This site has helped me tremendously and i thought if someone could learn from my mistakes it may make it all the better. When someone postes a reply to you and states read the love bank and emotional needs articles, please do, they meen a lot. I am still trying to begin a fix with my wife with no success but without the words of wisdom from this site it would probably be a lot worse. I learned a lot of things that I was saying were hurting instead of helping. Another thing everyone tells you is have patience. I dont and can tell you it hurts everything, hurts me, hurts her, hurts the relationship. Dont expect a mirracle fix, everyone here wants to help and their words do help but no one can say "do this and all will be well". I was hoping for this, didnt get it, got agrivated, but finally realized everyone and every situation is different. If you get the urge to blow up, go for a walk. 3 out of 4 times I have gone for a walk and worked things out in my own mind. The 4th time I blew up and hurt things more. When you blow up things come out without you thinking fast enough and feelings are hurt. My wife has a problem, unknown problem, and whatever it is it is up to her to make the next move. I want to help her so bad that I keep trying and cant leave her alone. Sometimes a little space and time can do more good than acting like me and agrivating the h*** out of the other person. I am the kind of person that likes answers. I want an answer as to why she want try again. Its bugging me so bad that I wont to ask her everytime I talk to her. I fight myself and make myself keep my mouth shut. Dont push too hard, dont aggrivate, dont be a pest and push them farther away. Keep the love alive, dont build hatred. If everyone felt love the way I feel love for my wife, the divorce rate would be much lower. Dont wait too long. Our problems have been building for several years, if one of us had stepped foward a couple of years ago, we may not be in the situation were in now. I finally stepped foward and fell off a cliff. I am shure someone will dissagree with some of what I have sayed. Thats part of this site. You will get some different answers and you will have to use your own judgement a little. Best of all, dont give up. I havent yet even though it looks done. Hope this helps.
