Also...time to get an MC that IS working actively to help you rebuild your marriage.

Thought for you...we had a similar situation during our trouble times. Our MC had the right ideas, but was coming down so hard on WW that WW was really just shutting her out. Made her feel like all she did was show up and get beat up. While it made me feel vindicated, it wasn't doing anything to help us, since my wife didn't want to take any of her advice.

We'd both started IC at the same time (I insisted on all of the C...if she chose to come back and live in the same house, she was going to have to do this). My IC was awesome...very supportive of my working to rebuild the marriage, great ideas, etc...

So, we decided to drop him as my IC, and pick him up as our MC. BEST DECISION we could have made!!! He made it clear to my wife that while he'd BEEN my IC, he was there for BOTH of us to help us with our marriage. He didn't let her get away with anything, but had a great way of making her feel like she could talk openly and honestly at the same time.

Would this be an option for you perhaps?

I have probed the WW about why her and her IC will not talk to my IC. But I get the cover up answers of I don't know. So I am still working on that aspect of gettting the three counsellors together.

As for her going to my IC... Well last time I asked WW stated that she prefers a female. My IC is up to being the MC and will set her straight as he has done me. He doesn't take the "I don't know" answer.

Thanks for the help I will continue to search and find out the answers.

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