Ya know, after you run it by Steve, wouldn't this weekend "Father's Day" be the perfect opportunity to lay it all out there?

Bugs:

Hadn't thought about "Fathers Day" but it certainly works to being a day for you to lay it out there some what.

But, you get to talk to Steve Tommorrow!

Ask him!

LG

PM -

Great idea! Really Great I think.

I just don't know about waiting until then with the custody mediation being the very next day?

I am thinking he may need more time to process the possibility. AND I do not want him to think it is some kind of ploy that has to do with the custody thing.

??????

I just bought him a Father's Day card yesterday. It says to My Husband, and outlines many of his admirable qualities as a father and a husband.

He will have the kids all weekend. Perhaps I will plan a dinner?

I bought a gift already for the kids to give him. I have been pondering what to give him from me.

Open for ideas!

Any other thoughts on the timing? I will certainly be discussing w/Steve but appreciate any input.

LG...today is MONDAY..her session is on WEDNESDAY...
<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Most important ABOUT THE GIFT..make it something that you heard him say that HE wanted...not necessarily what YOU think HE should have..but I guess you know this...I'M JUST LEARNING this kind of stuff..

Oh LG! I think you want me to have my session Almost as much as you do!



LOL!

Thanks for the reminder!

Mimi:

Isn't it Tuesday? ! ? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/confused.gif" alt="" />

I'm blinded in the presence of GODDESS'ES! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/cool.gif" alt="" />

LG

I had called Drac earlier and left vm.

He called back after his meeting. I was telling him about traffic school this weekend. We finish talking about that and he says

"We have a meeting the month w/the guardian ad litem or something, don't we?"

I replied , 'we have a custody mediation next Monday'

I just did not know what to say! I felt so trapped and stupid! I did not want to offer the come home line over the phone, so I froze up

He said he did not get the notice, that he just knew from a convo. W/his lawyer. The court mailed his notice to his dad's, but they do not get mail there.

So, I moved on in the conversation keeping light and breezy,, while I was dying inside.

Ok--how SHOULD I have responded

AND

How do I recover here?

Take away my crown. Did not earn it today! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/frown.gif" alt="" />

Doesn't sound too bad Bugs. I'm not even sure if it was a missed oppertunity. Doesn't sound like he was exactly counting the seconds until the mediation. Just staying light and breezy while dying inside is pretty impressive.

So don't beat yourself up. Try to relax until you talk to Steve. You're paying him good money, let him take some of the pressure so you can breathe.

Hold on to your crown Bugs, you're still the reigning champ.

You're still doing fine.

Thx BC!

Perhaps it wasn't all that bad, it just 'felt' bad.

Now for an added dilemma that I need help with.

A postcard arrived from daytona, addressed to Drac.

It says Drac, & kids (the kids part was obviously added after being first addressed to just Drac),

'Hey, just wanted to say Hi, and send a little something from our vacation. We'll talk to you all later.

LOVE, All (underlined)

Sent June 5th

Now, are we all in agreement that there is a 99% chance this is from the Ho?

I am so FURIOUS right now! How DARE she send this to MY home!

So, what do I do?

Here are some options

1. Give to drac and say nothing

2. Give to Drac and tell him I do not appreciate it

3. Do NOT give it to Drac at all

4. Send it back to her house in an unmarked envelope

5. Send it back to her house w/a note telling her it was unwanted

6. Any suggestions?

Someone Please chime in. I am sitting here biting nails. The steel kind, not the ones on my fingers!

Never mention it to anyone.

She'll get hers.....

That was my initial reaction, too!

Thx

Those OW think they are so clever.

Affair is rocky/over.
She wants him back. Best way to make that happen is for you to blow it. So send a friendly little postcard YOUR way....so that you will rip Drac a new one.

Instantly she looks sweet and innocent.

"what? I sent it to the wrong address? Oh my! I'm so sorry Drac...is your WIFE angry?...Oh poor Drac, she yelled at you? she is so mean to you!...."

DON'T PLAY HER GAME!

Ah Lexxx!

It is as if you were reading my mind when I first saw it!

I wasn't mad at Drac other than he put me in this sitch to begin with.

The postcard is Totally an attempted manipulation on her part.

She obviously is DESPERATE and thinks I am stupid. Poor Ho! She obviously has no clue who she is dealing with!

