A moment of silence in sympathy for GG. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/frown.gif" alt="" />

Yes, WH learned from the best. Of course, I can't claim to be totally CA-free myself, I guess I was quite the enabler. From this whole situation, I've learned that conflict avoiding is baaaaad and I can face conflict head-on, if I need to (taking WH to court for child support, not backing down when he tried to intimidate me when I wouldn't let him take the kids overnight - and when he stuck his foot in the door so I couldn't keep him out, etc.). Yes, this has truly been a learning experience. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> I think in some ways I am better for it. At least now I know what I want...and don't want...in a man and in a relationship. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" />

Off to check your thread to see what you're up to, GG. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Confused, wassup?!?! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Thank you. How sweet of you to think of me. And I will take that as a compliment. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> Everybody sing: "Go on now go! Walk out the door! Just turn around now, 'cause you're not welcome anymore!"

Yep, I like my land better. Better to be lonely without a loser than lonely with one, LOL. Besides, I'm already doing fine without him, even though I do have to throw out moldy bread all by myself now and I can't reach the stuff on the high shelves. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" />

Hi, MWC. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />
STBXWH = soon-to-be-ex-wayward-husband. He used to be just plain old 'WH,' but he earned himself a few more letters lately. I'm hoping soon he'll be demoted to XWH (ex-wayward-husband). <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" />


Sad but true. He probably wouldn't turn down the sex, if I agreed, but I think my STBXWH just wanted to make me feel dirty, used, and cheap. He knows sex without emotional feeling is not an option for me, and he knows he's the only man I've been sexually intimate with, so he knew I'd be offended by the offer. What a sweet-talker, eh? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/tongue.gif" alt="" />

WH made sure he told me when he left that sex was just 'something fun to do' for him and emotional feeling wasn't important to him. In other words, he'd be able to have sex with just about any woman (as evidenced by his current choice of skankylosaur, LOL). <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/pfft.gif" alt="" />

I hope your MIL stays supportive of you. I know what you mean about WS's choices of affair partners being mind boggling. I guess that's what happens when they get their heads stuck way up in their intestinal tracts.

Good luck to you, too, MWC. I hope everything works out for the best for you. Am I understanding correctly that your WH left you while you are pregnant??? That is truly low. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/mad.gif" alt="" />

I don't know how long it takes to get your trust back. Folks around here say it's possible. Take your time, and I will too. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Sigh...the endlessly amusing and confusing ways of the aliens. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />

I called my STBXWH last weekend to ask him if he could pick up the kids later than his usual pick-up time so the kids and I could go to a family funeral out of town. It was the first time I've called him in months. I thought I should call him, instead of having the kids make arrangements, since it was something I wanted. I don't want to use the kids as go-betweens. Also, I'm not really doing a plan B anymore, just a plan D with contact as limited as possible.

He said a later pick up would not be convenient for him, and also refused to let me take them to his lair after the funeral. Stupid me, I should have known what would happen before I called, but he did say he wants to be "friends" with me. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> The kids told me they just sat in his lair watching T.V. that evening, so there were no big plans that would have been interrupted by me taking the kids to him later.

I asked again if he'd gotten around to filling out his half of the final divorce paperwork. He told me to stop bugging him about it, then said, "You used to be so nice. What happened?"

I thought to myself: WHAT HAPPENED???? Duuuuuhhh!!!<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/pfft.gif" alt="" /> Stupid aliens. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />

Another stupid alien story: The other day I got an envelope in the mail containing a bill forwarded from STBXWH. He had spelled my first name incorrectly, then stuck in the missing letter later. Okay, I do have an unusual first name, but come on!!! We were married for 16 years!! He used to be bothered when people mispronounced or misspelled my name (even though it didn't bother me, being used to it since birth, LOL). It's the mind-warp waves from the mothership again. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />

I used to pray and beg God for him to come home, now I thank God that he didn't, LOL. Gotta love God's nutty sense of humor. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" />

Hi Pebbles.

You do sound good.

I'm filing for divorce on Halloween. Think I should go to my atty's office dressed as a witch? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Alph.

Alph! So good to hear from you!

Hee, hee. I served my STBXWH on Friday the 13th. The lawyer and I still chuckle about it. Alph, instead of a witch, you can borrow my pink feather boa and my tiara (long story, LOL) and go as the divorce fairy!

