I'm with Belle, WIC. There
is no perfect time to expose or, in fact, do anything else. Just suck in a deep breath, pardner, and do it.
I would also suggest you get yourself to your doctor and ask him/her to prescribe an anti-depressant for you. Right now, you’re flying off the handle too easily and then suffering terrific lows. Anti-depressants will even that out and make things much easier to bear. Go today, pardner. They take a couple of weeks to take effect so don’t delay. Your children deserve at least
one sane parent.
WIC, listen…quit expecting your WW to be logical and reasonable. She’s an alien, remember? Get that into your head. Make yourself see one of the aliens from that Star Wars barroom when you think of or see your wife. It’ll help. No one expects logic or reason from an alien, right? Aliens exist only to berate you, say (and do) disrespectful things, and humiliate you by any means possible.
Expect nothing else at this stage, WIC because you’re not going to get anything but that. Don’t let it throw you.
I think it’s a good time for you to review Pepperband’s “The Carrot And Stick Of Plan A.” You have a sense of what you should be doing in Plan A. Pepper’s thread encapsulates the technique in a very few short, simple policies. Her thread can be found here:
[color:"blue"]Pepper's "Carrot & Stick Thread" [/color]
I see where you think you should stop snooping. I would advise against that. Instead, keep up your intelligence gathering operation and
journal everything you find. Regretfully, you may need such information if your attempt to revive your marriage fails and you have to go to Plan D. Again, anti-depressants can help you see what your WW is doing and not react so strongly.
Hang in there, WIC. You’re in a bad place there, but others have been where you are and come out sane and whole on the other side. No one can promise you your marriage will survive, but we can tell you you’ll get through this and the world will be right again, one way or the other.
