The best thing you can do is
A) protect against lovebusting and
B) build up the lovebank by having baked his favorite dessert and just by chance have it smelling fresh out of the oven when he "coincidently comes by" If he remarks it smells wonderful, you can ask if he would like some.
The trick is to act nonchalant, like you did not do this on purpose.
Your providing for his EN's will probably be unappreciated for awhile.
With time, patience and no lbing, the o/w will eventually lb and make herself, very unattractive.
I was told it also was helpful to "accidently" put brochures of "Singles Vacations" on the coffetable to be seen by ws when visiting.
Also, you can prearrange for a friend to call while ws is there, excusing yourself to take the phone call in the other room, and when he later asks who was calling you, reply "Oh nobody you know."
Also, go out all dolled up at night, and make sure your children don't know who you are going out with, so that when ws comes to pick them up at sitters, they innocently say that mommy was dressed up and they don't know who she went out with.
In order to attract ws back again, you need to look like you are making positive changes in your life and while you don't want a divorce, you also not sitting at home waiting for him to change his mind.
W/s hate cling, neediness. This behavior only make them want to push you away.
Attract you ws back through, your apprearance, demeanor and the creating a new life that may or may not include him.
