so be nice for the next 6 years.

Why did you have to start this up? You could have called Biodad-he would have told you I rarely ever talk to the kids because I hate the cell phone.
Now that you have opened Pandora’s Box, be prepared of letters just like all those long-long letters your mother sends Biodad.
If the kids misbehave of want out-it is very understandable-they are old enough to wonder why they are with you when mom’s OK and dad’s OK.
I still don’t know why you were in such a rush for adoption. You had to know that Biomom and Biodad would change. Your mother was always going to see him-she should have been aware of the change. None of it makes sense. Now the kids and victims and being punished for their loss. I don’t even know if you are mature enough to know the damage you are doing to the kids.
I hope you don’t let your temper get out of hand and really hurt the kids. Many times in the news, I read about young women who decided the kids cannot live for whatever reason. I think Child Protective Services made a bad judgment call on this one. I think they should go see the kids and see if they really want this arrangement.


Yikes!!! She's some lady!

Neaksis,

Why take the time to read this tripe twice - or to type in in for our disgust? Just toss it in the trash (or send it to the lawyers or CPS) but don't waste your time responding to it. My vote: Cut her off - cut them all off. Your kids are your kids.

I'm sorry you have to deal with all this mess. 3 kids make a handful - but 2 witches and a warthog on the side make it a nightmare.

-AD

Isaiah 5:20.

Psalms 82:5

ECCLESIASTES 2:14


I wouldn't talk to her either. You can't reason with someone that is unresonable.

I hope it doesn't get to you.

SS

I told AD once on his thread, when he wondered if I was really <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/mad.gif" alt="" /> when I used the emoticon, that I couldn't understand if people really used it to express genuine anger. I think Snarky Pete is much too phlughphee to represent anything serious. For that, you'd need a Wrath of Thor emoticon--a fierce cloud face, perhaps, with lightning bolts coming out of it. People running in terror. Hiding in caves. Not this sissy little fella! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> I just love emoticons. They're like fat punctuation marks. I think they break up long posts and make them easier to read, and to keep your place in the thread. And the sequence I made up for you looked so funny to me I just had to laugh out loud. Oh, well, if we haven't already established that I've got an odd sense of humor, perhaps now would be a good time. Here goes. I have an odd sense of humor. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" />

Since there is no Wrath of Thor emoticon, if I'm really annoyed, I will just have to be here what I generally am when people irritate me in real life: extremely polite, very proper, completely humorless, and ostentatiously-dignified in my manner of speech. Trust me. You'll be able to tell!

I've got 1/2 hr. in which to eat my food and do my goofing, so I'm going to skip on to another post. Will get back to the Missionary Gardener later.

t&l

I don't know. Maybe because she thought people experienced in fog and babble would be able to understand just how hard this is to take, and could give a little encouragement and instruction in how to cope? Maybe because letting off a little steam here makes it easier to hold to her determination not to respond to Granny Gargamel in any way? Maybe because she wanted to vent to the forum, not to the witch? By the way, I like 2 witches and a warthog as a description. Very clever, and devastatingly accurate, too. Not polite, I guess. Not showing the love of Jesus we are to display to our enemies, but I like it anyway! Hey, I never said I was a nice person. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" /> Obviously, at least in my thoughts, I don't always take the moral high road either...

I think she should go to CPS, too, before they can make any trouble for her. Pre-emptive strike. That's MY motto. Get your story in and on record before the other guy can tell his. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" /> I don't have time to deal with this right now, but oddly enough (and sadly enough), this situation is part of the Saga, and the reason I mentioned earlier that I feel so guilty about how Neaksis' life has turned out. It's one of my Life Lessons from the Saga of OtherSusan the Stupid. Maybe I'll tackle that one next, as soon as I can, since there's no particular order in which the Lessons have to appear, and right now this situation is a particular thorn for all of us.

Is there any money in being a hermit? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" /> Anybody hiring?

t&l

P.S. Well, back to work. At least my pt. is nice, and the doctor is nice, so it could be worse. My delivery earlier kissed my hand, and said she couldn't have done it without me. Made me get tears in my eyes...after several snipes this afternoon at my character by HP, plus this blistering load of lies from Gargamel Granny, being appreciated like that just blew me away.

The reasons I typed it in were two-fold. I wanted to send it to my mom so she could read it (So she read it here, oh well, that's how we do most of our communicating these days anyway), and I wanted to email it to some church members so that they could pray about it.

Plus (this is the super secret part) I wanted someone to go poor, sweet baby after going through the trauma of getting it.

There, now you know

I have no intention of legitimizing her hysterical rantings by responding to her and am planning on asking the advice of my social worker later on today as to what my course of action should be.I want to have all my protective measures in place before things get really ugly.

What IS it about this thread that entices the members of this family to confess their innermost embarrassments to the whole blasted world? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" /> Honest to Pete........... <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" /> Arg-g-g-g-gh! I give you plausible deniability, and then you have to go and tell the TRUTH!!!!!!!!!!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/mad.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/mad.gif" alt="" />

t&l

and then you have to go and tell the TRUTH!!!!!!!!!!!

It's how she was raised - even I can figure that one out. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />


W and I are back from our trip. I don't remember if I said anything about being gone, but it's good to be back.

It is a rare person indeed who can get a letter such as that one and not come unglued. Of course approaching it calmly is also the best way to solve the problem, and get her out of the loop, so I applaud your doing it this way.

I agree with Ad - it is far better for the children to have NO CONTACT with anyone who could, and would write something like that awful letter.

I hope this chapter closes quickly so you can get on with the more rewarding phases of your life.

SS

You didn't say, "Poor sweet baby..." <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />

t&l

AW, I laughed out loud at your military vows. I don't think they'll actually be "picked up" and used officially, though. That much truth all at once might scare too many people off! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" />

t&l