She is up against New Bugs, Drac's Wife, MB plans, and my MB a$$ kickin family!

I ALMOST feel sorry for her!

High Five!

Thx BC!

Drac said earlier he'd call to say goodnight to DD, he was working late .& FIL picked up DSS

I sent leftovers w/ fIL. He made sure to ask me if Drac was "seeing someone else as he did not come home the other night". Bless FIL!

I told him about Drac staying at his friend's house after working together.

So, Drac calls to say goodnight to DD. AND he calls from his OFFICE phone so that the caller I'd shows he is still at work. He NEVER did this before when he was w/the HO. He ALWAYS called from his cell, no matter what the time

When we spoke, it came up that he needs new office furniture. If you lean on his desk the wrong way it collapses

So, I ask if that means I can't do him on his desk. He says that he tried that w/me before and I said no.

I told him that was before,, now he is the boss & can turn off all of tje security cameras! He said at the same time that the cameras don't work. And then he ended the call very quickly

Said he would call DD in the am.

The Goddess powers continue to entice and yet frighten Drac!

Right??

Keep it up, Bugs!

Agree, by the way, that the postcard should be shredded and forgotten.

Oh Bugs you are so smooth in your comebacks.

It has to be driving him nuts.

Drac:

You mentioned the custody mediation meeting yesterday. You know that I don't want this M to break up. I believe that we can still work this out for the future. So when you mentioned it, I really didn't know how to respond. I have dreaded this meeting for weeks. You also didn't sound so sure about this meeting as well. I would like to ask if we could ride over together to the meeting. If we have to talk to the mediator about how the kids are going to spending thier time with US, we should at least talk about it together. We could cancel/delay the meeting as well, but that is too much to hope for now. I believe that you will make the best choice regarding this. I have the rest of the afternoon off, and your Dad will have the kids after school. (Note: set it up!)

You will have the kids all Father's day weekend. You excel as a Father, and Monday does not need to be the day we start carving up this time together as a family even further. Because of the choices we will be required to make on Monday, we begin to make permanant some of the arrangements that in the past have been rather flexible. I've been working with this flexibility, and it has really allowed you to concentrate on your new position and demanding work schedule. I just feel that once the arrangements are made "offical" by the mediator, that WE will lose tha ability to work things out together.

Love you!

Bugs

PS: We can even look for more sturdy Furniture for your office Monday afternoon....


Bugs:

Why this?

Because. The confluence is coming together. Reword it somewhat to make sure it's a little more lite and breezy, but what's the main point?

WE can WORK on This.

WE CAN Turn it around.

WE CAN be a family again.

WE DO NOT have to make these choices...

Run it by Steve tommorrow (right?)...

LG

Bugs:

I have one question for you which may answer your quetion.

Would God want you to win your husband back through deceipt?

Not giving him what was addressed to him would be deceipt, and it could come back in the long run to make him angry (one of the love busters to avoid). I would suggest giving it to him in private and saying something like...

" Honey, I have something for you that came in the mail. It made me feel ( ) about receiving it. I thought about not giving it to you, but I love and respect you enough to not keep it from you. "


Of course that's just my opinion, since I am still working on getting mine back....

INAH:

About this:

"Would God want you to win your husband back through deceipt?" (deceit?)

Because you don't give him a postcard from his GF?!?

You might want a hug but I'll deliver a 2x4!

HE MOVED OUT. If I was Bugs, I would have forwarded all his mail after two weeks. Not Bug's problem that FIL's house has delivery issues...

And if he didn't like THAT, he can MOVE back HOME.

Forwarding messages, packages, emails, voicemails, flowers, gifts, from the OP to your wayward spouse to facilitate the furthurance of thier Affair is got to be more troubling to God than shredding that kind of stuff.

Now, if the info puts the OP in a bad light to the wayward spouse, then the BS can make a choice, send or not to send.

But unwanted junk mail recieved at your home? It is YOUR decision to throw it away....

What's the sound that the shredder makes?

Now,INAH, before you think I am really pounding your here? I would have LOVED to get something like that about 3 weeks after Dday, when my A effectively ended.

Why?

Because OW still cared! I still had a shot!

Not the message that Drac needs to get right now.....

Understand?

LG