told her that H was at MY house a few weeks ago for hours and he has been calling me several times...OW was upset that he was at MY/HIS house for several hours and that he called me several times... <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" />

OK, first of all, the OW is upset cuz MY H is coming by HIS house to spend time with HIS children? And she is upset that MY H called me several times? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" />

AND, I'm sorry, but MY friends have better things to do than to call the OW at work and relay messages to her regarding what my H is doing and where he is...MY friends dont even know who OW is or where she works, yet I get accused of such nonesense of having MY friends calling HER at work...

H said it was info only he and I would know about...like what? He was here for a few hours and he called me? whoopideedoo! Are you kidding me?

What justifies HER getting upset that MY H is at MY HOUSE??? I just dont get that <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" /> OH, she's protecting her turf now? WTF??? ARe you kidding me? She wasn't too concerned with MY feelings when she was screwing my H <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />

Well, this has got to be the MOST ridiculous thing I have ever heard...

I asked the alien if he ever takes the baby on his own? NO WAY? I asked him if she was OK with this arrangement of HIM coming and going whenever he pleases and her living with her momma and him going there etc...

He said he doesn't do anything with the baby, she's ONLY 3 months old...I told him that he did stuff with OUR babies at that age...he told me I was RE-WRITING history!

OMG! This has made my day! I cannot stop laughing now! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/shocked.gif" alt="" />

Ha ha......so things in Affair land are coming apart at the seams.....now that's just a damn shame....LMAO!!!!!!!!!!

Good for you hon, that you are able to laugh about it.

It appears that she dislikes the taste of her own medicine, go figure.

My husband has accused me of having friends call the FOW and call her names like *whore* etc.....LMFAO, I've NEVER asked anyone to do that...I'm so sure, like I couldn't call her a whore myself. I simply said "Hmmmm well it appears that she has more enemies than me, eh?"

-Caren

Craziness at it's best. So you can cause an LB to the A w/o even lifting a finger! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" /> Great job!!!!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" />

I recall the OW told my then WS that I was calling her home and harrassing her. I was busy working and didn't have time for that nonsense. Oh yea, I was also busy posting on MB at night so there.... no time. I told the WS that those claims were bs but thanks for the idea. LOL!!!

I sense a panicking OW who is picking the wrong card to pull. See this kind of craziness will now cause a riff in their A relationship. The OW is showing her desparate crazy side more now and trust issues will come to the top in a big way.

This is all in your favor BTW, even with the D in process. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

take care,
L.

L.

Ahhhhh gotta love poetic justice, don't ya?

-Caren

Just what is wrong with someone telling her that? Is he lying to her about his contact with you?

Gee,makes you wonder if the WH is doing what he used to do to YOU- playing you against her to freak her out and manipulate the situation for his ego.

This guy really is unbelievable.

To me this is a prime example of why a relationship based on lies and deceit is usually doomed. Once the BS removes themselves from the chaos the A partners have created, the A partners start to feed upon themselves for lack of no other target. Hilarious!

Now you know those OW are just territorial wolves.Well,I take that back,it's an insult to wolves(lol).They are territorial and heaven forbid if the WS has anything to do with his family/children.They figure once they have the MM/MW that they should sever all ties with them forever for the selfish beings that they are.

I asked my WH once if the OW knew if we had been having sex again after the A was found out and I was trying Plan A and trying to meet needs and it was actually after our first supposed NC.He said he told her but I don't think he ever really did.My WH was quite adept at trying to keep both relationships going so as not to blow one for the other.I believed him at the time though being so hurt and confused but now,I would have found a way to give proof and give it to OW.I'm sure that never goes over well,when a WS is still intimate with their own BS.OP's feel betrayed as if that isn't the most sickening, demented thing. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />

Are you still moving ahead with the D?

O

Sad...very sad... FOR THEM!

WH asked me 'have you been calling OW and hanging up'? Yea, in my FREE TIME! No, and I am not going to go down to your level and begin doing that.
WH 'Are you sure? Because now that you know the number someone has been calling and breathing into the phone like they are having sex'
I couldn't help but laugh. I told him with all of the enemies that OW has made, I couldn't begin to guess who it was.

MF4Me... Horrible! He is obviously lying to her...nothing new though right?

Danielle

THANK YOU!!!! I have NO IDEA what he is telling her and I really dont care! I mean, for her to get mad over THAT?? I wonder if this person told her that he begged me yet again to comee home to work on the marriage? And if they told her he tried to shove his tongue down my throat <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/shocked.gif" alt="" /> and that he said he missed me so much and he wasnt' at all happy with her! I wonder about all that <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />

You know, it really is pathetic...this whole thing...I mean, look at this guy...a successful Doctor, and nice family, a nice place to live...he is REALLY moving up in the world...he is now visiting his GF at her mommas house, sleeping in her bed with momma right in the next room...this is stuff I did when I was a teeny bobber...well, I never slept at my BF house, but went there when his parents were home!

