The OM reached out to me again, requesting, almost pleading to at least remain friends so that he can continue to know about the welfare of the OC. What a mess I've created. Each time this happens, I feel as though I'm back at the beginning of NC/withdrawal again. I tell my H; this is very difficult. Back when I was still in a fog, involved in the A, I had told the OM that I would keep him informed about the OC, and he would respect that my H and I would raise the OC as our own. I think because the OM met the OC when we were still involved in the A, he's struggling to let go of her completely. The OM also contacted my H.
My surgery is Friday...
sfjaj... how is the FOM "reaching out" to you? Phone calls? E-mails? Confronting you in person? The first two can be remedied by changing phone numbers (some couples will switch cell phones), blocking/filtering his e-mail address, or even cancelling your e-mail account if he tries to get around the blocks and filters.
As far as putting you back to square one, that is exactly what this renewed contact does, even if the FOP initiates it. That's why it needs to stop.
I actually found it theraputic to put blocks/filters on FOM's e-mail addy and to deleting his addy from my contacts list and his number from my cell phone. It was kind of a cleansing experience.
Best wishes on your surgery. They can do great things in medicine now, and from what I remember it's early stage, right? Still must be awful scary. Keep a positive attitude and take care of you (and your H and your little ones). And let them take care of you, too, okay?
