I can't think of a better option than to expose to HR at the hospital face-to-face.

With the OM being the superior in the workplace, they will have to take some action.

Your WW's renewed anger will be secondary to the fact that as a responsible employer, the hospital will have to take a position on the affair. Someone will have to go, probably the superior, as he presents a large $$$ liability to them. If they fire your WW, there will be a huge threat of a sexual harassment lawsuit, which should make them quiver in their booties.

Remember to present your case aa a loving husband, doing everything in his power to save his marriage. No threats, implied or otherwise. Cool, calm and collected throughout your meeting. It will be the best investment of 10 minutes you can make at this time.

You've come this far! No time to let up while the opponent (the affair) is wobbling. Go for the knockout punch!

You have some great support here...

Best wishes,
SD

Another Vote YES.

Fire that round!

Keep up the pressure on the A!

Fire.

Update on situation. OMW called and basically led me to believe that OM is not going to be leaving his job any time soon, nor did I really expect to hear otherwise. She stated that he is looking at other job possiblities, but that all takes time. Which to me says that he isn't going anywhere, and time is not on my side right now.

She stated that she knows that I need to do what I need to do, but that she honestly believed that getting the workplace involved would not make any difference and not have the desired effect.

She then said that she had talked to a lawyer about the situation and she wanted to know if I was aware that I could be potentially liable for Tortious Interference with a Business Relationship. She wasn't necessarily threatening to sue, nor do I really believe she would, but I am aware of the tort and it is a possiblity. But there is also a tort for intentional interference with a family relationships. In any event, I don't want to sue or be sued.

So now I have to look into potential liablity of this. Again, I don't think that they actually would file suit against me, but I can't make any assumptions.

In all likihood, the hosptial would not terminate either one of them. If that was the case, then I would not be exposed to liability. I should find out what the policy is before going down that road though.

Scotty

Scotty,

You are overthinking this...No WS is gonna go forward with a lawsuit of that nature...It won't happen...IF it did, look on the bright side, YOU have FREE legal...IF OMW threatens that again, tell her to HAVE AT IT and remind her that you don't pay legal fees!!! EXPOSE NOW!!!

Mrs. W

My husband had an affair with a co-worker. We were educators at the same school. Our counselor let us know that in order to save our marriage that one or both would have to find another workplace. This was during the school year so it was really impossible for that to happen. I prayed and prayed that something would happen - it felt hopeless. There were two openings mid-semester at other schools. The affair did not happen at work and neither were fired, but because of the "volatile" situation transfers took place. My husband didn't see the need to change schools, he thought he could handle it. He later told me that he couldn't "handle" anything. She was like a drug and all his decisions were made quickly with no thought behind them. I didn't force the transfers - they happened because of "word" getting out to human resources. I didn't leak any information, the grapevine did. It didn't stop the affair. It kept going for another month and a half. It seemed a crisis had to take place for change to happen. The OW's husband threatened to kill my husband if he ever saw him and that snapped my husband into reality and onto his kids.

Scotty

Just looked it up

The 3rd element of the claim for Tortious Interference with a contract or Advantageous Business Relationship or Expectancy is:

*Intentional AND improper interference by the defendant, inducing or causing a breach, disruption or termination of the contract or the business relationship or expectancy.


It's not IMPROPER...and NO JURY IS GOING TO CONSIDER IT IMPROPER to inform your wifes bosses that YOUR WIFE is having an affair with OM and you want to save your marriage.

Plus...you don't really "intend" to destroy his career or get him fired...you are merely fighting for YOUR marriage...they can do with the info what they must and will...you are just revealing the truth.


Of course, you know you're good on defamation.

Like my wife said...tell them to "bring it on" cause absolutely NO WAYWARD SPOUSE will get up on the stand and try to defend their actions out in the open.

Mr. Wondering

I'm not a lawyer and I won't pretend to understand the liability issues. However, I seem to remember reading that it's not slander if it can be proven. And if they sue, you can depose them both and let them hang themselves.

Seems like neither of them is in a hurry to leave work. OM is probably going to hang out and hope your WW will quit and move to Arizona. WW is probably hoping OMW will pressure OM to find a job elsewhere.

Fire!

Actually DON'T tell them to bring it on UNTIL after you've exposed them. Until then play possum and act like you took the threat seriously and won't do it.

