I know , I know ...... But I have to say I was right about one thing. I took d to the bowling alley at 8 pm and low and behold guess who was there and hour early ...... I made D get out of car in the back of the parking lot and took off, because he was standing outside....... Darn am I good or what?????

Hurray for you, HURTING!!

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

ty ty mimi.... I surprised myself by doing that.... Just seeing him from a distance made my heart lurch. I had to get out of there quick ......

I forgot to post earlier I went out with some friends last nite. I had a good time. Anyhow one of my friends got me some flowers just to cheer me up. anyhow my D now has it in her head I am dating. I told her no thats not what happen I was with a group of people make and female just having a drink. She bugged me all day about it. I finally told her look I am not dating I am a married woman and I am not looking for a man. I told her I love her dad and thats that. Well I have this sinking suspision she is going to tell her dad about the flowers and make him think I am seeing someone. I tell ya she plays both ends against the middle. I sure don't need her telling him something like that. Especially when its not true. How do I handle this ????

You are doing the right thing, so I wouldn't worry about it. You have told her the truth, and can't be responsible for what she tells WH.

I thought you were going to stop thinking about him???????

I am trying believer , but after all she has told him that was half truths I was concerned about this..... I don't want her to lie to him..... Lets face it a lie like that could cause me more problems......

You are worried about "what if"

cut it out!

very true pep ...I tend to do that alot ....

Let's get silly

let me tell you about one of the worst dates I ever went on....

I met this Larry fellow when I was waitressing during college. larry was a 'regular'. He asked me out. He picked me up and we drove to town, about 20 miles. Larry starts to smoke a joint while driving. (this was about 1979) I was very inexperienced with pot ... at that time only smoking once or twice. larry asked me if I wanted a drag ... so not wanting to appear UNcool ... I said sure ... so I took in a huge amount ... nearly choked to death .... and about 5 minutes later I was REALLY stoned. Lost in my own paranoid thoughts ... larry did not notice how messed up I was ... He smoked daily (I found out later, right before I dumped him LOL) We arrived at the restaurant and were seated. I started to imagine everyone was staring at me. I was afraid I was going to start screaming at everyone ---> "STOP LOOKING AT ME!" ... instead, I excused myself to the bathroom. Once in the bathroom, I decided to escape through the window over the parking lot !!!!! I shimmied down out of the window and onto a parked car .... then I stood in the parking lot completely lost and confused for I don't know how long ... eventually larry came out and found me ... then drove me home.... this was a first date !!!

LOL ... how's that? are you distracted now?

Pep - Well that sure distracted ME!!!!!!!

It was actually worse than I described.

YOUR turn ... distract with a stupid story.

BWHAAAAHHHHAAAAAAAAAA. Pep, you are cracking me up......... this is serious.

com'on sista .... fork over a story! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/pfft.gif" alt="" />

That was funny.... I am sure at the time it wasn't. Yup it distracted me. First laugh I had all day ......

Ty for the distraction

I don't really have any funny stories but I do remember one from when I was 16 that kinda sticks out in my mind...

I was with my first love, ya know the one that you think you will love forever. Anyway he drove a volkswagoon beatle. I'll never forget it , was a bright yellow one... Anyhow we was at the drive in movies.. Remember those? Well we decide it would be a good idea to have fun in the back seat.... Well sufice it to say not a good idea..... Seems because it was so small someone foot got stuck out the window and next thing ya know the people behind us must have noticed. Next thing ya know headlights were turned on and horns honking.... Ya know how teenagers are... I was so embarrassed ...... So the moral to this story is never get freaky in a volkswagon ..... Sure am glad I am old enough to know better now lol

Like Pep's 1st date, while in college I had a date with a lovely coed I finally got the courage to ask out. A real life Barbie Doll. She was a vision to me. Took her to the nicest Chinese restaurant in town. Having lovely conversation over appetizers, I inadvertantly got a bite of egg roll down the wrong pipe...and it was covered with the spicy hot mustard.

My entire body rebuked the egg roll, so hard, in fact, when I choked, I "blew" chunks of the wassabe influenced egg roll into my sinuses. By now, I'm choking, gagging loudly, eyes are red and watery, and my nose is running like Niagra Falls, and I can't get it under control... I rushed to the bathroom, where I finished the episode, probably sounding like a wart-hog giving birth... then had to return to the table.

Needless to say, the rest of the date was short... and very quiet. Not to mention I could never call her again!

I was so embarrassed about the experience, I've probably only told a handful of friends about it. Maybe now I'm ready to share it with my current friends... LOL!

Busy distraction, hurting.... occupy your mind with something other than your "mess". It makes life more livable...

Best wishes,
SD

I just need to ask some questions this morning reguarding fear And feelings of planb, I want to know if what I am feeling is normal. I am not breaking the plan at all I just need some answers. This is day 6 and I feel like I am going through withdrawl myself,I just want to hear his voice. WH has not tried any contact since Wed. He is following my wishes which I know is good for me, but on the other hand its scary because it makes me wonder if he really does not want to see me or have contact. I am so scared this is going to push him away for good.

Please don't anyone be mad at me for taking about this but I am just scared. I really don't have anyone else to ask these questions to. I have learned that I can't say anything to anyone else because somehow it all gets back to WH.

hurtin, he is having the same feelings you are. Except with him it will get worse as time goes on as he realizes the OW can't possibly meet all his needs. Your absence will help him realise how untenable the affair is. He would never know that if you remained in the picture. Staying in contact does nothing but prolong the affair because he has TWO women meeting his needs.

thank you melody for responding to me. it makes me feel better. D has seen him the last 3 nites and she comes home talking about how happy he seems. It just had me wordering if maybe he really is. But I know your right, how can he be that happy with all he is doing. You just don't give up 24 yrs like that and not feel something, unless your not human....

I just have another question.... When talking about meeting his EN's, explain to me what needs she can't meet. Lets face it she can give him affection, conversation and admiration and of course SF. So what is it he will be missing? I guess this confuses me because those are the things he said he was missing from me. Except the SF part...

family stories
shared history
values
honor
committment
wedding
home
comfort
stability
loyalty
respect
meaning of life ..... (HUGE)

and much much more ....

ty pep for that....I thought I was the only one remembering those things..... you all are a god send to me ...