Tales! We want Tales! Especially tales of exotic places.....and any where other than work is exotic.

Is prison exotic enough for you?

t&l

well ..??????

tapping foot waiting for the story ...............

waving madly <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" />

Sitting on the side of the highway waiting to catch speeding drivers,
a State police officer sees a car puttering along at 22 MPH. He thinks to himself,
"This driver is just as dangerous as a speeder!"
So he turns on his lights and pulls the driver over.

Approaching the car, he notices that there are five old ladies -- two in the front seat and three in the back -- wide-eyed and white as ghosts.

The driver, obviously confused, says to him, "Officer, I don't understand, I was doing exactly the speed limit! What seems to be the problem?"

"Ma'am," the officer replies, "you weren't speeding, but you should know that driving slower than the speed limit can also be a danger to other drivers."

"Slower than the speed limit? No sir, I was doing the speed limit exactly 22 miles an hour!", the old woman says a bit proudly.

The officer, trying to contain a chuckle explains to her that "22" was the highway number, not the speed limit.

A bit embarrassed, the woman grinned and thanked the officer for pointing out her error.

"But before I let you go, ma'am, I have to ask, is everyone in this car okay?
These women seem awfully shaken and they haven't muttered a
single peep this whole time," the officer asks

"Oh, they'll be all right in a minute officer.

We just got off Highway 119."

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/pfft.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/pfft.gif" alt="" />

[color:"blue"] "We all get heavier as we get older because there's a lot

more information in our heads."

So... I'm not fat, I'm just really intelligent and my head

couldn't hold anymore so it started filling up the rest of

me!

That's my story and I'm sticking to it. [/color]<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /><img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /><img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /><img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /><img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

t&l, resident [censored]

Well, I'm working on having a better night life. I laid in bed last night for hours trying to picture how you would train dynosaurs to eat M&M's out of the toilet (hoping I would dream about them).

Gosh I'm tired today.

Well B

no wonder ... you probably actually need to eat some M&M's BEFORE you go to bed to get in the dream mood!!!

Maybe a LOT of them.


TL, I still wanna know the 'prison' story ??? Hmmmmm??



<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Funny you should day that...

I got up this morning a bit ealier because it was raining outside and I needed to drive my DD to the bus stop for school. Anyways, as I was standing at the commode, I looked down at the floor and noticed the big red and purple plastic T-Rex staring up at me <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" />

My 3YO boy has finally gotten potty trained and last night before his bath he sat down and placed his dinosaur next to the commode and left it there.

Kids are so cool.


FN

I'm thinking you'd either need a really LARGE toilet, or some very small dinosaurs. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" />

We could loan you Neaksis' kids for a day or so. It seems to work for her. Or you can just try pizza and peppers at bedtime. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" />

t&l

>Or you can just try pizza and peppers at bedtime.

Mole enchiladas, Believer! Or Mole Chicken....had that at my wedding dinner.

The dreams were great that night.....................

Did you check your cupboards? Are you missing any M&Ms? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

t&l

P.S. Hi, FourthNail. Welcome to the feminine hygiene products aisle. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" /> I've seen your posts and wondered what your name meant. So, now that you've popped in, what does it mean?

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /><img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /><img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /><img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /><img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> It was your wedding night!!!!!!!!!! Are you sure it was the Mole enchiladas and Mole chicken that did it?! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /><img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /><img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /><img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /><img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />

t&l

Well.............................................

Its....just....well....(blushing).......I KNOW BELIEVER LOVES MEXICAN FOOD!

It's worth a shot, eh? I mean even if good mexican food doesn't = great dreams, at least she had a good dinner!

(hehe)

First off, it feels kinda weird posting in a feminine hygiene thread, but these ARE weird times.

A few years back my pastor gave a sermon on how Jesus built a bridge between man and God with two wooden planks and three rusty nails. In that, he mentioned that had those nails not been there, his love for us would have kept him on the cross. Therefore, I... am the fourth nail.

I also named my graphics company 3 Nails Graphics and FN's been my screen name for years.

...and knowing is half the battle!

FN

Believer, since it's that rotten Neaksis' fault for ever bringing up the dream with the M&M-eating dinosaurs (although she never did get around to the part of escaping from something or other, and having to leave the dogs behind--but she could still take the dinosaur? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" />), she's really the one responsible for your fatigue. I think she should have to come over to your house, as soon as she's done making blackberry cheesecake for the church potluck tomorrow, and clean and cook for you now that you're all worn out. No lengua, though. I don't think it would taste so good after the cook looked at it in the pot, and threw up on it. (Honestly, those delicate vegetarians! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /><img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />)

AW, I'll get to it, but probably not this afternoon. I've got to balance my checkbook, make a deposit in the bank, pay bills, and at least wash dishes. I'll tell you about my last day in HI, and then we can move on to another story. Luckily for me, this one isn't quite so introspective, and I can stay out of that dang shark-infested Pool, but it's every bit as convoluted and confusing...and I still don't really know what happened, and might even have to fear for my life if I tried to find out.

t&l

Oopsie! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" /> How much over-weening self-esteem do you have to have to think what you say is so important it has to be posted twice? I have NO idea how I did that. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" />

t&l

>gazorninplat

Are you certain this is spelled right?

I want blackberry cheesecake.

FN--That's a very nice word picture of the cross. I can see why you like it. Considering how many of us there have been in this world's history, it's a whopping big nail, isn't it?

Don't worry about the feminine hygiene products label. 1st, it doesn't really mean anything significant. Pep gave it that name once long ago after I made a teasing comment to my daughter, Neak, about her not needing feminine hygiene products or prophylactics when I got to the store, now that she was pregnant again. I was just glad she didn't name it the prophylactics thread, especially since the name was left so long that now it can't be changed any more and we're stuck with it!! Even after the baby died and the pregnancy ended, the name has remained. What can I say? It's an eye-catcher, anyway. 2nd, there are other men who post here. SS is on vacation right now. A_D got divorced and doesn't come around so much any more. Aussie, 2Long, and Lemonman have posted, that I can remember. I'm sure SS feels lonely and would be glad to have a little additional testosterone added to the mix, to dilute all this free-floating estrogen around here! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" />

t&l

Well, I don't know what's going on in this thread, but I know I spent last night trying to conjure up a T-Rex by the toilet, and today 4th Nail found one!!!!!!!!!

How do you explain THAT?

Your kid's have outgrown their T-Rex's?

I think I have 1 I can send ya!

And Sonic is giving them away in their Happy Meals right now. (really....red ones)

Believer heading to Sonic for a Happy Meal................

Maybe a prop will help.