I agree, but I feel I'm given the task of healing and finding The magic wand!

We are all here looking for answers, but I really think most of us are looking for the magic wand, that can make everything all better.

The only magic wand is our self, we each hold the key. I like all of you BS, found my confidence shaken and found my self-esteem at an all-time low. Think about that do you want to be around someone who is miserable and unhappy. The answer is no, we all want to be around happy fun people and we are now challenged to do that at a time in our life where it is the hardest thing to do!

We must become the confidante fun loving happy person our spouse wants to be around. Nothing can changes the past, yes we can learn from it and try and make a better life, but we can not live in the past.

My biggest problem is my taker side fights some of my best decisions, wanting my WS to do more and fight for me too. I want her to act the way I do, but that’s not her, I have found out she is grieving as much as I do, she just hides it better, keeping all of her pain inside, think it protects me from the pain that she says she has caused.

So yes, we the BS have the undoughtily task of healing, when we are hurting most. Ironic, unfortunate it doesn’t matter, I know now I must find that inner strength to become the man I was and the one my WS wants. Sure we all have found we have issues and changes that we need to make in our life and we should, but they alone are not the answer.

So I plan to hold on to these thoughts and strive to find my own magic wand, the one within me.