I think Orchid is right...OW is panicking...God forbid MY H come to visit HIS kids...

I wonder if I should call her and tell her H called TODAY and asked to come in the house...and hinted he wanted to reconcile...AGAIN <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> I think if he asks to come in again when he drops the kids off, I'll let him know that it isn't safe as someone might tell his GF he was here...we dont want her to get the wrong impression that he is STILL married now do we! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />

OG, you bet, I am going on with the Divorce! YIPPEE! I am so looking forward to my single life! We are so happy right now..the kids are adjusting and so am I...I love being single...NO ONE to answer to..I can do what I want...when I want...

I am also going back to school <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/shocked.gif" alt="" /> Ill be the OLDEST one there I am sure! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" />But I am going to have fun! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

I keep trying to think of any one of my friends who would call that woman...NONE of them have the time of day to do that, much less would resort that sort of childish behaviour! This has got to be a joke! I mean really? I am just sitting here laughing at this nonesense!

They realy do live in their own little world...oh and H kept asking what I was doing, if I am happy, and so on...I just told him "that is none of your business"...he didnt' like that one...He made a point to tell me all his business...I finally just said, "you know, unless you ahve anything to discuss re the kids, I really dont care about what you are doing" he just cant get over the fact I am moving on! idiot! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />

****Applause,Applause****

I just LOVE the way you are thinking now MF! Love it! It took time but you got there.I'm proud of ya~

O

When Doc/Dad is visiting his sons ... I guarantee she's doing 'drive-by' duty!

Know what else? It wouldn't surprise me if he had another OW in the wings... one who does not have pregnancy weight to lose and does not have an infant attached to her nipple all day long.... oops .... adultery isn't so much fun with a crying infant at 3AM ..

whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

sexy, no?

~LOL~

Pep<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" />

I also was accused of calling OW. I wasn't but I couldn't figure out who was making it up--OW or WH. I recognized it as a fact finding mission. I played it and played it well. Never did figure out if WH was baiting me or if OW was baiting him. Didn't matter to me though, because I knew to expect it and was prepared for it.

I played the hand they dealt, and I played it well--the gift that kept on giving LOL.

MF4M, Orchid's "pray for a clear mind and calm heart" motto was my mantra. If you can keep a clear mind and a calm heart it will make a world of difference when you MUST deal with their chaos, and it will make of world of difference when you don't. Either way you win, and either way they lose.

Take care MF4M, starting with a clear mind and calm heart <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

MF4M-
I'm so freakin' thrilled to hear you are really moving forward and ENJOYING your life! And going back to school! How awesome! I have to wait until next March to get back to finishing my degree, but I know what you mean about being the oldest in class. I was called "Big Momma" in my classes. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Well, at least your STBXH's delusions are entertaining. I'm having a good cackle over them right now. Of course now that he can't get what he wants out of you he's making sexual advances. He had that chance and he blew it like the moron he is.

You stopped the cycle of madness. BRAVO TO YOU!

Hey Pep...Now you KNOW this OW is NOT breast feeding...that would put a damper on her love life <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />

Well, the alien called a few minutes ago to tell me he was here to pick the kids up...then proceeded to ask me if I was changing all the credit cards over to his name...hmmm, not a bad idea <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> but NO I am not doing that..it states in the divorce papers NOT to change anything over or move anything...

He then proceeded to tell me how much he misses me and how he is having such a hard time finding a new house...BARF! I told him I have no interest in hearing about this stuff!

I asked him though if the person who is caling his GF told her that he tried to shove his tongue down my throat and begged to come home to "work on the marriage"...he said probably...then said "someone called her again yesterday"

REALLY??? how interesting...he asked if ***I*** was calling her! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/shocked.gif" alt="" />Are you kidding me? Oh yea, I have time to call her and tell her what MY husband is doing!

hehehehehe...I told him that I know he is very happy with her and he was so happy with his new life, etc etc...He sarcastically said something like Oh yea, I am really happy...sitting in K*******, watching TV and listening to a screaming baby al night long...Oh yea, I'm REAL happy! While my wife and family are living in this nice house and having a grand ole time...Oh yea, life is GREAT!

Ok, now just 2 weeks ago he ws telling me HOW CUTE the baby is and HOW GOOD she was and how everytime he walks into the room she just smiles all the time...and she is soooo happy...NOW she screams all th time and is really fussy!

Things in fairytale land not sooo peachy anymore darlin??? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />

Why does he do this crap? Why does he call me up and tell me how much he misses me and how he does love me and how he wants to try to work things out...ARGH! He is such an idiot! His voice repulses me!

