Good for you, WAT! Sounds wonderful - 39 months, wow! Any sounds of wedding bells?? Is your ex still with the OM?

I completely relate to the "this is how it's supposed to be" feeling. The only difference is that unlike you, who apparently hit bullseye on the first shot, I have gone through dozens of wrong matches, to the point that I started wondering if I will end up spending the rest of my life alone. Not that the thought scared me, but certainly was not my first choice <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />.

But, having met G, I wonder if all the others were sent my way specifically to show me how bad it can be, so that I would have a greater appreciation for when they send a princess my way. What can I say, I sure do!

Your advice is good, though - I want to enjoy her company and not force anything, get to know her slowly, and see what happens in due time. But like I said, so far, I am in heaven <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />.

AGG

Nay, nay - I didn't hit the bullseye on the first shot.

I had quite a few "first dates" and a LOT fewer second dates. I think that some women were reasonably wary of a guy who had experienced the loss of a son and a cheating spouse in short order. Fortunately my now SO looked deeper than the surface and - somehow <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/pfft.gif" alt="" /> - saw something of value. No wedding plans - just retirement plans.

XW and OM are still married. I have no information other than that, although my son spends a lot of time with them. We just don't talk about what goes on with them. I do get an occasional dose of alien-speak and a "close encounter" - verifying that denial ain't just a river in Egypt. You would be amazed at some of the crap I get. Then again, maybe wouldn't be. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

WAT

How bout an update for an old friend?

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/pfft.gif" alt="" />

I smiled while reading your post, I am so happy for you. I hope things are still going well... I have a story to post soon on here, It's not about me but something I read in a magazine, I hope you read GG. I thought of you for some reason while I read it.

Anna

So what's the countdown AGG? How much longer AND whatcha' got planned? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" />

Anna - how are you, 'ol buddy 'ol pal?? I reckon you are still with J?? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />. Yes, things have definitely changed for me in the past few weeks - going from "I'll be single the rest of my life" mindset to "this is how it should be when it's right!". What can I say, G has taken my breath away, and I am still breathless. We just seem to be totally on the same page, and despite being apart for two weeks, we seem to be getting only more and more involved... Who would have guessed... Anyway, I sure want to read your story, especially since it reminded you of me - no doubt it must be about some good guy, hehe <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />.

DW - "So what's the countdown AGG? How much longer AND whatcha' got planned?" - hmmm, 6 days, 18 hours, 24 minutes, and 12 seconds - but who is counting?? The plan is to get together next Thu and spend the evening together (just the evening, scout's honor!) - or, as she said, to catch up on some "us" time. This woman speaks "Harley" without having ever read it, she is a big believer in the policy of undivided attention. I am too, but I thought I was the only one in LA who did - turns out there is a lovely and wonderful woman in LA who shares the same mindset - and I found her!! I feel so lucky...

AGG

[color:"blue"]You start with a full bag of luck, and an empty bag of experience. The trick is to fill the bag of experience before you empty the bag of luck. [/color]

reads like the bag of experience filled up faster than the luck ran out.

living proof that experience does matter, and just as much in relationships as anything else.

uhm,, can you have a small MB guest table at the wedding?

wiftty

I hope you are right <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />. I have certainly had enough experience to learn how to weed out the bad matches pretty quickly. But, at the same time, I started feeling that my luck ran out (i.e. that ALL I'd ever find would be bad matches). But, this is a numbers game, and with G, I feel that maybe my luck has changed. One other great thing about the experience I built up through dating is that I am now smart enough to know a good match when I see her, and not let her slip through my fingers - and with G, it feels about as good as it can get <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />.


If y'all promise to behave <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />.

AGG

<tip-toeing>

should we be nervous at all... that you are acting so giddy after only 2 dates? You called her your "honey" already? I mean... we want you to have fun... but... we want you to keep your feet on the ground too.... <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" />

My thoughts exactly but I didn't want to be the first party pooper on AGG's thread <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

My thoughts exactly too <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />. I am glad to see you ask this, as I am counting on y'all to keep me honest and safe <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />.

OK, let me answer it this way. Yes, I am totally giddy over G. It has been a long time coming, starting with our very slow and cautious initial interactions by e-mail, where we got to know each other through some serious and deep Q&A exchanges. We compared out personalities, which differed by only one letter (N vs S). We discussed our values, goals, past relationships, family backgrounds, etc. With a couple of very minor exceptions, we seemed to be totally in line on everything.

I was also very attracted to her visually (at least through pictures). That is very important to me <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" />. We then talked on the phone, and the two conversations seemed totally effortless, and lasted two hours each. Neither one of us was pushy or distant. I was having a hard time believing that she could be for real.

That is exactly why I started this thread. I was feeling that G was so right for me, and was realizing that with our imminent meeting, the big unanswered question mark was the dreaded "C" word that I know so well, apparently along with my other male cohorts on this board - Chemistry. Will there be any?? No wonder I was all jittery.

Well, we seem to have chemistry in truckloads. Our second date kissing experience left us both quite breathless, so I think that completed the initial round of questions - we seemed to be off to a great and solid start.

Now, with her being gone for two and half weeks, I was wondering how things would go. Well, we have continued our e-mailing, several times a day, and I am still learning more and more about her and her family, and I am liking her more and more. We still seem to be step in step with "this" whole thing, and I find that very comforting, and, well, exciting. There is no weirdness, no games, just nice, stable, and consistent expression of interest in pursuing a relationship with each other when she gets back. I think that is cool.

While she is gone, I have, several times, scratched my head trying to see if I am missing something, some big (or little) red flag, and perhaps allowing my excitement over her to cloud my judgement. I frankly am at a total loss to find one such red flag. Her family of origin, her lifestyle, her background, her values, outlooks on life, education, recreational activities and hobbies, job, interests, etc, all seem to line up as well as can be imagined with what I am looking for. So, my feeling side is excited about this wonderful woman, and my thinking side cannot find anything to worry about yet.

Does it mean that I am losing sight of reailty? I don't think so. I am perfectly aware that as we get to know each other better, we may discover things about each other that may be red flags or deal breakers. I am not picking out diamonds as of yet. I want to get to know her more.

Still, the facts are that I met her, I like her, and I can't find anything to worry about. And she seems to feel the same way about me. So, yep, I am giddy, she is giddy, but being that we are both thinkers, I think we are (right now) in good shape.

But time will tell, and if things start going funny, you will probably be the first to know.

AGG

Sounds like your on the right track AGG!

If its there, its there. You can't deny it.

Keep your eyes open, proceed with caution, but above all, enjoy!

Karona

Yeah, what K said! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" />

Enjoy the infatuation stage...there's nothing like it and from what you describe, when you both come down a bit, looks like you've got the beginnings of a nice foundation to build on. This is, I believe, how it should start.

DW

Alluring,Your a fine one to talk! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/pfft.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" />

Well said, DW, and this is exactly how I view it. I am only too well aware of how the infatuation stage can cloud a person's view of things, which is why I am probably the wettest blanket on these boards whenever others become too ga-ga too soon <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/pfft.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/pfft.gif" alt="" />. I am doing my absolute best to look past the infatuation, and examine the basics as well. And so far, I really like the "basics", or the foundation, which only makes it feel that much better.

I once went to a seminar where an instructor was discussing the stages of romance, and I remember her statement about infatuation. She said: "Infatuation is a great stage. You should realize that it won't last forever, and once it's over, you'll need to learn to deal with the inevitable Uncertainty and Negotiation, before reaching Acceptance and Intimacy. But yet, Infatuation is the best phase, and you should enjoy the heck out of it. Just don't make any permanent decisions during this stage".

I think I am trying to enjoy the Infatuation phase <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" />, (not too easy with her being 2000 miles away), but I am still well aware that she is not perfect, and I am actually looking forward to learning more about her, until I know the "real" her, and vice versa.

AGG

Very good. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" />

Hi AAG,



The eharmony site works like this. They match you on 29 dimensions. But there are only 500 people in the world that will match you on all 29 dimensions. So their system generates a match at 20 dimensions matched. Now factor in that alot of people probably are not completely honest when taking the test.

Make sense as to why?

What you are probably experiencing is a high 20`s dimension match.

I too received a high 20's match about 11 months ago.
Everything is effortless.
Chemistry is off the charts.
Conversation becomes almost addictive.
Openness and honesty flow naturally.
You think alike and because of this there are never any disagreements.

Making out like a 18 year old in the parking lot on a second date?..lol..

Been there done that.
Still doing that.

Makes sense to me. I wonder what those 29 dimensions are though. Of my initial 300-some matches, the incompatibilites were so glaring and obvious, it made me wonder why they bothered. I am talking about very basic things, like introvert/extrovert, neat/messy, etc. Oh well, like I said, it pays to see the rest before finding the best. I am just thrilled that I stuck around long enough to meet G. I was within a couple of weeks of cancelling when they sent me the match with her.


LOL...Well, with the compatibilites like you described, the result that you described comes naturally too <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />.

I'm glad that you found such a highly compatible match as well. If mine withstands the test of time, I'll look forward to still feeling giddy months and years from now <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />.

AGG

My husband and I didn't meet through any dating sites, but we've been married 2 years now, sure we've had a few issues, but I still feel giddy when I see him and I believe I can speak for him in the same way, that he still feels giddy, as he seeks me out daily for hugs and kisses.

That is great, TR, and it is encouraging to see that it can be done. Something for me to strive for <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />.

AGG

And yes, I am jittery again <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />. She gets back tonight and I'll see her tomorrow.... Will it feel awkward after two weeks apart? Stay tuned <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" />.

AGG