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Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1
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Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1 |
absolutely you should tell her mother, then! By not telling people, you are essentially aiding and abetting the affair. It can't survive without secrecy. So don't help them hide their dirty secret. The only thing I would suggest is that if there are any other key people who should be told, that you tell them on the SAME DAY. Get it done in one fell swoop so they can't forewarn folks. IT will make your WS furious, but it will be extremely effective in busting up the affair and making it very uncomfortable. Are there any other key people you could tell, such as his family, close friends, boss?
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1
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Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1 |
p.s. your WS will get over his anger, so don't let that stop you. It is worth the impact it will have on the affair.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 224
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Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 224 |
"Are there any other key people you could tell, such as his family, close friends, boss? "
Yes, but oddly, I know it would hurt him deeply and I am not willing to take that step yet. Am I nuts, or what?
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Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1
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Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1 |
Oh no, you won't hurt him, you will be hurting the AFFAIR. He is hurting himself - and your marriage - all on his own and you are trying to stop that.
Anyway, that is the most effective way to end the affair. Take it or leave it.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 224
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Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 224 |
Thanks Melody. And feel free to skip my poll, since your answer is quite clear! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />
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