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All,
I have a session w/Steve next wed.
Yipee! Til then will try to remain the Plan A goddess.
I am interested to see if Drac is home tonight. He asked me Tues about this weekend. Last weekend with me having them due to his illness he mentioned spliting it up. He said he is going to a ballgame Fri night with a guy friend but other than that he has no plans
Am going to try to think of something we can all do together. Pool or amusement park is on the list.
G8 -
Again, I am so sorry for your pain. However it is BEST that WH is home! Really!
I will try to find your thread and post to you there. Is it on GQII?
BS (me) ExWS -Drac DD 9 DSS 15 D Day 11/06 Divorced 10/01/07
"You Can't Fix Stupid" - My Mom
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Go to lake as family???
tell him you'd love to go out on "his" boat....
Its a property you own right? not a rental...
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tell him you'd love to go out on "his" boat....
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Lexxx
HIS boat, BWAAHAA!
Great idea, though. No, we don't own the property at the lake. But, I may suggest a day trip! Or even an overnighter! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />
BS (me) ExWS -Drac DD 9 DSS 15 D Day 11/06 Divorced 10/01/07
"You Can't Fix Stupid" - My Mom
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Bugs:
I like the "Our Boat" idea.
WH checking up on you.... WH's!?! Can't have you DOING the SAME thing!
But still. Wednesday nights, be a little more unavailable. Turn the phone off.
But let him know that you can pick him up at FIL's later for "dessert"
Try to get him into the FAMILY home more, Ok?
Wow, your giing advice to others now! You are the Plan A Goddess NOW! LG
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I am either going to have to do the OUR boat invite over the phone or email if I can't figure out an excuse to go by FIL's house tonight as I won't see Drac otherwise.
That is IF he even goes home tonight.
I found a lake we have never been to before that is just over an hour away. Found a motel, too.
So, do I call him now? Wait til he calls tonight? Email?
LG--yea, giving advice, but feel like I should issue a disclaimer FIRST! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />.
BS (me) ExWS -Drac DD 9 DSS 15 D Day 11/06 Divorced 10/01/07
"You Can't Fix Stupid" - My Mom
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Yep, I agree with LG...time to be a little more unavailable, make him want you, then, slip quietly into plan B! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/wink.gif" alt="" />
A loving heart is the beginning of all knowledge. Thomas Carlyle
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Rin:
I didn't say anything about Plan B yet.....
But invite him to the boat.
Either with DSS and DD or ....Just Him. But it may be to early for that.
Really.
Keep those things in safe areas. Your House, or FIL's. And I know the kids are around, so you could also use the Car, His office, your Office... I'm sorry. Keep it safe.
However, My point is that he is making moves back to you, do not overplay your hand. You have been doing great. Bad Drac seems to be in the background. You are available, you are fun, you are interested in him, and you are being upfront with him.
TM to Drac: You were wondering about the w/e? I was wondering if you wanted to take the kids, boat, dogs, to lake wobegone?
What do you think about that?
LG
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I'm not following you LG...keep what "safe"??
Bugs: I think a family boating trip would be great fun. Another super Plan A memory.
How long til B-day? Did you mention the 23rd? 16 days and counting....
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So happy to hear about the Steve Harley appt.!!!
IMO, it's a good idea for you to remain HIGHLY AVAILABLE..but let HIM make the MOVES..the decisions about WHAT, WHEN and WHERE....that way HE'S THE MAN..ADMIRATION...you aren't taking charge of this...I get the sense that he's LIKING being the CASANOVA..let him THINK that he is FALLING for YOU ON HIS OWN...plus, you don't want to appear CLINGY or NEEDY..you want to appear to be the CONFIDENT, GODDESS that you are and should be..make a clear distinction between yourself as HIS WIFE and THE HO...
I like the idea of getting him into THE HOUSE...fix his FAVORITE MEAL...ask him to DO SOMETHING FOR YOU AROUND THE HOUSE...
You will be/ are already such an INSPIRATION HERE...a true testimony of a LOVING WIFE....trying to SAVE HER FAMILY...
I made it happen..a joyful life..filled with peace, contentment, happiness and fabulocity.
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Lex:
She has been sharing "dessert" with Drac. A proposal from Bugs to have Drac spend the night away with her may be accepted by Drac right, now, but could be repelling to him. He could also interpet to mean that Bugs has forgivin him for everything...DO NOT want to send that message....
Just my sense of it. She can meet the SF need as she has recently, on Drac's terms. (therefore the other area's listed... and I should have put one of those "embarrassed" emoticons there...)
OK?
LG
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LG,
I thought that Plan B was in the works in a few weeks? I guess I was reading into the end result...sorry?
Did you do away with that Bugs???????
I mean I know that you are doing an awesome plan A, but I thought that you had decided to move in with your mom?
A loving heart is the beginning of all knowledge. Thomas Carlyle
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Wow! I leave for a haircut and miss a lot!
