JS,

Sorry to hear you are hurting. It doesn't come as a surprise considering the circumstances. I sure hope for your sake and the sake of everyone this doesn't last too long.



Where do you think you've gotten off track? I saw your latest actions as being helpful but in no way saw them as indicating her separation being a good thing.

I think you need to keep doing those things that indicate the door is open for her to come back. You did well to let her deal with the feelings of your children (don't forget to reiterate to them that their Mom and Dad love them very much despite what's going on).

If you feel you're getting depressed then that's a track of a different sort. You may do well to find something that keeps you busy. I'd probably go play a round of golf every chance I get just to get my mind off of it for a while. The world keeps on spinning so try to join in with it and become an active member of it again. Got any interesting hobbies or sports you like to play?

I'm feeling your pain big guy. Like I said I hope this ends soon.

Hey MyA

I'm doing a little better today. Friday night I drank a few beers with some of the neighbors and had a good time.
Saturday was just a long and lonely day where I found myself at home by myself and couldn't stop my mind from wandering.
Took me two days to get out of that ditch.
I should have come here Saturday and talked or read.

I have a bunch of good ideas from past posts (some mine, some others)that I just printed off (9 pages of stuff) and I'll keep those at home for future lonely days.

Her mom and step dad were in town and I felt really left out because I didn't see them.
Van broke down.
Went to my sisters on Sunday. W didn't go, I didn't expect her to either but it still hurts and I couldn't completely snap out of the previous days fears so the day sucked.

I just wish we could talk more so I could get a connection with her. I think thats why she avoids sharing her day with me because if we talk for a while she opens up more and I think she realizes theres still an emotional connection there and she don't want those feelings right now.

She's still not wearing her rings or bracelet.

How do I get her to miss me?
Patience............ A word I hate right now.

JS

Guess I could have answered some of your questions MyA.

I've been in a pretty good mood lately and then Saturday I crashed.
Kids like to go to her house more now (so that hurts)it a good thing because they need to be with there mother but.....Well you know, I want them with me (at home) I don't want them to have 2 homes.
I'm really worried as to weather or not W has the energy to do this for them. I don't think she loves them like she used to, I mean she was an awsome mother who would have walked through fire for these kids and now she just looks like she is going through the motions with them.
I'm not there so I don't know.
Her mind is just so confused lately. I'm not sure she even knows what she is doing.


I thought I was getting depressed yesterday but I'm not.
I'm still eating and sleeping good and going to work so I'm cool.
No hobbies yet, S12 starts football practice tonight (3 nights a week) so that will keep me busy.
In the past I always saw the seperated parents at these games and was glad it wasn't me. You could see the pain in some of there faces.
I hope my S12 don't see any of my pain.

JS

Why? Are you trying to raise S12 to believe that life does / should not involve pain? Don't you want him to know that you are unhappy your wife / his mother moved out? Don't you want him to see an example of your being able to care for him properly DESPITE your being in pain? Don't you want him to understand that one of the difficult tests in life is to behave properly despite personal turmoil?

Not saying you are necessarily wrong to want to shield S12 from your pain. Or that there isn't an issue about how much of your pain it is appropriate for S12 to see. But I can think of several reasons why you might want S12 to see at least SOME of your pain.

Maybe that helps you feel better about what is likely to happen over the next few weeks.

Wow, JS, I'm so sorry you're going through so much pain. It really comes through in your posts. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/frown.gif" alt="" />

One thing: Don't send any more emails or make any statements to friends and relatives about how you're not sure your wife is making the best choices for herself. It's incredibly disrespectful. If she hears about it, and she probably will, it will not make you sound at all attractive.

Hy Hoti, Hi Mos,

Hold,
S12 and I discussed this just last night. I had told him this before and we talked again last night that I was very unhappy about this and that he should show his pain to me whenever he feels like it. I told him that I am doing everything in my power to get his mother back.
I also tried to explain how she was feeling.
S12 and I are learning so much more about each other and he really enjoyed our open discussion last night. This has definitely brought us closer together, he even mentioned this himself last night.

W picked up 2 younger kids last night after work and I asked her to hang out for a little bit and then I just talked to her about little things (work, kids, etc.). I can tell she doesn’t want to hang out and talk. I think she starts to feel to close when we talk and she doesn’t want that right now. It’s to hard on her to be in that house and she doesn’t want to feel (to comfortable).
She’s made a hard decision here and I guess the sooner she distances herself, the sooner she can start her new life and see if that’s what she wants.

