arbnlver76,
It sounds way too stupid under the circumstances to say happy thanksgiving to you, what with you being in Iraq & all... let me just say that there IS a light at the end of the tunnel, and here's to better times ahead. I remember making a turkey for my H and an Army buddy when we were stationed overseas on Thanksgiving, and even with each other it just wasn't the same as being home. Thanks for your service, stay safe.

MSA

Thank you everyone for your helpful information and making me see the error in my ways. I truly just want my wife happy. I will try to be that husband to make her happy and want my marriage to work after what I have done. I realize I have a lot of work to do with not only my wife but my personnel self. I appreciate everyones post again and have a great Thanksgiving to you all.

I just want to add one thing to this thread and it is that by pushing your W to have an affair you are setting her up to get emotionally/physically involved with a man who will most likely have less respect for marriage than you had when you had your affair. This OM [other man] could very likely use the same justification that your W used, to get involved with another woman in the future. In other words, you would be helping her to choose a future H with the same broken moral compass as yours. Sure, a BS [betrayed spouse] self esteem takes a nose dive after discovering his S had an affair and many times falls into an affair of his/her own later on in great part because of it, BUT they also find that the so called 'revenge affair' only made things worse. Beleive me, your W's self esteem will be harmed much more after she gets involved with another man. Better to divorce your W, allow her time to heal, and later find a man who not only truly loves her but respects the institution of marriage. Talk again with your W and find a better solution for both than allowing her to have an affair of her own.