GG...wow. tattoed on panties? kewl.

I should've thought of that one.

me? I have a lump the size of a peach on my head where one day I was outside sitting under a peach tree and voila! a peach fell onto my head and gave me a peach sized knot...and shortly thereafter I discovered gravity...!

lmao.

And Gnome...BETTER BEING GNOME THAN TROLL ANYDAY !!!lol.

Too, too funny both of you.

I agree with GDP. A smart guy sitting on the sidelines of life, observing all the crazy mistakes the rest of us make as afraid as we are of not getting it right... as if that were possible. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />

Question for those who've met other people here in person (who haven't posted their pictures on the MB picture thread): Did the person look as you had pictured them? I've seen Peachy's picture and she looks pretty much how I pictured her, though I didn't notice the peach-sized lump... but it's amazing what can be done with make-up. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" /> I've never met GG/Andrew or GDP but never pictured them as they describe themselves!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" />

So what has been your experience? Did people look the same or different than you had pictured/imagined?

What? You're not buying the tattooed on girlie panties?

I've met Newly. It was long ago so I can't remember what I thought she would look like. I can tell you she has great legs.

I agree with GDP that the original poster is not SNL - and I have had some experience recognizing SNL in his many incarnations. For one thing, SNL's views on love and commitment, or lack thereof, were very different.

What exactly has this poster said that people are disagreeing with? I think he makes a lot of valid points, especially concerning the difficulties in blending families and the propensity of many people to jump into new relationships.

I don't know if this person is a troll or not but he or she makes a lot of sense, in my opinion.

Thanks for the post, I think it was well-stated. Blendng families IS hard. People DO have immature and unrealistic ideas about love vs. in love and soulmates. People DO fear being alone and they SHOULD wait until they are emotionally healed and self-sufficient before entering another relationship. I don't get the brouhaha over the post.

I believe the "brouhaha" (love that word!) is do to the lecturing, pontificating & condensation found in Justin's post.

Well, that and the fact that we're not real. I keep pinching myself and I seem real to me. But then, maybe the pinches are only pretend.

Alas, alack! How can I tell

I've met a few people from here. GG is the one I've seen most. All are nice, normal people who have gone through a life changing experience, divorce.
I know you are real GG.
I've seen pictures of others, and didn't place the picture with my impression of what they would be like from their posts. I love seeing the wedding and relationship photos.
I'd love to see a picture of Peachy because she is one person I've pictured in my head, but know from others that she looks entirely different.

Here's a link to the MB Photo Album where you'll find Peachy's picture, and many others.

Whoa!
and who is ttsi?

[simply and observation]

K.

JO,

I've been here for years too (second account name)and I agree with much of what you said,not all.I don't necessarily think you are a troll.There is a very definite posting style, that I see anyway,where the person is either trying to hurt other's here or is just trying to explain and rationalize what they are doing and their(warped) thought processes
( i.e TOW/WS/OP trolls).

1) I don't agree that this is not a community.We are a group of people profoundly affected by the trauma of infidelity/divorce and other marital problems.That is our connection.Seeking out other's who have been through the same and information on how to deal with it all is part of the draw.When my H cheated on me it was the best site I had come across( in addition to seeing a counselor) that helped me deal with extreme pain and confusion.Posting here for so long has not meant that I haven't moved on but that I like to help people based on my own experiences,that's what we all suggest.Of course there are those who probably should leave and become more active in life but I would say most people DO have a healthy life in addition to being here.I would not say it's a dangerous place to be.I've received some very good advice bouncing thoughts of other's here and there are Psychologists out there who are giving very poor advice when it comes to infidelity just as there may be those here who may not give the best advice either.But a message board is just that.I have a very fulfilling life now even though I have been through he**.I come here to read and help when I can.

2)

While Hollywood stereotypes are all too evident and we do talk about it,many here do recognize it fallacies and we do not embrace it.If anything we are entering new relationships with a much broader vision than ever before of the pain people can inflict upon another,the challenges and boundaries we must face and the expectations people have that are not healthy or are just plain selfish,etc.It's these new relationships that we are facing with eyes wide open and unfortunately what we see is all too scary for the blinders are off and what is really out there is much different than what we perceived as younger women and men.The fantasies are what brought us here: our spouses chasing the fantasy and escape in other's.Ignoring reality and responsibilities.

3) I don't agree.If anything there is much trepidation about getting involved with another person after being so terribly hurt and betrayed.I know many people here that are very aware of the differences between "in love" and the dreaded "soulmate" stamp and what real love really means.For this paragraph you are preaching to the choir.We know.

4) The next two paragraphs: "preaching to the choir" again.It's all been said many times here.

5) Discomfiture: This may be true in some circumstances.Fear is a big part of dealing with infidelity and divorce.In my beginning I was very afraid at the thought of being without my H.Not because I couldn't make it on my own but because I loved him and I couldn't imagine being without him and what it meant for our family to be destroyed and my children to be without their family as it was and where they thrived.I was never motivated to be with a man just because.I am perfectly fine and secure being on my own.Still am after all is said and done.Moreover many of us have also talked about this in depth.If you have truly been here as long as you say you would know that.

5) Children.Well,for all WS's,they take a backseat to their desires and "needs".This is ALWAYS the case.It is the BS who is left with the complete responsibility.If these people we married had the childrens best interests at heart they would not be destroying our marriages and hurting their spouses for these OP and selfish desires.At this very moment,my STBXH is in Europe,enjoying a nice get away for two weeks with the OW while I stay home and take care of my 3 children.He is on the vacation we were supposed to go on as a family and that we planned for.How nice for him to be a bachelor again and have no cares.He's only called the kids twice.Of course it makes me wonder just how he could do all that given he is so poor and "has no money".Maybe the OW is footing the bill.Who knows.

This whole post by you really would be a great read for the cheaters and OP of this world.They are the ones who should get the best use out of it but wouldn't take one second to read because it doesn't apply to them in their selfish world.So while you may have wished to spur on some thought here,these observations have already been around a loooong time.We've come to the same conclusions.

IMO.

No Kidding Karona "who is ttsi?"
So we have similar tastes?

Peachy is nothing like I pictured. For the longest time I've had this image of a beautiful, thin African American woman with a confident attitude, who drew men like flies. When I found out she was white, I still thought she'd have the above traits, but with flowing dark hair.

And Karona, you know the offer stands to visit.

I have no idea! I felt guilty after I posted that, but since we're making observations, I figured it safe.
Great minds Newly, great minds!


I do appreciate your offer. You have said this to me many times. I'm not intentionally passing the offer by. It's a shell thing. I need to break free.
And where is our bud SR?

K.

Indeedy indeedy......

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" />