Am I off on that one?

I’m still pretty unsure about what to do.

On one hand I like to show her I’m not insecure anymore by not asking her any questions : just letting her know about day to day things.
I’m getting a lot better about this but she probably doesn’t care (at this point) I’m not sure.
She’s always very pleasant and I try not to put any pressure on her.

On the other hand I think maybe if I disconnect myself from her (like you guys have told me before) that she can start feeling what its like to not have me around.
This helps her to decide if she needs me in her life or not. Of course you guys know how bad I want her back but the sooner I (move on) the sooner we come to a conclusion.
Is that right?

He’s not seen me cry yet. I did tell him that I cried over this on Saturday and he should cry when he wants to also.
He teared up a little bit but tried to hold it in and I told him “don’t hold it in, let it out, yell if you want to, when you want to”. I said “I cry sometimes and it makes me feel better, I get it all out, pray a little, remind myself that all will be ok, and then move on.
I reminded him that if he’s mad at his mother that, that was ok. Just understand how much she truly loves him and how hard this must be on her.

Mos,

The pain comes from my insecurities of losing her to another. Everyone that knows her says she will not seek someone else yet because she is so confused about her choice to leave and weather or not she still loves me enough to give this a chance.

Actually Mos, My friends and neighbors have said that they think she’s made a bad mistake. I’m the one usually defending her, telling them that I understand what she is doing and it’s probably better for both of us.
I said that I wish she could work on this with me but this is the only way she knows for sure if she wants to be together or not.
This (time apart) gives me time to regroup my thoughts and behaviors. I’m pretty sure (like you said) that I should stop the e-mails to her mom. (others have told me this before).


My brother said something the other day that scared the he!! out of me.
He said “remember how you felt when you wanted to leave your first wife?”
I said yeah……….”Oh [censored]”……..That’s how she feels?
I could care less what she was doing or where she was at because all I could think of was, what did I want.
She never really tried to change or work on our marriage (I think she was done to). I wonder what would have happened if she would have stopped the Lb’s and filled my emotional needs?
I wonder if it would have been different if we had kids?

I remember sometime after I left her that she stopped calling and then I wondered what she was doing. She moved on? What? Without me?
For those of you who have been through this. I really do “get it” but you have to remember how hard it was on you before you “got it”.

I’m making progress, Thanks to all of you. Last night I sat down and read all of the stuff I have printed from previous posts.
I had something from everyone of you that have posted to me. I felt a lot better after reading it.
I still haven’t opened up my new book “Love Busters” probably the one I should read the most.

S12 and I went to Icecream shop last night and on the way he asked “are you going to call mom and see if they want to go?”
I said “I don’t know if I should, she might not want to be bothered, I think she has a hard time doing family things with all of us, Should I?”. He said “yeah I haven’t seen her in a couple of days”.

Called her on the 2-way “hey, S12 and I are going for ice cream, you guys want to go?” She said “were just getting home from the laundry mat and I want to unload stuff and get it in the dryer but you can stop by and get the other 2 kids”
When we pulled up out front they were standing outside and of course the kids ran up yelling “daddy, daddy, S12, S12. W walked up to the car and I pointed inside and said “he wanted you to go with”
She said “you guys go ahead and I’ll be doing my laundry”

We walked up there and were standing in line and then I turned around and W was standing behind S12 covering his eyes.
She jumped in her car and came up there real quick.
We had a good time and laughed a little and W helped 2 little ones eat there ice cream and ate quite a bit herself. (very hot out and melting quick) I thanked her for coming and helping out.
She gave us a ride back to her house and we said we had to get going cause S12 wanted to watch wrestling.

Gave hugs and kisses and I gave W a little ½ shoulder hug (cheek to cheek) and said thanks for coming with.
She said “thank you, goodnight”.

JS

How do I get over my insecurities?

I can't stop thinking about her. She's still not wearing her rings and all I can think about is, is she the "available one" now?
I want to call her coworker and tell her to keep an eye out for W, keep the preditors away.

I know she can handle herself but I'm afraid she is vulnerable right now and might make a bad decision.

I need a way to stop focusing on her and get myself under control.

JS, the 180 really helps me get my head out of H's butt. The view is so much better out here LOL. Are you still doing your modified version?

