Tonite I am feeling a little better about it all being gone...

It will all be ok, ..I realized if/when he comes home it can all be moved back in as easy as it went out.....

Hurting - Don't even think about it. His stuff being home or out doesn't make a bit of difference. Mine took 5 truckloads out, plus the stuff I threw in the street. He was in the process of moving it all back in when I went to court to keep him out. Stuff is only stuff.

I know believer your right ... it just made me feel bad... I know it can be moved back just as easy....

Hurting...about the job, if you can do it I say....GO FOR IT.
Sure the people he was working with know he is an idiot. Once they meet you and see the great work you can do they be thinking "What the he!! was he thinking? What did she ever see in him? She is way too good for him! He's such a loser."

I already know all of these people . Most are pretty decent folks... In fact two of them I have talked to since all of this started and told me what a jerk WH was.... One of the guys is married 25 yrs and said to me , You know this is going to blow up in his face just be patient. I know he loves you I can see it when he looks at you ...

I am still thinking about the job ... its not the driving part I worry over. Its all the other stuff that goes with it. It a hard dirty job...

I just think it would be a hoot if you could do WH old job better then he did! Maybe they'd have to send some young muscled labor with you for the deliveries. LOL! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

lol Well I doubt that would happen , he is very good at his job. He was always complemented on it... Nope they don't send help with you ... I would have to handle those cement chuts all by myself.... I have a week to think it over .. seeing how he will still be working there this week ...

Last night was a rough night for me. I walked into the bedroom and nothing was the same. The connection to my H was all gone.

I was putting some clothes up and found a shirt of his that was missed in packing. He collects Taz as well and there is a big one in my bedroom. I put his shirt on it and crawled in bed and just held on. The tears flowed and I couldn't stop.

DD came in my room and saw me and said Mom he will be back I just know it. She tried to comfort me she said maybe you should put som of dad's cologne on taz. I said can't do that he took all of it with him. Not sure that would be a good idea anyway.

When is this going to stop? I know I have to let go but I just can't get past it. I try so hard but everywhere I look something reminds me of him.

DD said that he had said yesterday he wants to take one of our dogs with him on the road. He loves our dogs and misses them. I asked her which on and she said Sasha. Sasha is his little girl and she loves him. I told her I didn't think it would be a good idea. DD said nope he can't take her mom , that would give him a piece of home. He needs to miss home. I think DD is getting it ... She know realizes he has to miss home and us so he can do the right thing.

I hear your pain and understand the hurt very well. But.... you have pull up your boot straps and move forward. I can't say enough times, that once you start doing for yourself other things fall into place. Those WH don't like to see BS succeed without them.

Start putting on a front for the kids and acting happy. Start doing for yourself, doing things that you haven't done before.

Is there some counseling you can get into, maybe some group you can meet with that doesn't cost anything. Check with your local mental health clinic. They might have some ideas. Not that's the saving grace, but it gives you additional perspective. Perspective is what you need. Look at the glass half full, not half empty.

Look around and see how good you have it compared to others, ie vicitims of hurricane. Take time for yourself, give yourself a 15 minutes nap or two during the day and then get on with it. Stay busy doing something.

Go to the park and swing, go to the library and get a few books, volunteer for a group that needs help (occupies your time) and fills a need and you meet new people that you can network with and possibly help with job prospects.

Don't let him take dog on road. Pets happen to be my passion, I do pet rescue. IMHO - WH can't take care of himself, let alone remember to take care of the dog. I know I wouldn't have let WH have any of our dogs/cats/horses. He truly loves them too, but wasn't capable of caring for them.

Ty inautshell ... your words have rung true to me ....I have decided to just that I have to move on and show him I can do this with or without him. I'm tired of crying and I'm tired of hurting because of his actions. I am getting close to the poop or get of the pot point now...

I still want my marriage and him but I refuse to be disrepected anymore and he needs to know that. And moving on will let him know that.

I have not shown any anger in all of this so far and right now I am to the point of anger. I really don't care anymore if he knows it or not. he needs to know I am angry in the right way. What he has done to me has hurt me to the core and I want him to know that to. So far he has seen me as a passive whimp who has allowed him to do this to me.

