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good one Shaden ! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />
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isn't Reba in an affair marriage? No... her H left her and he is in an affair marriage. Reba is the BS. The show is based around her XH and his new W always coming to Reba for help... and she gives it. Probably the one show that is based around a storyline of an A that I can still watch and laugh at... so can my FWW. The A isn't funny, but the characters are. I stay away from other shows and movies which are based on A's. Shaden
BH (Me) - 38
WW - 36
Married - 16 years
2 children - 10,12
DD1 - 05/30/05 - EA suspected, W wanted space
DD2 - 07/01/05 - EA/PA discovered & confronted WW
DD3 - 07/21/05 - Further contact discovered and now ended.
11/07/05 - exposed to OMW...
07/01/07 - separated to give "space". recovery was not progressing.
09/04/07 - DDAY all over... new OM.
Patience with God is Faith.
Patience with myself is Hope.
Patience with others is Love.
FAITH REQUIRES ACTION!
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Probably the one show that is based around a storyline of an A that I can still watch and laugh at... Maybe because they portray the XH and OW as so stupid and non-functional. Atleast one of the episodes also had the XH realizing he wasn't happy and wanted back with Reba. She said No way. Shaden
BH (Me) - 38
WW - 36
Married - 16 years
2 children - 10,12
DD1 - 05/30/05 - EA suspected, W wanted space
DD2 - 07/01/05 - EA/PA discovered & confronted WW
DD3 - 07/21/05 - Further contact discovered and now ended.
11/07/05 - exposed to OMW...
07/01/07 - separated to give "space". recovery was not progressing.
09/04/07 - DDAY all over... new OM.
Patience with God is Faith.
Patience with myself is Hope.
Patience with others is Love.
FAITH REQUIRES ACTION!
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Shaden
truth be told
the only people I trust when it comes to this particular dilemma are the ones who feel conflicted the ones who are solidly cemented in their opinion about 'how this SHOULD be handled' are suspicious in my own mind
this issue is not an obvious straight line from A to B
geometry fails here
the side-trips in our own minds are the more productive when trying to find our way
be suspicious of someone telling others what to feel when the situation is multi-layered and all gooey like this one is BINGO!! You hit the nail on the head perfectly with this. This is a very difficult situation and I too have a hard time taking anyone seriously who is so cemented and unconflicted in their opinion that they feel qualified to lecture others in theirs. This is a very difficult moral dilemma because the morality of the issue is CLEAR, but APPLYING it correctly is very difficult. But if one doesn't comprehend the underlying MORAL, they won't have a conflict, of course. Which says much about them.
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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isn't Reba in an affair marriage? No... her H left her and he is in an affair marriage. Reba is the BS. The show is based around her XH and his new W always coming to Reba for help... and she gives it. Probably the one show that is based around a storyline of an A that I can still watch and laugh at... so can my FWW. The A isn't funny, but the characters are. I stay away from other shows and movies which are based on A's. Shaden Shaden I live where the TV community eats and works and has their cars washed ... I think REBA the actual woman (not the TV show character) left her H for another man ... but I am certainly NOT certain (obviously) Pep <~~~ duh
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Mel... did you get my email about Business Week article?
Pep
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And you responded... You know, Shaden, I don't know if I agree... Hello, my name is Bubba... I see you hidin' behind dat tree. Shaden bwahahahaa! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> that is not what I disagreed WITH, OhCanadaBoy! I disagreed with your comment that the "logical" response was to end the 10 year marriage and go BACK to the first marriage. I don't know that that is the best solution, much less the logical response. THAT is what I was disagreeing with, BUBBA! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/pfft.gif" alt="" /> I agree. I guess logically, that the WS becomes a FWS and the original family is back together again. But is the pain greater in that situation? Now we have new children to hurt... consequences... 10 years of building relationships and family to hurt... consequences... what about the first husband... has he moved on with his life? Would anyone wait for 10 years? Should they dissolve their marriage, apologize and maybe receive forgiveness from the 1st H, and then... remarry?
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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oh... couldn't tell you about the real women... I don't follow the celebs that much... that's what my W likes to do. I only know about what she tells me.
Shaden
BH (Me) - 38
WW - 36
Married - 16 years
2 children - 10,12
DD1 - 05/30/05 - EA suspected, W wanted space
DD2 - 07/01/05 - EA/PA discovered & confronted WW
DD3 - 07/21/05 - Further contact discovered and now ended.
11/07/05 - exposed to OMW...
07/01/07 - separated to give "space". recovery was not progressing.