Another thing is to get a great support network. You sounds like you are doing this to some extent already, getting together with neighbors.

I take my kids out a lot, swimming, walking. The gym is great when the kids aren't with you.

What did you do for hobbies before you met W?

No.....I haven't been, I'll look at it again tonight.
Neighbors are very helpfull but not always around.

Kids and i are going to the neighbors tonight for bar-b-que and swimming so I'll be alright tonight.

I used to ride motorcycles but really don't have no hobbies.
Took a long walk the other night, listened to my MP3 player, Kid Rock and Cheryl Crow (love song) cried under my sunglasses all the way around the block.lol

JS

Do not tell her co-worker to watch over her and "keep the predators away". That is condescending, manipulative, controlling and worst of all, likely going to push her to spite you if she ever finds out. BAAAAAAD idea.

And talking to the neighbors is OK, but not about her. Talk to them about sports, current events, the weather, whatever. They should be a distraction. Not a way to engage in more navel gazing. Again, the more you talk to them about her, the more likely she is to feel you are poisoning the well against her and the more likely she will resent you for it and maybe even do something spiteful in response.

How about a nice home improvement project? Any part of your house need painting? Any tiles that need to be caulked? Ever thought about putting in a patio or deck or building a shed? Something that will take up gobs of time and give you a sense of accomplishment when you are done. In-ground lighting for the front path?

Wishing you some peace.

JS,

Just wanted to emphasize what Hold has just said to you. It's very solid advice and you should do what you can to do exactly what was suggested.

I think you've figured this out but I want to reiterate that you need to take your W's Mom and the neighbors out of this equation. This is between you and her and no amount of gang tackling your W on this is going to help. It may, in fact, come back to haunt you just as Hold has mentioned.

I like the idea of a time-consuming home improvement project. The beauty of it is that it keeps you busy and also gives you an oppportunity to show and tell your W what you are doing to help with the sadness/pain/boredom that comes from her being gone. Not as a means to make her feel guilty (she'll own that) but as a means to show her that you have healthy responses to stressful/depressing situations.

Morning all,
Another long entry in my diary.

This is just how I’m feeling (insecure) but I wont follow through with it. I understand the consequences.

They usually ask me about her and how I am doing but I can see where this could bite me. I talked a little with them last night and told them that I just feel so bad for her because she cant eat or sleep. Never have I said anything bad that could get back to her but I still see what you say as being good sound advice. I will change this behavior.

I have a ton of things I could be doing. I could paint the kids rooms among other things but I’m having a hard time getting motivated. I won’t promise to start anything right away but I do know that I should be doing this stuff. One of the things I think she’s wanted me to do in the past is take on some more projects like this. She wanted me to put up a shed for the last couple of years so that would actually be a big step (in her eyes) for me to do and I need one anyway.
motivation, motivation, motivation. How do I get it?

Hey hold?
Did you tear out that wall yet? Lol
Start swinging that sledge hammer.

JS

MyA,
When Hold told me this the first thing I thought of was how alienated W would feel about coming back but then again, she still talks to them and I’ve told her before that they have no ill will towards her whatsoever.
I can see where I would feel alienated (if it were me leaving) about this though because I wouldn’t know for sure.
I guess your probably right about her mom too. I'll chill on the e-mails and calls to mil. If mil wants to talk she knows how to get in touch with me.
I've been told this a couple of times *sorry*

See above motivation etc.etc.

Last night I called her to see if she was planning on getting the kids and she said she was coming over after work to see if they wanted to come home with her.
I told her that we were planning to go over to neighbors house for dinner and swimming and said they invited you too if you want to come. I said but if the kids want to go with you that’s ok too.

She said she was really tired and hadn’t slept to well lately. I said “I want to talk to you a little bit about that when you come over.

When I got home she was already there, S12 was at a friend’s house, the little ones were at neighbor’s house. Asked W how work was going, she talked quite a bit about problems she’s having and I just listened (for once) and didn’t try to give advice.
Actually I’ve been pretty good about listening to her lately without trying to fix things (that’s a hard habit to break).
I asked her if she wanted to go around the house and see if there was anything else she could use. She said she wanted a little “sheer blind” that hangs over the window by my front door (I have a mini blind there to).
She said she didn’t have any cover for the window on her front door. When you pull in her driveway you can see right in her front door and she didn't like that. Then she took a roll of toilet paper out of the bathroom cabinet and said “I could use one of these?” I just laughed and said “take two there small”.