Replying to myself, LOL. Oh well, the house is full of kids, so I have the time, although I should be filling out report cards.

Another alien story: When he drops DD off at school (where I also teach), he used to leave DD and DS's things in the school office. He is not popular there <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> and has now begun to put the kids' things in my van (still has the alarm remote). I don't really like this. It makes me feel violated that he is "touching my stuff" without my knowledge or permission (shudder, skin crawling).

Anyway, the last time he did this, he cleaned out some old papers I had in the back of the van that I keep forgetting about. How....helpful? What a guy, huh? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />

Pebs, can you get the remote reprogrammed or get the darn thing back from him? Yuck!

Faithful, I'll have to look into getting the remote reprogrammed. It's the kind that has two buttons, one for his truck and one for my van. So...I could still unlock his truck, if I wanted to (which I don't - might catch something off the seats <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/pfft.gif" alt="" />).

I took the kids (mine and the one staying with us this weekend) to the pumpkin patch this afternoon. I always like to find the most misshapen, warty pumpkin (yes, I also like Charlie Brown Christmas trees). It took some time, but we finally found a pumpkin that lived up to my standards of specialness, LOL. My son and our guest (daughter's friend) decided to get funny-looking pumpkins, too. My daughter chose the most symmetrical, lovely looking pumpkin she could find. We had a great time, laughing and being silly.

We decided we couldn't bring ourselves to carve the pumpkins tonight. We are giving them a reprieve until tomorrow. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Now, we are getting ready to watch the Princess Bride DVD we rented. I've never seen it. The kids tell me it's good. We'll pop popcorn, eat candy, and drink soda until our stomachs ache.

Later on, when I am exiled to my room, I have The Phantom of the Opera, a pint of Ben&Jerry's, and some chardonnay (good thing I did one of my tougher workouts today, LOL). That plus my bedroom full of candles and I'll call it a party.

Still have the report cards to do. Have to save some fun for tomorrow. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" />

Oooh, Princess Bride is one of the best movies ever! Enjoy. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

"To the death?"

"No, to the pain."

Excellent movie. One of my favourites.

That sounds very classy, but I'd kind of got my heart set on DD5's long black and green witches wig and glow-in-the-dark plastic warty finger tips.

Perhaps I'll just wear a black suit instead. And not brush my hair. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />

Alph.

So? What'd ya think? This is my favorite all time movie!!

Regards,

BB

The book is really good, too. Look for the Good Parts version. (It leaves out pages upon pages of boring political satire describing what people wore to this or that royal event, or every item Prince Humperdinck packed to take with him on a trip.)

we love the movie...yes, to the pain!

but our fav halloween movies are harry potter! we just finished listening to last book on cd (do that on way to and from school together) and it is awesome! cannot wait for goblet of fire to be out in theaters...and yes, my little fella now has a harry costume...will he be dressing up for premiere night? I don't know...if he wants too...

it's hilarious...he likes me to get out my eyeliner and draw on his forehead a lighting bolt...

Now Pebbles sans bam bam....I have a lovely song for you to learn...It is a horrid disco song but even more horrid when you sing it loudly and with feeling! It is from cher's album "believe"...called "strong enough"..

I learned the words and used to sing it all the time when I was feeling down...very much a millenium version of I will survive I think...ironically my former coworker who incidentally was gay...said he thought I sang it great...said it was even a disco song a gay man would NOT dance to (much love to them btw).

On one of last car rides with xh...about 2 years ago and not fun at all...I flipped it into cd...

MADE MY WH-H I WAS DIVORCING LISTEN TO IT WHILE WE WERE GOING TO SOMETHING FOR MY SON...

"I don't need your sympathy..nothing you can say or do for me...and I don't want a miracle...You'll never change for no one...I know the reasons why...where did you sleep last night...and was SHE WORTH IT? WAS SHE WORTH IT?

cause I'm strong enough to live without you..
strong enough and I've been crying long enough
now I'm strong enough to know...
YOU GOTTA GO.

so you feel misunderstood, baby have I got news for you
on being used, I could write the book,but you don't wanna hear about it...

Now I've been losing sleep...and you've been GOING CHEAP.