Keep the enemy off balance lest they forewarn their bosses that YOU are a crazed jealous abusive controlling husband that may come up their to create waves.

Forewarned is forearmed.

Mr. Wondering

Scotty...

I find it appealing when Mr. W takes control and ACTS...THAT is what you MUST do and NOW...Your WW might be angry now, but if she becomes a real FWW, she will thank you for fighting for her and your marriage...Be her hero, that's HOT...DO IT!!!

Mrs. W

You also realise, I hope, you have a very strong action against the company in which a superior had an affair with an employee who reported to him, even if tangentially.

This came up during exposure of OM in my case. OMW threatened to sue over continued contact at work (FWW was the superior). What OMW and OM were really worried about was workplace consequences - appearances really.

Stop over analysing. Just expose properly. Have all your ducks in a row. Write the letter. talk to HR.

It will work in your favor on every level. Trust me.

Mr. W's post reminded me of something...

Stop blabbing all your plans to OMW! She is not necessarily your ally in all this. Any plans you share with her are at risk of finding their way to OM's ears.

Pump her for information, share intel with her...but maintain your operational security.

I can only imagine your cross examination:

Scotty: "So Mr. Cheater why did you get fired"

Mr. Cheater: "Because you told my boss I was having an affair with your wife"

Scotty: "Mr. Cheater, what came first, the chicken or the egg...don't answer that"

Scotty: "So you are saying you got fired because you had an affair with my wife"

Mr. Cheater: "No, because you TOLD them I was having an affair with your wife"

Scotty: "So having an affair with my wife had nothing to do with you getting fired"

Mr. Cheater: "I suppose it did, but you shouldn't have told...albeit for YOU telling, I wouldn't have gotten fired"

Scotty: "Because they wouldn't have known about your affair?"

Mr. Cheater: "Exactly"

Scotty: "So you got fired because I told you were having illicit adulterous sex with my wife"

Mr. cheater: "That's what I've been trying to tell you"

Scotty: "Mr. Cheater, what's the opposite of "above me"?

Mr. Cheater: "Below me?"

Scotty: "Below me, Exactly"

I was just thinking the same thing - Scotty has FREE legal.

Plus your just helping your poor wife with a boss that is bring sex into the workplace. Defend that in court.

M2L

I wasn't really worried about being sued. Although I did at one point consider the possibility of that tort, I didn't give it much credence and didn't even look at the elements in my state.

I have done so now, and in my state there are four elements: "An action for tortious interference with business relations entails four elements: that the defendant's acts: (1) are intentional and willful; (2) calculated to cause damage to the plaintiff's business; (3) done with the unlawful purpose of causing damage or loss, without right or justifiable cause on the part of the actor; and (4) result in actual damages and loss."

I wouldn't be doing it with the purpose of causing damage or loss, without right or justifiable cause on the part of the actor. Accordingly, I don't see how I would be liable even if one of them was termianted.

When OMW made me aware of the tort, I told her that if they felt like they needed to sue me, then go right ahead and do what you need to do. To her, I didn't give it any credence whatsoever.

I know that I need to stop blabbing to OMW, it was a mistake that I made yesterday and regretted it immediatly after saying anything about it. But the mistake was made and now I have to move on.

LMAO Mr. W love...OMG...hahahahahahahaha!!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Hint to others who may not get this...say Mr. Cheater's part real fast...LOL

Mrs. W <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/pfft.gif" alt="" />

Scotty,

That rounds loaded, the gun is elevated, we've corrected for windage and rotation. That round is dead on target.

Are you gonna pull the cord and remove their last affair sanctuary?

Stay Strong!

We're "pulling" for ya!

Bahahahahaha!!!

I just got it!

2 hours later, but hey, you know what they say?

He who laughs lasts.....

thinks slowest. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

How do you make a blonde laugh on Sat.?

You tell them a joke on Wed. LOL <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/pfft.gif" alt="" />

~ Marsh

Got it the first time, but 15 minutes later I am still wiping tears from my eyes. Thank God I did not have drink in my hand or this keyboard would be history.....

Just for you to "steal" Marsh... Click Here <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" /> Oh yeah, and as and added bonus, click here<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> too!!!

Mrs. W

P.S. And...HEY, not ALL dumbs are blonde!!! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/pfft.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />