hmmmmmm..... he's not gonna tell us.... <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/pfft.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" />

maybe he's being held hostage in it.... <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" />

Oh, nope, no burlap sack......... <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/shocked.gif" alt="" />

Anyway, we had a great weekend, couldn't have asked for anything better. It feels like we have known each other for way longer than just a month (OK, three months if you throw in the two months e-mailing before our first date). Conversation is great, similarities are all over the place, and we just love each other's company. What's there to complain about?

We bumped into my ex at a restaurant one evening, she was there with her H and our kids. So, in a way, G got to meet the ex "spontaneously", avoiding any stress or anxiety <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />. Also, my kids ran over to us and wanted to chat with her, which was very cute and made G very happy to be recognized that way.

So, no, we didn't kill each other this weekend, not that I expected that to happen. We both just keep marvelling at how all other relationships we had pale in comparison to this one - despite having known each other for so little calendar time, we have such confidence in this that we have no trouble or worries about sitting down and making travel plans (plans, not reservations <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />) for late summer - and yes, in most of my previous relationships, I would have been reluctant to plan more than a few weeks in advance at this early stage. It just feels great to be with her, and still the more I see her the more I want to be with her, and vice versa. Not a bad place to be. So, Laura, if you are reading, don't settle! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />;).

AGG

Ah, so Victoria made an appearance.....gal after my own heart <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" />

Most excellent AGG!

Big smiles over here....so very cool when two people click

DW

AGG,

How exciting for you.

Although, you really do need to have one fairly decent arguement before you decide you want to commit, that way you know how she handles conflict and make sure your both on the same page there as well.

Certainly, her having been in a long term relationship says a lot about her ability to commit, but not everyone deals with conflicts the same way, and it's those type of major conflicts that really test the foundation of the relationship.

So here's to one fairly major conflict so that you can really see how solid the foundation is. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

Glad to hear your weekend went so well!

AGG, I keep reading you tell others not to settle. I have a question concerning this statement.

While dating, did you ever go thru a phase where you were 'numb' to your dates? I guess what I'm trying to say is, just didn't feel or think you could feel?

I haven't figured out if I'm numb to meeting men, or if the guys I have met just haven't tripped my meter.

Thanks,
Karona

How wonderful for you AGG! You must feel like you're walking on air.

All sounds lovely. Time together is the way any questions will be answered, but that you know. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />

May this love continue on it's merry path. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" />

DW:

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" /> Well, without dipping into the prurient details, we actually did behave for the most part. Even before the weekend we set a goal of "waiting" until Valentine's Day, which now seems painfully far away. And we are still sticking to that goal. So there was no burlap, no Ms. Victoria, just plain old flannel, though one night she did somehow end up wearing three items to bed,and that's counting a pair of socks and her smile... But we did behave <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" />.

TR:

Thank you TR, and I appreciate the good wishes. I absolutely agree with you, and I definitely want to see how we handle conflict, disagreements, etc. I noted that she is strong willed (as am I), which is something I like - I know that she expresses her opinions and thoughts, good or bad. So I am not worried about her doing what my ex and so many others did - smile all the time but build a volcano of resentment. So far, every discussion we had consisted of us being very focused on the other person's feelings and needs, so that is encouraging. But I am totally aware that it is easy to be that way when your Giver is in charge, and I will want to see how things work down the line.

And speaking of commitment, I am nowhere near that at this point. While I do not see a single red flag with her and I like her more and more every day, there are a couple of things on my radar screen that I want to see play out in the longterm and see if we are compatible despite them. The primary one, as silly as it may seem, is a pretty significant offset in our sleep schedules - I am a morning person, up by 7 even on weekends, while she is almost nocturnal by comparison, starting most weekdays at about 10, and weekend days around 2-3. I would like to think that we can work out a good compromise, but it is something I am keeping an eye on.

Anyway, this is not something I am worrying about at this point (nor ignoring), and will just see how it works out in day to day life. But in every other way so far, we "get" each other as if we were twins, so it is quite wonderful. And the chemistry is still through the roof, actually getting stronger and stronger, it seems.