I need to re-read it all but wanted to jump on real quick that I have pit Plan B on hold right for this minute.
A told me that I have to have Drac's permission to move. I do not want to tip my hand just yet by notifying him of the move.
I was still pondering things on when to still do Plan B and have decided to talk to Steve first
Will ck back later!
BS (me) ExWS -Drac DD 9 DSS 15 D Day 11/06 Divorced 10/01/07
"You Can't Fix Stupid" - My Mom
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Yep...I think you need to do the BASICS until you talk to Stve.
I made it happen..a joyful life..filled with peace, contentment, happiness and fabulocity.
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Well I sent Drac a tm asking to have a lake day.
He just called and talked to the kids
We talked about his work day. He then says 'I have to work Sat. I was supposed to work last Sat but since I was sick I am working this Sat'
I kept light and cheery 'oh darn! That's too bad! I didn't realize you'd have to work. No biggie, we'll just do something else'
Drac -'well I was wanting to split this weekend since I did't really get to see the kids last weekend'
Bugs 'well, do you want to do a lake day Sun?'
Drac 'not really.'
Bugs - ok.
Drac 'well, I will be over there. I want to mow the grass and do some things there.'
Bugs -'that would be great!'
We went on to talk about the mower being fixed and how he needs to bring it back over here.
I kept it light, no disappointment in my voice. I told him I'd return the movies he let me borrow to the video store tonight.
That was about it.
He did sound a little sorry about having to work Sat. Maybe it was relief he had an excuse?
Either way, I am going to play it cool tonight and tomorrow. I will take the kids somewhere fun on Sat.
Next Fri I am taking off 1/2 a day of work. Am meeting my girlfriends at a winery for the afternoon, then we are staying at a bed and breakfast for the night.
I am going to tell Drac what he told me once --I am taking a road trip! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />
BS (me) ExWS -Drac DD 9 DSS 15 D Day 11/06 Divorced 10/01/07
"You Can't Fix Stupid" - My Mom
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WOOHOO ROAD TRIP! I ahd one this weekend but I cancelled earlier in the week and I'm not so happy about it, plus I have a meeting to go to Sat.
I think I need a get away...even if I locked myself up in a room in someone else's house and slept the entire time! I daydream to much I think...of how I would like things to be...LMAO...
It would be so great to have someone take care of me for just a few hours...maybe a day...
I think that you and Drac are doing well...and you are getting the best advice...I must have missed the hold on Plan B...that's cool...I think Dr. H will help you plenty right now! I look forwad to hearing about it! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> Take care Bugs!
A loving heart is the beginning of all knowledge. Thomas Carlyle
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LG - you should have used the embarassed face! I 'got' what you were saying! LOL!
I agreed on the overnight invite. Right now that would be like garlic to Drac.
He needs to be a bit more of the Agressor right now,,with me just making it knows that his advances are welcome. Laying out some offers of family time or 'dessert' every now and then.
Mimi- I just saw your comment about me being an inspiration around here! OMG! You nade me cry! That was so sweet.
Thank you ALL for your kind words, advise, and support! I could't have done any of this w/o you all to help me!
I sent Drac an email this am (no tm last night). I had an email from Borders Books and told him the new Harry Potter book will be out 7/21
We were just talking about it the other night. I bought DSS the first book and the audio tape when he was struggling w/reading. It really helped him and then the whole family was hooked on the books, including Drac
I told him about the book and said hope you are having a great morning
DD confirmed last night that Drac is going to the ballgame tonite w/his guy friend. I heard her telling DSS. Believe me, she would know as that girl misses Nothing!
Gotta run to a meeting.
Later!
BS (me) ExWS -Drac DD 9 DSS 15 D Day 11/06 Divorced 10/01/07
"You Can't Fix Stupid" - My Mom
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Bugs:
Morning!
Looking forward to the HP novel as well....
LG
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Morning!
I just remembered - last night Drac mentioned his friend wanting him to buy into his business again.
Seems a company is for sale that he wants Drac to buy and then merge the 2 companies together. It is at a good price, supposedly
Bugs says 'oh really?'
Drac'yes but I am just not sure about trusting F to run the whole thing, as I am not quitting my job'
Bugs'trusting him how?'
Drac'just that the biz is so new that merging the 2-if it goes bad, which company is the 'bad' one'
Bugs 'well you are so hands on. You run a business like it needs to be and would need to be very involved. You would do whatever it takes to make it a success, but there are only so many hours in a day'
Drac-' Plus, I told F that I just can't do it right now'
Bug 'hmm'
Atleast I did't get the 'I can't do this til we have settled. Let's hurry up and settle' speach!
BS (me) ExWS -Drac DD 9 DSS 15 D Day 11/06 Divorced 10/01/07
"You Can't Fix Stupid" - My Mom
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It really sounds like Drac's has had a good head on his shoulders! What happened?
It's amazing the [email]cr@ppy[/email] choices they make!
:::Sighing:::
A loving heart is the beginning of all knowledge. Thomas Carlyle
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