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Kids just got home from bowling alley and D informs me that WH is going to try and transfer son to another school. I know son wants to go were his cousins go . I tried today and school won't do it. So now WH is gong to go and use his sisters address to move him... Now do you think he discussed this with me? of course not he is going to do it without asking me. Not that I don't want son to change schools but how dare he decide this without my knowledge.
I have another thing to ask I was planning on packing the rest of his clothes up and taking them to his sisters. Should I do this or jut leave them here? If I do it then it gives him no reason to want to come get them. or will it just make things worse and he think I want him gone forever? What should I do ????
BS (Me)- 47 WH - 46
Married- 24 yrs
3 children 15,19,22
2 grandsons
D-Day- June17, 2005 while I was 1400 miles away
WH living with OW since July 05
WH filed divorce papers Dec. 22, 05
Divorced granted June 28, 06
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You need an attorney who can draw up papers regarding $$$ and kids.
ASAP
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I know pepper I have been to a few and they want money I don't have. And legal aid says I don't qualify.... So I am kinda stuck, I have asked family for the moeny and none of them have it either......
BS (Me)- 47 WH - 46
Married- 24 yrs
3 children 15,19,22
2 grandsons
D-Day- June17, 2005 while I was 1400 miles away
WH living with OW since July 05
WH filed divorce papers Dec. 22, 05
Divorced granted June 28, 06
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Posts: 27,069
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Have you noticed that your WH comes up with another crisis about every day? Taking you off the insurance, moving son to another school? I think he is reacting to Plan B. I would go darker.
Also I would get to the courthouse and see if you can put in your own papers for temporary support. Somehow you must get financial support from WH.
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Have you noticed that your WH comes up with another crisis about every day? Taking you off the insurance, moving son to another school? I think he is reacting to Plan B. I would go darker.
Believer is right ya know.
Also I would get to the courthouse and see if you can put in your own papers for temporary support. Somehow you must get financial support from WH.
There are legal forms available online and in bookstores.
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If you apply for welfare, and at the same time state you need welfare because your WH has financially abandonded the family ... they will garnish his wages ... something to think about for future reference.
Last edited by Pepperband; 08/25/05 10:16 PM.
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How much darker can I go without moving away ????? I have already stoped talking about him or anything I do with people who talk to him.... I hear what your saying but explain much darker to me ......
I will call courthouse tomorrow
BS (Me)- 47 WH - 46
Married- 24 yrs
3 children 15,19,22
2 grandsons
D-Day- June17, 2005 while I was 1400 miles away
WH living with OW since July 05
WH filed divorce papers Dec. 22, 05
Divorced granted June 28, 06
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Posts: 35,996
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also ... get info about applying for welfare ... seriously ... it is a bracing reality check your WH needs.
Last edited by Pepperband; 08/25/05 10:18 PM.
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Oh I will do that ...... he does give me money but not enough for sure .....
BS (Me)- 47 WH - 46
Married- 24 yrs
3 children 15,19,22
2 grandsons
D-Day- June17, 2005 while I was 1400 miles away
WH living with OW since July 05
WH filed divorce papers Dec. 22, 05
Divorced granted June 28, 06
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Posts: 27,069
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By darker, I mean not responding to his latest drama, whatever it is. Don't even discuss it with your kids or relatives, because it gets back to him, and he knows he is getting a rise out of you.
But get the financial thing figured out. Welfare is good too.
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Ok I got ya ..... so if he transfer son just let it go ??? I don't have a problem with him doing it, I wanted to do it myself but school said no..... So actually its ok, I just felt he had no right without consulting me first ...
BS (Me)- 47 WH - 46
Married- 24 yrs
3 children 15,19,22
2 grandsons
D-Day- June17, 2005 while I was 1400 miles away
WH living with OW since July 05
WH filed divorce papers Dec. 22, 05
Divorced granted June 28, 06
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Posts: 27,069
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Well, when you get right down to it, he should have consulted you before he got involved with FleaLady.
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very true .....In fact he was driving her car tonite when he brought the kids home... D says mom OW's car is really nice... But her brakes squeal like yours does .... He always hated driving our car which is a nice car its a Cadillac but its a 90 model.. She has new car a bonneville or something like that , and he thinks he is hot poop driving that car... In fact about 4 weeks ago he drove over here in it and was talking about how nice it is and so much better than what we have,,,,, How nice for her , but at least we paid for ours not had a sugar daddy pay for it....
