RT, I have not called your W a liar, only pointed out that folks who are in an affair DO LIE. That is a fact of life. And if your W is having an affair, lying is an expectation. It is ugly to hear and see but a reality that you must face if your W is in an affair.

I do tend to call things as THEY ARE, and I can see this is upsetting to you so I won't post to you again. I wish you the best. Take care.

Rockthrower, please don't imagine that the people on this forum don't have your best interests at heart. I am fairly new here and only posted last week about my H's emotional affair. I didn't want to believe what I was being told, as I trusted my H of almost 25 years and believed his assurances that nothing was going on. They are very believable and plausible, making you out to be the culprit for not trusting.

I have, just this weekend, discovered that the 'friendship' had become physical. I was just about to update my post when I started to read your thread. I now find that, throughout the summer I have been subjected to a stream of lies, and I was almost believing every one of them. It was only my intuition that made me probe deeper and get to the truth eventually.

I do hope that your situation has not already gone as far as mine, or that you can ensure that it doesn't with your constant vigilance and efforts.

All the best.
Diane

Patient for what? She doesn't sound like a regular attendee at counseling sessions where she can work on issues. Wheneven I hear "please be patient with me" it reminds me that: "something's going on, I want to continue it and I'm not disclosing what it is." Patience is a virtue but not if one has to compromise their boundaries to exhibit it, then it's an enabling behavior.

V/r,
No way