barf:

WW to OM:

I miss you, not the same falling asleep here...


She never says sappy sh*t like that.

I only went back to the 20th of March for now... I need ot get moving on some stuff.

Quote

I 'd like to think that you can trust me completely, but I know that it's probably a little difficult for you in light of my occassionally "volatile" and "annihilistic" personality...) (=

Please, please retain an attorney to protect your daughter from this guy!

I believe OM is saying that he (OM) worries that GF's daughter will not feel as strongly about him (OM) as she does for her BIO dad who IS GF.

The OM is friggin SCUM and a major preditor.

Jo

This OM is a controller and gets off on this stuff. What can you do to disrupt him? Do you know his name and any personal info? Try to get ahold of his parents, family, work, etc. Expose to any and all of them as well. Send them the proof (email, IM conversations, etc) if necessary.

Once he's exposed he'll begin to show his less attractive side and your wife will notice it as well.

I only know his name, cell number and email address. I mentioned the ex-girlfriend before, and she can give me all kinds of info, if she's willing.

My initial thoughts in this is that maybe a call to the OM wouldn't be a bad idea. To let him know you are a live human being who wants to keep his family together and this guy needs to butt out of your lives.

He thinks your WW is a saint. 'What they will do with you the may do to you'...is often heard around here. You could attempt to appeal to his 'honor' as a man. This guy doesn't sound all that interested in your wife...he sounds like he is enjoying the attention and the sex. He didn't toss around the love word. Maybe you could nip this from his end. I don't know...

After all...he said that distance doesn't make the heart grow stronger, didn't he? He sounds like a player.

Okay, GF, just started catching up from my last post. Since you are in WA, I know the perfect person to support you in your fight for your Daughter. Our good friend Sleepless in Seattle won primary custody of his son from a looloo of an XW. He has not been around much as he is doing a great job of moving forward, but I have e-mailed him and asked him to visit us and provide you his thoughts as he is in WA and experienced the custody issues.

More after I read the rest of what's been happening since I last posted.

Regards,

BB

GoodFather Please listen to this advise because you need to play offense and less defense. She is going to replace you and soon if you do not get her off of fantasy island.

It would be very powerful to file when she is off sleeping with the OM. You need to get off of your A$$ and make her think.

Get a order that keeps OM away from your child. Your wife thinks she can just move and take your child and you don't have the balls to do anything about it.

One thing I learned, don't live in fear of what might happen. You have to destroy the fantasy. If she thinks that she may lose her child or she cannot move to be with OM without losing her, well she may decide she should work on her marriage.

Good luck and you have to make a dent in her fantasy.

Now that I've read the rest, nothing much more to add except that you DO need to get Temporary Orders in place...NOW!

Regards,

BB

Protection first. Get your legal ducks in a row.

I second what Trix is saying. I would go with total nuclear exposure, including HER LIES TO HIM.

Right now she has portrayed you as a villian. No harm in letting OM know that she's the villian in this story and that she's been playing HIM.

Expose to family, friends. MIL -- what a disappointment. I'd have a hard time not telling her how disappointed I was in her ASSISTANCE in breaking up her grandbabies family. DISGUSTING.

Excerpt from GF Wife's email to OM:

"So needless to say, his comments/advice got me thinking. Part of my brain says I do want to go to VA and see where things go with you but then the other half of my brain says, okay, so you go there and then things bomb, are you guys still going to be friends? Notice I have to listen to my brain because it is still able to reason versus simply listening to my heart. Would I be stuck in a town that I don't know anyone [color:"red"] and the only other person I do know wants to do me bodily harm? [/color]"

The bold in RED above is a HUGE warning that OM can become violent.

I imagine your wife has experienced a semblance of his voilence already, thats why she's saying if she moves there (VA) and it doesn't work out with him & her, she'd feel unsafe living there (VA) after because of him. (aka bodily harm)

Unbelievable!
Jo

This will be great evidence as to why your OM should not be allowed near your DD!

Regards,

BB

Resilient,

Is is possible your quoting language was referring to Good Father. I'm thinking she means after her and husband move there and then split up that Good Father may be the "other person" she knows there that's violent.

This could be a red flag that she is portraying you to others as a violent wife - beater.

OM does refer to himself as rather hostile so I could be wrong. But I read that more as being Good Father, not OM.

Mr. W

edited...reread it and I believe you guys are right.

see my earlier post

EXPOSE the affair at your daughter's school

ASAP

If this is indeed something she said to him, I'd do everything humanly possible to keep this guy away from your daughter. It's amazing how the addiction part of the affair will make the WS do anything to get their fix.

GF:

Good Lord!!!

Before I calm down, I need 2 vent a little...

Why in heck did you cancel your appointment with SH??????? I can't imagine in any way why you would do that at a time like this. You need all the best help you can get right now, and assuming you called 2day, it'd probably be a 2ple weeks before you could get a preliminary session with him. YOU'VE PUT YOURSELF AT A BIG DISADVANTAGE.

People here know me and much of my story. And perhaps that'll give them an additional perspective view on my response 2 your sitch:

I most vehemently agree that you should be talking 2 your lawyer right now and filing. Absolutely!! I also think that TONIGHT would be a good time to draft a plan B letter 2 deliver 2 her AND the OM and everyone else while they're in Vegas . [color:"red"] Put the pressure on the OM 2 take full responsibility for meeting all your WW's EN's NOW[/color] . Suggest that she stay with her mom, or even move 2 VA, Sunday night. Be calm, be loving. Make it the best love letter/Plan B letter you can imagine.

...I am amazed at my own reaction 2 reading those emails. My hands are still shaking! It's interesting, though. I'm not really "triggered", though I am remembering how I discovered my W's A myself (accidentallly finding emails between them). What's interesting are the similarities (all As are similar in many ways), but also the marked differences. My W and Rat Meat wrote sexually explicit emails 2 one another during the height of the A - they almost never were very "deep" about anything. Before the A picked up again (they'd had an A years earlier but ended it without me knowing), they were talking about their mu2al work interests in depth. NEVER did they profess their love for one another. Rather, they recognized that neither wanted 2 leave their own families.

The A seems pretty new, ac2ally, though they probably have been physical. It's precarious right now, sustained very much by the secrecy and the fantasy. So long as they're able 2 keep the secret and only "have 2" (get 2, in their fantasy world) see one another on trips, the A could last indefinitely.

But if you blow it wide open NOW, it will very quickly collapse in a smoking heap.

I'd be willing 2 bet large sums of other people's money on that prediction.

-ol' 2long

Actually, I think this is in reference to the OM ex-girlfriend. She is not happy about thier "friendship" wait until I tell her what is really going on!

When do you plan 2 tell the ex GF?

-ol' 2long
P.S. Why aren't you at the lawyer's office?

So what is your plan?