And why is the OW so upset that her MARRIED BOYFRIEND is having a good time with his kids or even at the house...which btw he does not come in here when he picks the kids up...he WANTS to, but I wont even open the door enough for him to see me! Am I just dillusional? I mean, does she really NOT want him to spend any time with his kids...OH, I should invite him over for dinner one night so we can "talk" see what that does to fairytale land! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/pfft.gif" alt="" />

Orchid: I know this response is for Pep but I can't resist. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Ok MF4M, here's where you start to get some relief knowing that A just doesn't have the attraction it once had. I mean how long can a guy like to play in the mud before the bugs start to crawl on him and the infections set in. YUCK!!!

The A is headed down hill......


Orchid: He is reaching deep to get you to keep giving him info. His A is suffocating without your input even on stupid stuff. Be wary. At this point it m/b better just to give very short answers and watch the WS in him wither away.


Orchid: Good. This is anti-WS and Xws progress. C/b hard to hear if it makes you angry. Hold your tongue though. A bit of RB could help.


Orchid: Notice how he did not answer your question? The WS brain is scrambled. A simple look response like you are questioning his sanity s/b sufficient. Maybe a short rephrase of his statement would work. I did that as part of my reverse babble. The WS had a hard time turning my words against me when the only thing coming out of my mouth to him were his own words. LOL!!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/pfft.gif" alt="" />


Orchid: Good.


Orchid: I gave my WS a similar line. Then I reminded him of how bad he said I was. Got him to apologize for those charges and then he couldn't use them against me anymore. But I could remind him of his very words when he would start to babble.

In your H's case, reality is setting in. Remind him it is his choice to be there enjoying less in life.


Orchid: Yea well time doesn't count in WS land. Their mood changes by the minute at times. I even asked the WS what was the OW giving him or what kind of drugs was he taking? He looked puzzled and I said, weel he is now sooo moody, was wondering if her teas or other drugs were affecting his state of mind. LOL!!!! It gave him something to think about AFTER he left me. Later he came back and said he wasn't taking any mind altering drugs, so I sweetly looked at him and said then whose to blame for your mind altering attitude? You don't live here so it can't be us. LOL!!! He left with more food for thought. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" />


Orchid: YEP!!!! [email]YIPPEE@!!!!!!![/email]


Orchid: Because he is a WS and the H in him is fighting for his life. There isn't much you can do but use your time and energy to destroy the WS so your H has a chance for survival.



Orchid: Play it cool. He isn't really hurting yet. Let him really FEEL the pain of the A. It will help his recovery last longer. When a BS jumps in too soon to 'fixit' the WS tends NOT to learn well. Remember it is your H you want back NOT the WS.

take care,
L.

What are the odds that OW is checking his phone records and where he's going? I suspect the "phone call" was a cover story so she can "bust" him and not give away that she's snooping.

Dobie

MF4M,

I doubt that anyone who has followed your story is surprised by WH's actions. There is a BIG difference between him being an involved father to your baby boys and playing house with a baby doll now. I doubt that anyone is surprised by his complaints when the baby brings a dose of reality into his fantasy.

Be careful ok? Your WH is getting desperate for contact with you again. Don't bail him out--he MUST bail himself out if you ever want to see your H for any extended length of time. Let him play house for as long as it takes.

Don't be his fix of his "wife who is a good, loving, competent mother of his children" when he needs a break in order to continue enduring the reality of the other situation while putting on a happy face. Let him experience it--after all, didn't he claim he "deserved" to be able to do that? LOL

Take care <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

I know you are proceeding as planned with the D. I think that is a wise move. You really have no need for further chaos in your life and the lives of your boys. I am glad you are doing better.

Your WH should be fully aware of what would have to happen in order for any future with you...if it is even possible anymore. Each time the bar should have gone up. I would think he would have to sell his practices and relocate to SAT or at the very least set up visitation/support with the baby and have absolutely NC with OW ever again. Or, have no contact with the baby as well as OW and, of course, that nursing home, and just pay support for the baby. Something much more difficult for him than any other time. Something he is just not willing to follow through with, unfortunately. He has lacked an understanding of commitment and fidelity. He has continually proven himself to be a selfish, narcissistic, lost man. Somehow, the word 'man' doesn't even fit him.

He is certainly beginning to reap what he has sown....it isn't pretty.

I dont have much time right now...but just wanted to comment on what I could for the moment...This is not possible as his cell phone is in MY name and only I can get online...also the carrier does not update the phone calls in "real time" as did his previous carrier...so I have to wait until the end of the billing cycle to see what calls he has made...and by that time, who cares! haha! There is NO way she can have access to his phone, unless he has left it lying around in her MOMMAS house and she picks it up and snoops around on it! But he does not call me at all and neither do I! call him that is...

I honestly think she is making this all up to get a rise out of him or maybe to admit to something...I dont know...or maybe she IS doing a drive by...but he has not been in this house for weeks...he WANTS to come in, but I wont let him...she's just a little immature brat who thinks that her BF should cut off all ties with his family...and that is not going to happen...

I will come back in a bit and respond to the others...I just bought a lawnmower to mow the backyard <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/shocked.gif" alt="" /> and I have to put it together! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/tongue.gif" alt="" /> This ought to be real fun! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" />