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Joined: Sep 2005
Posts: 111
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Joined: Sep 2005
Posts: 111 |
Thanks, I am doing everything you folks are saying. I am not pressureing her, I am GIVING to no end, I am taking time to workout everyday (the only enjoyment I get), I am focused on my mission everyday when i roll out the gate...etc. As far as i can tell im doing all the right things. I even have a phone session with Dr Harley. I am planning for the future (even though she is unsure of her role in it). What else am I supposed to do. I sucked it up for 3 months prior to finding out, then two months after so far. I am rapidly getting tired of all this. I love her to death, but if she doesn't want to do her part, i dont know what else to do.
BH then WH 24 - me
WW then BW 24
Married - 3 years, together for 4.
Her A started while deployed to Iraq (mid-june), and ended on Thursday, Sept 8th (or 9th?)
In counseling now
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Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 148
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Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 148 |
If her affair is over, it is the first step toward recovery. Make sure she is making no contact with her lover. If this is true, She is going through withdrawl. Withdrawl can take a couple mos. Read the withdrawl section and getting over resentment section on the website. Its hard but hang in there.
Have you already had your session with Dr Harley?
Take care
tryingtogetit
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Joined: Sep 2005
Posts: 111
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Joined: Sep 2005
Posts: 111 |
Just got off phone with Dr. Harley. it really was as good as you guys say. We've had about 10 sessions with MC so far, and none of them made the progress that we made today. Now if only she feels as good about it as I do...
We got cut off (my phone card ran out of minutes), so i didn't get to talk to her one-one. But I think that she atleast knows how much I love her, and how much I am trying to change. I just hope she realizes that BOTH of us have issues to work out, and that most of what he said applies to us both at least in some way.
BH then WH 24 - me
WW then BW 24
Married - 3 years, together for 4.
Her A started while deployed to Iraq (mid-june), and ended on Thursday, Sept 8th (or 9th?)
In counseling now
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Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 474
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Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 474 |
Way to go Ray! You took a serious step in the right direction speaking with Dr. Harley!! You sounds like you are doing the right things and recognize that it takes 2 people to make a successful marriage. Everyone does wrong, but when you work together towards a common goal...your marriage...then you are doing the right thing!!
Keep posting! You will go through ups and downs and this is a great place to be for both!!!
Zorro94
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Joined: Sep 2005
Posts: 111
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Joined: Sep 2005
Posts: 111 |
Thanks, she thought it helped too. we just have to put it to use now.
BH then WH 24 - me
WW then BW 24
Married - 3 years, together for 4.
Her A started while deployed to Iraq (mid-june), and ended on Thursday, Sept 8th (or 9th?)
In counseling now
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