I told her I was still worried about her not sleeping well and asked if she was a little scared because she’s there alone. She said “no just the same old same old, my mind wandering at 100 miles per hour”.

I told her that I wanted to get together with her sometime and just talk about all of this away from the kids and interruptions. “I want you to tell me how your feeling and talk to me about anything, maybe you want to yell at me or get some things off your chest or just have someone that can relate to all of this”.
“Maybe we can just get together and cry a little, get it all out, I not saying I will try to fix anything but it would be nice if you trusted me enough to just listen to you.
She looked like she was getting ready to “tear up” a little so I just said “hey if you want to I’m here if not that’s ok to”.

She said “well, I’m gonna go down and give the kids a hug and tell them goodbye, I said “yeah I’ll walk down there with ya. Kids were already swimming, so we went in the back yard and sat there for a while with the neighbors and then she gave them hugs and I walked her back out to her van and I said “I’m worried about you, your neck is still breaking out a little and you look very “down”, your not sleeping well and I’ll bet your still not eating good”. “You just look tired.”
She said “my neck is starting to clear up a little bit and I haven’t lost any weight but I’m still having problems sleeping.”
I said “you just look so sad all the time and I don’t want the kids to see us being down in the dumps.” (I don’t think I should have said that)
She said “no I’m doing ok around them and I think there doing ok.
I said “they seem to be getting better as time goes on and they get more used to everything”.

I said go home and eat something and relax, she said “I don’t have anything to do around the house tonight, that cant wait so I’m just going to chill.”
Put my hand on her shoulder and said “take care of yourself ok?”

Walked down to the police station last night with the kids and the neighbors (neighborhood night out with the fire department) Kids played some games won some prizes.
Got home right at bed time 9:00. S5 said “I thought mom was picking us up tonight” I said “no that’s tomorrow night, you want to call her and say goodnight?”

Called her home phone (she just got it hooked up) no answer, tried to 2-way her and it was off.
She came over this morning and said “I slept a little better, I went to bed about 8:30 and got up once at 12:00 and once at 2:00.
I told her the kids called and she said “were they upset” I said “no they were to tired to worry about it.
She said “I hooked up my other phone in the bedroom this morning because I thought they might call, I can’t here the kitchen phone when I’m in my room because of the noisy A.C. unit.

I always feel so much better when I talk to her.
Gotta let go man, gotta let go.

JS

I just realized something, I think.

My W never seems to want to talk about things to anyone untill she is sure and confident with her answer.

I think she has trouble with making up her mind on subjects. Thats why it takes her so long to respond to questions I ask her, or she doesn't say anything at all.

Ever since this started she has said very VERY little to me about her feelings etc. Most of what I know is from her mother (explaining how W felt all of these years) or from a letter she wrote me back in December.

All of the talks that we have had in the past months (the ones you here me talking about here) have really been one sided.
Did anyone notice in my posts that when I tell you what I have said that her response has always been “that sounds good” or “ok”.

She isn’t talking to me because she has no answers yet.
Am I the only one who noticed this or was it so obvious, that you all didn’t point it out to me.
I mean, she didn’t want a legal separation when the MC suggested it, she has never said one word about divorce. She left a lot of stuff back at the house.


I’m sorry, I’m just reaching for straws here. I’m having a hard time trying to figure all of this out (and I know I can’t) .

Do I plan “A” her while she’s moved out? How? She isn’t around and doesn’t want to talk to me much (except last night) so how do I fill her EN’s or communicate enough so that she can see I won’t LB?
She’s quiet, reserved, lost in her thoughts, not in love with me, confused (I think) about her feelings.
Is this normal?

What exactly do I do? Just keep waiting? Only to find out that she made up her mind long ago and doesn’t love me anymore.
I’m scared she already knows the answers but is afraid to initiate the process of D. Anybody else agree with that assumption?
Is this just over and she is waiting for the kids to except all of this before she goes to D mode?
Is she waiting to find out if being on her own to make her own decisions is really what she wants or is she staying quiet because she already knows that answer?
Why won’t she just talk to me?

I may sound like I’m in pain but I’m not to bad right now, just paranoid…….You would be to.
I feel better when I write all of this out. Don’t even know why I hit the “continue” button sometimes, it just seems hopeless sometimes.

Going home now.

Last night when I got home from work no one was home. 2-way’d W cell phone, no answer, 2-way’d again, no answer, called her house phone, S12 answered, I said “is your mom there” yeah she’s talking to sister on her cell phone. Now she answered a call on her cell phone but she didn’t answer my 2-way (2-way doesn’t work if she’s on the phone) so I’m thinking she’s ignoring me.

She gets on the phone and said “what’s up?”
First let me say that I was confused because I didn’t realize she got off at 4:00 and had the kids because she’s never done that without calling.
I said “what’s going on” she said “oh I’m just trying to get the lawn mowed and dinner for the kids and showers and I’m going in circles, what do you want?” I said “I just didn’t realize that you had the kids and when I got home everybody was gone. I said I just 2-way’d you, W Oh I didn’t here it. JS “ok” she said “I got to go the kids are yelling and I got to get mowing” I said well what’s going on with the kids? W,”I gotta go I’ll talk to ya later” W hung up.

I called her back and my cell phone kept cutting out (son couldn’t here me) she 2-way’d me and sounded upset and said “what did you want?” W-“now my phone is screwed up and I got to figure out what is wrong with that”
JS What’s going on? W “I’m busy” JS “I was just confused because the kids aren’t here and I wanted to tell them goodbye” W “well if you want to come over and give hugs go ahead but I’m busy” Js “ok bye.”

Went over to her house and she was mowing the lawn, she shut off the mower and said (nice voice) what’s up?
I said did I do something wrong? W-“why?”
JS “Because you get off early and come and get the kids and don’t call or leave a note or anything, I was confused and figured you must have been mad”
W—“No nothing is wrong, It really ticked me off because I think she knew exactly the point I was trying to make.
I said “listen yesterday you came over after work knowing that the kids were staying with me but you came over anyway to see them, well I want to see them to and I assumed you were working to 5:00 tonight and that you would come over and get them then”. W—“yeah you assumed”
I said why are you treating me this way? Why are you being so mean to me?
W-I’m was just really stressed and in a hurry . JS—you want me to mow for you?
W—“no I can do it myself” (mean voice)
JS—“I know you can, and I know you don’t need my help, I was just asking.
W- did you see S12?
JS no I’ll go inside and say hi,
W followed me in the house (shaking her head)
JS—“I said why are you so mad at me?
W—“I said I was sorry”
JS—Ok
W—I TOLD YOU I’M SORRY
UUUUGHHH, I wanted to scream and say stop telling me your sorry!

Anyway I never yelled at her and I walked away when she got mad (and I was getting very emotional)
I went home and cried my eyes out for a while.
At about 9:30 I called (kids were still up) and she answered the phone very pleasant.
I said “hey I just wanted to say I’m sorry, I know you were stressed out and I’m sure I didn’t help things any, but making you mad was not my intention. This is all just new and I was hurt by the fact that you just took the kids and didn’t call or say what you were doing. I knew you were getting them tonight but I didn’t know anything else, like where S12 was or that you were getting off early.
W—that’s ok, you want to tell the kids gnight?
JS yeah
W gets back on the phone and I said, call me tomorrow so I know where there staying tomorrow night and how S12 is getting to football practice etc. etc.
She said she was picking babysitter (2 doors down from me) up at 7:15 am and taking her to W’s house to watch the kids today.

I wish I could just let this go. I don’t feel good about how I handled things last night but I’m glad she let me apologize.
Its hard because the night before we had a good conversation and then last night she just try’s to avoid me totally and be rude or aloof.
And then says (what did I do wrong?)

I got to let go of some of this, she tried to push my buttons (I think) and I didn’t handle it to well, not to bad, but still not good.

As always I wish I could go back and do things differently but I’ll try to do better next time.
I need to let her go but I’m not to good at this.

Help me with motivation, remind me of my direction.
JS

The other night when we were at neighbors house, W was there telling the kids goodbye and I walked her out to her van. We were in the neighbors’ house alone getting ready to walk out the back door and neighbors’ dog popped his nose under W’s skirt a little and she said Woooo, bad dog. Lol
I slipped my hand under her skirt and touched a little spot on her backside (where cheek meets the leg) (my favorite spot) and W just stopped and didn’t pull away or anything and I said “wait let me do that again” she just waited for me to do it, smiled a little, didn’t say anything and then opened the door.
I didn’t push it or anything but in the past if I started to go too far she would say “ok that’s enough” but this time she didn’t get mad or anything.