Well no more, I am done with being a whimp and allowing him to trod all over me. I will not hide anymore in my home for fear of seeing the OW. She is not worth my time or energy. If I run into her so be it but I will get the satifaction of showing her by my actions that I am better than her.

Not saying I won't slip once in awhile and cry or worry but I have got to poop or get off the pot myself and start taking action for me and my children....

If my H wants to come along for the ride he is welcome. but if not then so be it....

Oh yeah he will not take the dog....I will make sure of that .

Dang girl - I say go for that job. Man, that would totally help you pay off some of your outstanding debt and it would keep you busy.

You have been looking for a few months now. This opportunity is basically falling in your lap. You know that you can support a family on that pay too.

You'll never make that moola at the local Walmart or as an office admin.

WOW! I missed it about the job. That's perfect!! Go for it! There's NOTHING about that job that YOU cannot handle!! You see, HE'S working this all out for you.. YOU KNOW WHO...IT'S ALL IN THE PLAN..

Well I went and got the app for the job WH is leaving.... I will take it back tomorrow. I saw WH while I was there but he was outside and I am not sure he saw me.. Anyway I will try it and see what happens.

The lady who gave me the app. had no idea that WH was even quitting. She also had no idea what all had happen. She was shocked when I told her the story.

I talked to my brother and he feels if I get this job or actually any job that things will all fall into place. He says you know WH is watching you for the changes you say are going to take place. So far he has seen some but the job one is a big one for him and he still sees you sitting in th same place as 2 months ago.. He said once you get moving he will see it and everything will fall in place just you see. He also feels once WH goes on the road that all of those memories of our time on the road will start playing in his head and help him realize what he is doing... I told him I know the memories will be there but who knows how it will affect him..


Keep your fingers crossed that this works out for me everyone!!!! The job that is

Mimi : All in the plan ???? Who's plan ??? There are only 2 people you could be refering to so its a toss up between God and WH .... Of course God is definatly involved but I think a way WH is to because he told SIL he would talk to his boss about it and make sure I had a good trainer... So maybe he is part of the plan to .. who knows

THE MASTER'S PLAN-GOD'S PLAN...

Your WH has no plan...

BTW, I'm not going anywhere...

LATER.....

Your right Mimi it is gods plan amd its a good one.... Just hope I get the job.

Glad your staying, I would have missed you .....

Well I got the application filled out. I am taking it back first thing in the morning. I will admit I am kinda scared about this. for one thing I will be working mostly with men. there is only 2 other women work there, one is the office secretary and the other is a driver.

Now I know most of these men and most are married so I am not so much worried about anything happening its just I think I will feel uncomfortable around them ... Plus they all know WH. Obviously WH isn't concerned me working with all these men , but then again he knows I would never do what he has done..... Or does he ?????? (just joking) I would never do what he has done...

I did put on there I couldn't start until the 26th. I would not want to start while WH is still there. It would be just to hard. I remember when WH tried to get me to go to work there last year. I sure wish now I would have done this and maybe I would nt be in this mess. I see so many things now I should have done. Hindsight is definatly 20/20....

I wish I had not been so blind .... I could have saved myself all of this from happening...

Even if we manage to reconcile its going to be so hard .... especially if he continues to stay on the raod... I just hope we get the chance.....

Calm down. Remember LM assured you that your WH will be back. And he is always very cynical about everything.

I hope this job works out. If it doesn't keep on applying. Sooner or later, you will get a job.

Hang in there, and expect more contact before WH goes - IF he goes.

yeah I know LM said it believer.....

And believe me I took what he said very seriously... I just wish I could figure out how he is so sure?

I am going through with this application, and I hope it works out I do .... You know you keep saying if.. that kinda scares me , what if he dosn't and I do get a job there , what would I do if he stays there???? Surely he would not lie about leaving and set me up to get a job where he is ? No he wouldn't do that..... Couldn't do that ...

But I do really believe he is leaving....

My goodness. You are certainly a worrier. You're worse than me.

Don't think about what may or may not happen. It's just a waste of time.

But I think you WILL get a job soon. It's overdue.

I also think you will get your husband back. Stay calm, and stay with your MB plan. You are doing fine.

I do worry way to much, I have always been that way....

I know a job will come along soon, I can feel it.

As far as getting him back I am still hoping but I have to move on just in case.....