Hi Cliff,

I've been away for a while....

Plan A sounds the goods at the moment.

But be very sure, VERY VERY sure the affair has really ended. I would expect that if NC has been established and she is still in the marriage that after 2 months she would be coming around.

But just do your best to meet her EN's as in Plan A. Be aware of Waitingonlove's thread - he finally discovered that his wife had been in contact again hence there had been no improvement in his marriage after a few months.....

Make sure there is NC.

Hi bigkahuna, as far as I can tell the A is over, she was pretty good at keeping it a secret, on my bad days I do wonder though. The A ended because the OM decided to try & work things out with his W he exposed the A to her him self, my WW was really hurt by this & than as I said before she found out I cared so she was really confused for a while, now she is just angry that I am changing & doesn't understand why I can change so easily now & could not do it before.

Its getting really tough anger & resentment are creeping in, not because of the A but because she wants to act like everything is ok & we don't have anything to discuss even though we have nothing that even resembles a relationship. I have thought about asking her to leave but was advised against it.

I would like to know when & how are the best time to define my boundaries. How do you set the boundaries without LB.

Cliff