Karona
Absolutely. I felt numb to my dates for two reasons - one is when I was not "into" dating - either because (early on) I was not fully healed, or because I had too many other things on my mind for whatever reason. But, more often, I was "numb" to my dates because they were simply placeholders, and I was torn between wanting to be with someone and realizing that I would rather be alone that being with someone but wishing I were alone <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />. Being with the wrong person, to me, is more painful and numbing than being alone. Especially if that person is really into you, and you are not into them. Don't get me wrong, I liked these women, but they simply did not do it for me and I could not, in my gut, see a happy future with them.

So yes, I think I know the numb feeling. I was beginning to think that maybe something was wrong with me, that maybe I became too picky and will never find anyone to be thrilled and excited about, and could see them in my life, and be thrilled about that prospect. But when G came into my life, that all changed, and that is why I keep singing the "don't settle" song - when the right one shows up, s/he will make everyone else look like little leaguers trying to play in the World Series by comparison.

nams
Thanks nams <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />:). Yip, it still feels like magic, and I see no end in sight, nor do I want to...

And wow, today is the first month-aversary of our first date, hehehehehe <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />:). Who would have guessed....

AGG

Karona
[/quote]Absolutely. I felt numb to my dates......I was torn between wanting to be with someone and realizing that I would rather be alone that being with someone but wishing I were alone <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />. Being with the wrong person, to me, is more painful and numbing than being alone. Especially if that person is really into you, and you are not into them. Don't get me wrong, I liked these women, but they simply did not do it for me and I could not, in my gut, see a happy future with them[/quote]

I think this is where I'm at. I have felt the pain of being with someone [however brief it was]knowing they were very into me, and I couldn't return the feelings. Not a good feeling at all! I would say I feel the same, I would much rather be alone than with someone to just pass time so to speak.

[/quote]So yes, I think I know the numb feeling. I was beginning to think that maybe something was wrong with me, that maybe I became too picky AGG"[/quote]

I thought that about myself, but in my defense, I don't know if it's as much that I'm picky, as it is location.
Well, I suppose, due to location, I am picky. Anyway, I hope I'm on the right track!!

I am happy for you and G! Sounds like things are going wonderfully. May we ALL have the same outcome one day!

Thanks for the response.
Karona

AGG, that is just so incredibly sweet and romantic to wait until Valentines. To me, it really shows just how much you are "into" each other and just how much you respect her, and one another. You da bomb my friend!

Man, look at how besotted you are now....can't imagine what post "Valentines Day" AGG will be like <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/pfft.gif" alt="" />

DW

This a rhetorical question, something a gentleman such as yourself would not answer...

Your defination of behave is not similar to Bill Clinton's I hope. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" />

Either way, this is some of the REALLY fun stuff! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

DW:

Aww, thanks DW <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />:). Very kind of you. And I agree, I do see this "holding off" as a sign of our respect for each other. I know some here would consider this holding off period to be quite insignificant in length, and it is, compared to those who want to wait until marriage. But, to me, this does signify something, so I value it as such. Now just need to try and actually follow through, ugh <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/shocked.gif" alt="" />. But if we do make it, I'm looking forward to a great Valentine's Day <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/shocked.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/shocked.gif" alt="" />. I just hope that no one gets hurt, especially me <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />....

nams:

Right, I sure wouldn't <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />.


See above <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />. But, no, it's not <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />.


I love it <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />.

AGG

Hi AGG, Yesterday was the one year anniversary of my match. I thought about your match and wanted to check up on how you were doing.

WOW, does your post take me back in time..lol.. simply amazing how much your discription is to what I experenced.



Same here. I have come to believe that chemistry is nothing more than the "effortless" meeting of EN`s. Exciting and comfortable at the same time.



Yep, its more like you have known eachother forever already. There is nothing,no subject you don't talk about. Honesty and openness becomes truly radical.



These are real hard come by because of the natural communication and conversation. Not one of these in a year for me, I`m still waiting..LOL...



Stay away from. Candles,wine, hottubs, romantic music..LOL
Because you know that SF is probably matched also, as they did a very good job of it for me.

From my compatibility profile. Which I had never seen before. I read it today after seeing other people posting theirs. Its quite fasinating to be able to count up all matchs.

Sexual Passion: Your ideal companion is looking for the surge of physical excitement that comes with falling in love. When she's with her partner, she expects a physical connection that goes beyond compatible personalities and interests. Physical chemistry isn't her only need, or even her main one, but she does want to feel a strong desire for her partner.

Yeah its a match <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" />

Wow, congrats!!!


I think that is true. I cannot remember the last time I wanted to spend all my free time with someone, and this is exactly how I feel with G - and she feels the same. So, things are still going great. Getting better and better every day, actually!


You got it!! Sure sounds like I am following in your footsteps <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />.


Uh, now you tell me... We, uh, didn't quite make our goal <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" />. Well, we decided to call it "practice" - who would want to have a Valentine's Day encounter unprepared and out of practice...?

Anyway, she met my parents yesterday - everyone liked everyone, no big surprise there. My kids like spending time with her, which makes it easier for me and G to spend time together. So, yup, everything is coming up roses so far.

AGG

Ruh roh <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> AGG and G sittin' in a tree...... <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" />

What do your friends think? Bet they love her too. Dunno if you posted it in this thread, about you being a morning person and her not....things like that can be worked around don't you think? I mean, I personally have never encountered that myself, and I think it's cool that this is something you've identified.....I know when I've gone on family vacations, things got a little hinky b/c I liked to sleep in a bit and my extended family were up and at it fairly early and we ended up getting on each other's nerves after a bit.

Very interesting.

DW

Ruh roh is right <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />.


We'll probably start meeting friends next weekend. We are trying to keep a balance between "us" time and meeting kids, parents, etc. But I do want her to meet my friends, and she wants me to meet hers. Which is all good, I think, much better than dating someone and never meeting friends. BTDT, and usually there is a darn good reason for that <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/frown.gif" alt="" />.

As far as sleep, it is still one of those "let's see how it plays out" things. It's not just me, but my kids are also up at the crack of dawn, which is about 4 hours ahead of G's wakeup time <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />. So, we'll have to see how this pattern works out - in some ways, an argument can be made that there is even some benefit in this - I get some alone time with my kids in the mornings, and then we all get "together" time, and then I get alone time with G. We'll see, I am definitely not trying to rationalize this away, just will have to see how it plays out. If this is the biggest issue we'll ever face, I'll be happy <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />.

AGG

I couldn't agree more AGG <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" />

Thanks for the support <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />. And for what it's worth, she has said that she would really like to get to sleep earlier, but has had trouble getting "motivated" to do so while living alone. She says that with me and my kids in her life, she would be much happier shifting her schedule and being part of our routine.

Of course it remains to be seen if she can actually do it and be happy with it, but her attitude (without any pushing from me) makes me very happy <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />. She is such a gem, I have never had so much similarity in outlooks with any previous GF - it's great! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

AGG

I can TOTALLY relate! I am a night owl, but now that I'm single, it's bordering on the ridiculous <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/tongue.gif" alt="" /> I'm up WAY too late for my own good.

AGG, she DOES sound like a real peach, but so do you. Match made in heaven <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" />

Her willingness to try is key as is your attitude that, well if she doesn't take to it, it would be a good opportunity for you to have *alone* time w/ your kids. As we all know, there's no room for rigidity or inflexibility in relationships....

You guys got it going on!

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/laugh.gif" alt="" />
DW

Hi Guy - glad to "hear" that things are still going well. I haven't been keeping up with every detail.

Browsing thru this thread, there seem to be a few vital, potential showstoppers that haven't been mentioned:

Does she prefer sail vs power?

Will she bait her own hooks?

Please don't put this off any longer, OK? Hate to see your bubble burst after so much other (lesser) stuff seems right.