I ended up not sending that email to OWH. I heard some things that made me doubt whether OW and he should be married at all. I don't really want to help him anymore. He is on his own. It seems that OW and OWH are swingers and that is how my husband became involved with OW. They are all vile and disgusting. Good riddance.

I had my court hearing this morning. After 3 weeks of court ordered mediation, we were not able to come to an agreement and ended up having the hearing. WH pretended to compromise with the mediator at first, but in the end kept coming back to the same points that we were arguing over to begin with. She would make a suggestion and then he would always interject with an "Oh by the way couldn't we try this". By the second week she and I were both sick of him. When our lawyers and the mediator went before the judge she said right away that his suggestions for visitation weren't in the best interests of DD2 and that he had been behaving VERRRY badly towards me with regards to visitation (him not following what had been laid out before). She said she absolutely would not side with him on visitation and he ended up getting the court standard every other weekend one night per week (or if his schedule changes again to not include weekends then his two nights off per week only). His lawyer brought up child support again.... Talk about beating a dead horse. They lost on that point as well, in fact my child support may actually increase! I felt really good about how things went today. WH even had to agree to a clause in the parenting plan that said that he could not bring any SO's around DD2 without talking to me and getting my consent (the same goes for me). We all know I will never agree to that unless they are married. WH then brought up some mystery issue about needing me to write in something that said it was okay for him to drop DD2 at MIL house during visitation if he needed to "run an errand". I said there is no need to do that, he can just take DD2 with him if he needs to run an errand...that is what I do. He was very insistent saying that DD2 was going to be with him on every day he had off and he needed some time to be able to "run errands" (read need to have time to have SF with skanky OW please tell me this is ok). Needless to say I did not agree to that. Poor WH LOL!

The only fly in the ointment was WH had OW come with him to the court hearing this morning. I have never met her and I guess WH thought I wouldn't notice her there. I recognized her immediately. She looks just like me. Only older and overly tanned (I hate when people tan too much and their skin looks all leathery ewwwww). Even her hair is the same style as mine. Flattering or creepy take your pick. I texted OWH and told him she was there. He is furious. He just refuses to see the truth. Sad really.

WH has been desperately trying to break through my plan B for two weeks now. He has called no less than 5 times in the last week. I am starting to get annoyed. He isn't even trying to stick to the court order of protection anymore. He called me last night because he "had to ask my permission about something urgent". I just ignored him. I am really proud of myself. Someone broke into our minivan this week and I still didn't break down and call him. I sent him a 3 sentence email telling him what happened. That was it. I don't know why he is so bent on talking to me now. Maybe because our divorce is looming very close now. My lawyer said today that barring any crazy stunts we should have the divorce inked by Aug 23rd.

The only things that remain to be settled are the house equity split and division of property. WH already said he didn't want anything else from the house so that only leaves the equity split. It is really happening....I will be divorced very soon. Why am I still not feeling ok with all this? I thought I would be feeling great by now. Seeing OW at court today really put me in a funk. I wanted to jump up and kick her @ss. I am trying to shake it off. WH looked really bad today. He has put on a lot of weight. His pants looked skin tight. I wonder how I will be feeling come Aug 23rd. Good or depressed?

That is EXCELLENT news!!! Don't expect to feel happy about the divorce, because no matter how bad things were, it is still a loss. But as time passes, you will start feeling better.

Wow, WH and OW really make quite a pair. I'd sure like to be a witness to some of their conversations - the first liar doesn't stand a chance. They will NEVER last. She may even go back to her clueless hubby and convince him it was all innocent.

Imagine the OW showing up in court for the divorce. SICK

August 23rd is quickly approaching. There has been a flurry of letter writing between our two attorneys this week. These letters are all concerning the financial settlement of the divorce. I am sure the fact that my WH is again refusing to compromise in the financial portion of our divorce is no surprise to anyone. I am kind of stuck on this point. Missouri is a marital misconduct state. I have a very clear case of marital misconduct on several points, spousal abuse, adultery, and misappropriation/dispersement of marital assets. WH and his attorney are refusing to acknowledge our marital misconduct case and are demanding:
a) 50/50 equity split of the home
b) that WH get the mortgage tax credit for the year (even though WH only lived in the home 1 month of the year and did not contribute to payment of the mortgage)
c) A list of personal property items from the home

Mentally I am dead set against agreeing to any of their terms for an equal distribution of assets. For one, it would be like I am agreeing that the manner in which WH behaved was in no way objectionable. Just chalk one up for the WS fogged out excuse of "We just weren't right for each other, we fell out of love". Am I being petty? I am really feeling like I need this small moral victory to not feel like I have been a victim. I ended up giving WH WAY MORE visitation than he would have gotten if it had been up to a judge. As it is, he has seen DD2 only once out of the four visitation periods he has had so far this month. The increased visitation he gets only serves one purpose....to lower his child support payments. I could get this modified at a later date, but only after the divorce is final.

Should I stick to my guns? Or try to compromise and just get the D finalized quickly? Frankly the thought of WH getting an equal settlement and then turning around and using that money to set up house with OW makes my blood run cold. I am probably being bitter about this. The extra money I would get would mean the difference in me getting a new home or not being able to afford a down payment and renting. Any opinions? 2x4's?