SHE AIN'T WORTH HALF OF ME..IT'S TRUE...NOW I'M TELLING YOU..

CHORUS

Come ****** or waters' high...You'll never see me cry..
This is our last goodbye it's true...now I'm telling you...

chorus..
____________________________
this song is bad enough, loud enough to either make yourself dance, laugh (at yourself), and have fun if you're in a yucky mood...or better yet..

PLAY IT IN CAR FOR WS...DO IT SAY ON WAY TO DIVORCE COURT AND JUST HUM LIGHTLY LIKE YOU MEMORIZED IT...

Or have it playing in car/minivan when dropping kids off blasting it out of window so ws can hear it...

be singing it loudly in car when ws walks up to your car door.

It was fun that I made and force my then wh to listen to it...sat humming it quietly beside him...he knew I knew the words...and he also knows I am a singer! actually I've been singing for 20 plus years...and am kinda good.

I liked to plant a horrible fantasy in his head...like I was in a karaoke contest and singing a horrible song about a horrible man...and said "this song is for darth. he is every woman's nightmare. If you want a lying scumbucket, here is his cell number..this is for you>...and I'd sing away.

Incidentally, when I first left darth and kicked him out first time, left and went on cruise to carribbean with my sis and bro in law, my son, and my xil's...for a week.

what did I do? I entered the captain's karaoke contest...and won! sang 2 shania twain songs...One I DID decicate to my wh...said that "this girl is here alone on this cruise ship b/c my h is home and not alone! ..sang song "That don't impress me!"...then followed by "don't be stupid". People were clapping and cheering... three hundred ship board credits! and many margaritas with my sis and bro in law and toys for my son! we had a blast!


I am all for subjecting the ws (ones sooooo bad that we are forced to divorce them) to much pain and suffering..and if we can have fun and laugh while doing it, then it is best...I don't really mean real pain and suffering though..

Oh yes...I changed my mind...yes I do!

Pebbles, glad to see you are doing well, and seem to be v strong.
I'm doing OK. No active contact at all from WS, except him kinda pushing me to sell the apartment.

BTW, I just stumbled upon a file that has OW's address in my computer. I have an intention to do one last exposure to her parents. I had wanted to do so in an earlier instance but didn't know her address. Can you give some advice on what you kinda write to your MOW's parents? How succinct were you?



~A

Faithful, MinM, Brit's Brat, and 'Neak,

The kids changed their minds and wanted to watch cartoons instead, so I'll watch The Princess Bride tonight, after they go to bed, while I'm filling out those report cards I keep putting off. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" />

I did watch Phantom of the Opera. It was an okay movie for Halloween, but I guess I was expecting more music and romance, less Friday the 13th slasher action.

My sister recommended The Sisterhood of the Travelling Pants, so I'll watch that sometime this week. Sounds like a good chick flick. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

Alph, don't forget the plastic warty fingertips. It's important to accessorize properly for such a grand occasion. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

Peachy, I LOVE horrid disco songs! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> I don't ride in any sort of vehicle with my STBXWH any more, but DD does take my CDs to his place and sings along to them, so if his head is not too far up his intestinal tract, he may get the point, LOL.

Your son's Halloween costume sounds cute. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> My DD wants to be a goth witch. DS thinks he is much too cool and too old to dress up (party pooper, LOL). I am taking my daughter and her friend (the one who spent the weekend with us) out trick-or-treating Monday night. DS will stay home to hand out candy with my mom. I am trying to decide on my costume. My daughter might be embarrassed, but her friend will think it's cool that I dress up.

I can't decide if I want to be a good witch (wearing an old prom dress, my feather boa, tiara, and rose magic wand), a cheerleader (wearing my high school pep girl outfit, complete with pom poms), or Madonna circa early '80s (black lace, chains, boy toy belt, LOL). So, what do you guys think?

Speaking of karaoke (and Madonna), my sister wants to take me out to a karaoke place on '80s night soon. She wants me to sing to "Like a Virgin." She says that's my song, LOL. My voice is okay for elementary school teacher purposes, but what I lack in voice, I make up for in dancing. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" /> I used to karaoke to that song and "Dress You Up in My Love" back in the day (at parties, though, not in a public venue). <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" />

Peachy, if you're ever in central Central California, we should go out karaoke-ing (sp?). <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />