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Orchid,

I'm not sure you understand...

DH is the BH, I am the FWW.

Sorry for the misunderstanding. Flip the roles.

Same principal or general concept. Re: if he is NOT making his family feel safe.....he needs to know.

If you are the Fws, sounds more like you have shed that title back to being his W? If so, then you can still work with helping him come back but he needs to help you heal as well. It is a 2-way street you both must work on.

L.