Wonder how WH feels driving a car her sugar daddy pays for every month?????
BS (Me)- 47 WH - 46
Married- 24 yrs
3 children 15,19,22
2 grandsons
D-Day- June17, 2005 while I was 1400 miles away
WH living with OW since July 05
WH filed divorce papers Dec. 22, 05
Divorced granted June 28, 06
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Posts: 3,609
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Posts: 3,609 |
I just thought of something. WH knows son has been wanting to transfer schools. Well I tried today to no avail. So I figure he is going to do this his way and make himself look like the Knight in shining armour. This way he can look good to S. Wouldn't ya think his armour would be a little rusty now for all the saving he has been doing this last week???? First OW and how mean everyone was to her and now this, who is he gonna save next ??????
BS (Me)- 47 WH - 46
Married- 24 yrs
3 children 15,19,22
2 grandsons
D-Day- June17, 2005 while I was 1400 miles away
WH living with OW since July 05
WH filed divorce papers Dec. 22, 05
Divorced granted June 28, 06
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Posts: 27,069
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I still think this is being done to engage you. He is realizing that "something" is wrong - he's not getting his hurting fix. So he is making rash decisions to do something. Change the insurance, change son's school, who knows what it will be tomorrow? Yikes, you better rest up tonight, girl.
I would continue on your path, cleaning, doing the yard, arranging financial support. Don't even flinch. When he gives up getting something out of you, he will start wanting OW to meet all of his needs. And that won't be pretty.
Trust the process here. You would think that now that he has his cake, he would just disappear off the map, living in happy bliss. But he still needs you to engage with him. Don't do it.
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I won't believer. I am staying strong here . Well it was not me he said anything to about school was D. As long as I don't respond to any of this , will he give up trying to engage me? Is it possible that he will just give up because he figures I have moved on and don't care anymore?
BS (Me)- 47 WH - 46
Married- 24 yrs
3 children 15,19,22
2 grandsons
D-Day- June17, 2005 while I was 1400 miles away
WH living with OW since July 05
WH filed divorce papers Dec. 22, 05
Divorced granted June 28, 06
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Posts: 27,069
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Come on, you know that he knows that anything he says to kids gets back to you. He may realize that you mean business if you continue being strong. Then he will be forced to turn to OW to meet all his needs. She will fail.
He won't figure that you have moved on and don't care. He knows very well what he needs to do to restore the marriage. He just is unwilling to do it - yet.
Stay the course. Get some sleep, and get ready for tomorrow's newest "problem".
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Ok believer your right. I am tired and bed is what I need ... I guess if he does know anything to be true in all of this , its that I want our M to work and I do love him... That may be the only true thing he knows .......
BS (Me)- 47 WH - 46
Married- 24 yrs
3 children 15,19,22
2 grandsons
D-Day- June17, 2005 while I was 1400 miles away
WH living with OW since July 05
WH filed divorce papers Dec. 22, 05
Divorced granted June 28, 06
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Put adds up on local bulletin boards to give the junk away. AND . . . . Don't worry about "making him mad" etc. It doesn't matter what you do, he's going to find fault in it. Everything you do and anything you say isn't going to be ok with him, so you may as well get done what you need to get done. I'm saying CLEAR THAT CLUTTER GIRL - Go for it. You'll be surprised what you can "man" handle around and take care of if you have to. It'll give you a sense of accomplishment and occupy your time.
The car must be fixed? Check out this website to see if they have advertising in your area. It is free. craigslist.org. If you are gonna get rid of stuff, may as well try to make a few bucks off of it. You can even put links to pictures or post pictures right on the add. It runs for a few days or weeks, depending on what is done for your area. It is a biggie in CA. Imagine:;[color:"blue"]For sale - large drums.....round barrel type. C/b good for a big BBQ smoker!! Lots more man kind stuff!!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" /> [/color] L.
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Not a bad idea Orchid ..... I will look into it ty
BS (Me)- 47 WH - 46
Married- 24 yrs
3 children 15,19,22
2 grandsons
D-Day- June17, 2005 while I was 1400 miles away
WH living with OW since July 05
WH filed divorce papers Dec. 22, 05
Divorced granted June 28, 06
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