09/04/07 - DDAY all over... new OM.
Patience with God is Faith.
Patience with myself is Hope.
Patience with others is Love.
FAITH REQUIRES ACTION!
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Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1
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Mel... did you get my email about Business Week article?
Pep Yes, I did. Thanks for sending that. I have printed up her picture for my next TARGET PRACTICE. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Mel... but I later stated that the rest of my statement was sort of sarcasm... "tongue-in-cheek". My whole point was there wasn't any really good answer. Off the cuff I was "sarcastically" saying... of course, the obvious, logical choice would be to just divorce and remarry the 1st H.
I was agreeing with you.
Shaden
BH (Me) - 38
WW - 36
Married - 16 years
2 children - 10,12
DD1 - 05/30/05 - EA suspected, W wanted space
DD2 - 07/01/05 - EA/PA discovered & confronted WW
DD3 - 07/21/05 - Further contact discovered and now ended.
11/07/05 - exposed to OMW...
07/01/07 - separated to give "space". recovery was not progressing.
09/04/07 - DDAY all over... new OM.
Patience with God is Faith.
Patience with myself is Hope.
Patience with others is Love.
FAITH REQUIRES ACTION!
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Posts: 35,996
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ummmmmmm
Mel?
she sounds rather like a long lost sister of yours
*ducking*
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Mel... but I later stated that the rest of my statement was sort of sarcasm... "tongue-in-cheek". My whole point was there wasn't any really good answer. Off the cuff I was "sarcastically" saying... of course, the obvious, logical choice would be to just divorce and remarry the 1st H.
I was agreeing with you.
Shaden As well you should, BUBBA!!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/pfft.gif" alt="" />
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Shaden, Your very long post was very thoughtful and helpful to ME... thank you. Soas not to confuse the issue further, I will send an air kiss (far fewer cooties). <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" /> Many years ago there was a poster who said that she would happily watch the OW choke on a piece of meat. She and I had quite the discussion about that and in the end, we became friendly off MB (ended up we lived close to each other... we'd planned to meet and then she was killed in an auto accident). The thing is: She helped me remember the pain of being a BS (though I'd been a BS years before, my reason for coming to MB was as a WS)... and I helped her to put a face on a WS who was capable of change. I think that when people like JJ come on board, we have an opportunity to test what we believe... and that's a good thing.
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alert the media
Shaden & Mel are in harmony !
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Maybe that will come after she has had time to ponder the responses she received... and her own actions... and then, we can joyfully say the forum did help her.
Shaden I feel certain this forum already HAS helped her ! ESPECIALLY the controversy has helped her ! Can you see why? Pep
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ummmmmmm
Mel?
she sounds rather like a long lost sister of yours
*ducking* Oh yes she does! I cringed when I saw it last night. Ironically, she was featured on the front of another magazine in a similar article in the mid 90's!
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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don't you mean
Bubba and Mel???
BH (Me) - 38
WW - 36
Married - 16 years
2 children - 10,12
DD1 - 05/30/05 - EA suspected, W wanted space
DD2 - 07/01/05 - EA/PA discovered & confronted WW
DD3 - 07/21/05 - Further contact discovered and now ended.
11/07/05 - exposed to OMW...
07/01/07 - separated to give "space". recovery was not progressing.
09/04/07 - DDAY all over... new OM.
Patience with God is Faith.
Patience with myself is Hope.
Patience with others is Love.
FAITH REQUIRES ACTION!
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Joined: Apr 2001
Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1
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Posts: 92,985 Likes: 1 |
alert the media
Shaden & Mel are in harmony ! We need to nuke those silly foreign devils! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" />
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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Shaden, Your very long post was very thoughtful and helpful to ME... thank you. Soas not to confuse the issue further, I will send an air kiss (far fewer cooties). <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" /> Many years ago there was a poster who said that she would happily watch the OW choke on a piece of meat. She and I had quite the discussion about that and in the end, we became friendly off MB (ended up we lived close to each other... we'd planned to meet and then she was killed in an auto accident). The thing is: She helped me remember the pain of being a BS (though I'd been a BS years before, my reason for coming to MB was as a WS)... and I helped her to put a face on a WS who was capable of change. I think that when people like JJ come on board, we have an opportunity to test what we believe... and that's a good thing. Morning S, Not to threadjack, but are you speaking of Tania? It reminded me of her very painful journey. I pray she's at peace now. Hope you are well hon. Jo
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don't you mean
Bubba and Mel??? bwhahahaa, somebody is onna roll this morning! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena.." Theodore Roosevelt Exposure 101
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