I think she still loves me but she is afraid that “my changes” aren’t permanent and it’s just too soon to decide anything anyway. You’re probably thinking I’m still obsessing over her and I am.
It’s so hard to just “back off”. Are you guys sure that’s what I should do?

Here’s an e-mail I sent to her yesterday, Was this a bad thing?
I know you guys have told me to stop but how do I know what’s right or wrong?
Remind me again please. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" />

Which parts were good and which parts were bad?
I know this (separation) will take time and I don’t want her to think I’m ok with all of this but I want her to know I’m willing to cooperate. Does that make any sense?


Well, last night when I got home from work W was at the house to pick up S12 for football practice, made small talk (she seemed very pleasant). I stopped saying “I love you” Not giving her “big” hugs or kissing her cheek anymore, not asking her anymore questions.

********note to self*******

[keep reading El’s posts]

(((((thanks El))))) <--------guy hug (totally Asexual El)

We sat together at S12’s practice and exchanged phone numbers (from cell phone) (baby sitter etc.). Had some great conversation about kids, laughed a little about stuff.
Totally nice situation, walked her and the 2 little ones to the van, told kids have a good time and see ya tomorrow, Told W bye.
She was standing there probably thinking I would hug her but I just smiled and said “Have fun guys”
She smiled and said “you too”.
She called me at 7:30 pm and said she was going to bring the kids to my house in the morning before work because the babysitter wanted to be by her own house today.
She called me again at 8:30 pm to talk about, well (nothing really) When she was done I just said “ok goodnight”

All in all a very nice evening.

E-mail I sent today


Same question, lay off a bit or lay off altogether?

Sounds like you did great yesterday and this morning. Maintain.

I'm on GQII
See ya around guys...thanks for the help
JS

Why are you on GQII?

Is your W having an A?

Thanks for the help and see you around?

Sorry mya ,
I'm not sure if she is in an a or not (maybe she's testing me)
She has a friend/coworker that helped her move some stuff last week and he spent the night 2 times,both times the kids were there.
So she wasn't exactly hiding it.
I dont know for sure but I'm treating it like an a but what if its not...I mean I'm not dumb but maybe they are just friends.

Kids say he was down on his luck a little (wifes fog talk?...not sure) and he just stayed out in the living room on the fold out.

What do ya think guys?

I can't see her with him really but what else can i do?
I mean a few months back I couldn't see her leaving either and she's gone so ?????maybe

I guess a part of me really want to think she is in an a so I can justify all of this madness and go start a plan for recovery.

I know how easy it can happen.

Then a part of me says maybe not.
but i'm gonna treat it as a start to an ea or pa.
I'm sure if its not an ea it will be real soon.
And it could be a pa thats been going on for a while.

I just never have seen any of the red flags that i see on other threads about adultery.
I'm really confused now.
any advice?

Don't you think I need to go over to GQII?
Come and see me sometime.

JS

I'm a wreck, can I post over here for a while?



I don’t know what to do, I’m not sure if I can do this.
A friend of mine told me that he’s known frank and that he is a drug dealer and that he was a friend of W’s sister. W had told me that she went to school with franks sister and that’s why they became friends.
I didn’t tell her yet that I knew he was a dealer (I want to make sure) also I don’t want to talk to her any more regarding Frank. She will just think I’m trying to control her.
My friend also told me that he saw frank last week with his girlfriend at the beach. (not my W)
I asked her last night if she would agree with me to not have frank stay there when the kids are there until they get a little more used to being at her house.
I just said If you want him to move in that’s your business but I think it would be best for the kids if you waited for a little while.

She said I can agree to some things that you say. (whatever that means.) Based on what she has done in the past, I’m starting to think that there’s nothing going on there and she is trying to make me crazy or just showing me that she can do whatever she wants to, weather I like it or not.

If I talk to her mom she will just think I’m crazy or jealous or something and then she will call W and W will tell her its no big deal and he is just a friend and that I don’t know what I’m talking about.
I need a lot more proof before I do anything.

I’m not sure what to do now. I have to see W tonight at S12’s football practice. How should I act?
Do I make small talk or just distance myself from her?

Any ideas on where I go from here?
I’m hurting so bad right now, It just sucks.
JS