Rind,

I will take it slow....I don't want to get back to the dark place I was even earlier this week. And I'm going to do my best not to go there this weekend. As you know weekends are tough.

I'm proud of me too <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

It means alot coming from you because I really look up to you and you ahve been so helpful to me.

Still

Winter Storm Wanrning?

We're wearing shorts and sweating down here.

Rin,

Out of town crawfish warning!

The further from Houma you get, the less amount of salt is used when boiling crawfish and the more stuff they sprinkle on top which just makes your fingers and lips burn. Also, in some other parts of the state nobody puts smoked sausage in the pot. Dirty SOB's. I even have a friend in Duson that steams his, that should be illegal.

Be careful, Proceed with caution.

Glad that things seem to be looking up for you - you deserve it.

Have a happy weekend - enjoy the soirée <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

BC,

Go ahead and rub it in.... yes in northern new england we can have snow into April. I even remember snow in May.

Gotta love our 4 seasons.... winter and mud season being the 2 biggest.

Although I wouldn't trade it in at this point.

Have you ever been up North? It really is pretty up here?

Still

My WW was born in NH and most of her family is scattered through CT and NH. I'v been to NH more recently on the coast. Her family is in seabrook and north hampton. Last time we went we took the cruise to the Isle of Shoals. That was awsome, I even convinced the boat Cpt to let me drive. Cajuns have a thing for boats. My PawPaw was a shrimper. I've only been there in the summer though. I freaked out at first because nobody had A/C, but it was in the 40's at night in August while we were there.

Sorry for the threadjack Rin

Still- My heart swelled and I got as lump in my throat from the thought that YOU (good thing) look up to ME! Thank you!

BC- I'm starting to wonder about your basket of marbles...LMAO...Thanks for the warning...it's a trip to BR...and I agree with you about the burning lips and stuff! LMAO <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

LOL...I think it should be illegal not to boil mushrooms when boiling crawfish! ANd sometimes carrots! LMAO <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

E-Thank E! I sincerely hope that things turn around for YOU! I found that I was trying to force a solution at one point...thinking that my will was God's will...have to remember to pray to do HIS will...

Remember back in Oct. when I thought I saw signs that I needed to stay in my M, that was listening to OP and wishing b/c I WANTED it so bad...

I'm not saying anything about your sitch, just sharing my thoughts...You have been so good to me...a good friend! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Ah Seabrook... I remember emergancy plans when they had the nuclear plant there.

I grew up in Mass and now live in Maine. You're right about the weather up here in spring we start undressing when it hits 40's... that's a heat wave.

Yes Rind sorry for the TJ.

And you are my hero....

Still

I never said I had all of my marbles. Who in South Louisiana does?

LMAO...Oh, you are a handful BC!

No TJs here...just friends coming together! My POV, anyway!

I'm jealous of the traveling...I haven't been any further than OK...for national championship for powerlifting!

Hold on...I have to brag...I took 5th in my weighclass SOOOO long ago...(94')...eck... <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

I've also been to TX, AL, MS, and FL...oh AR! I would love to travel...

No AC! WOW! I would love that! Oh, And a roaring fire in the winter...I'm a firebug, love to watch the flames dance...so soothing!

STBX made me a firepit, I guess you can call it...I loved to go outside and build a fire...would sit outside (when we actually had cold weather) and drink some coffee, watch the fire for hours, usually after the kids were in bed...so peaceful!
<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Rind,

If you ever feel like traveling up this way it is beautiful. My favorite season is the fall.

I think thats why I got married in the fall... the color change of the leaves is breathtaking.

Maine is great we have mountains, lakes and the rocky coasts of the ocean.
Although ocean doesn't ever get warm... 68 degrees is warm in August : shocked:

You get use to the water temp when you feet go numb.
WH and I have trevaled quuite a bit and I just loved warm ocean water. Although it is so much saltier than our water.

You guys talk about crawfish... have you eva had a Maine lobsta!!! That's my Maine accent coming out.

Still

I've eaten lobster before but it probably wasn't cooked right...LOL...kinda tough...

STBX would talk about bring me places like Washington DC...his aunt worked up there but we never got up there and then his aunt retired and moved back home...

Tons of broken promises...we did go to Mexico once...drove there straight...hotel was horrible...walked across the border...had a great time...I tried goat for the first time...it was good! That was the Christmas after F was born...MIL and FIL kept him...

We did have some good times together...and I will hold the memories dear to my heart still knowing that it's not longer good for ME...and I will share those with my boys...

Like I've said their Father is NOT a bad person, he has just made some really poor choices in SO many areas of his life...then again, so have I...

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Rin,

Glad you changed your perspective.

Rather live alone then in an M of 3 makes sense to me.

I know it is tough but can I say one thing.

We know your H lives in his own world.

Try to make this as easy as possible.

Geez,

Sorry unclear.

When I say that I mean as easy as possible on yourself and your kids.

Let the lawyers do their jobs.

You probably don't need to bring anythign to his attention or his parents any more.

Just go about living your life.

I've had lobsta. The first time I ate them they weren't very big so I ate them like crawfish. I ripped the head off, pinched the tail and pulled out the entire hunk of meat. Everybody was looking at me cross eyed. I was like
What? That's not how you eat'em. Then I was properly trained which I have now forgotten. Same thing though, I don't think I've had them properly prepared yet. I did have some good fried clam though and also some Chowda.

I can dig it

HI, Frog!

LOL...I will...even if it cost me more, I believ the less I deal with him the better off I WILL BE!

And thanks for calling that to my attention, the fact that I don't have to call anything to his parents attention...

I guess that as long as it doesn't involve the kids then I don't need to deal with them either...like F's getting his report card this Wed.

I thought about faxing it to MIL, and I thought what about STBX...well, she can tell him...or I can make a copy and have F give it to him the next time he sees him...

Oh, Frog...F gave me his test papers to sign this morning...his grades are doing good! Several A+'s, a few b's and I think one or two c's...

I told him how proud I was of him and to keep up the good work...said that I would have to think about a reward for doing so well!

It made me feel so great when i saw them! I was worried about his grades falling! Conduct was even good! My boss and a few others seem to think that F is scared of his dad too but he hasn't said anything to me about it.

BC- I agree about the clams and chowda!

BC,

That's why during the summer the seafood restaurants have place mats with proper instructions on how to eat a lobsta along with bibs.

It's funny I'm not much of a lobster eater... I just like sucking on the legs for juice. Too much work for my food. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Rin,

just got back from the book store the didn't have TVAR in stock so I ordered it. I did buy The Verbally Abusive Man, Can He Change by the same author. I'll
let you know how that is.

Still

Still- Cool I look forward to hearing about it.

Well, ladies and gents...

The cell phone company called me at lunch looking for STBX...about the bill, I said that I was his W and she asked if I could talk about the account...

I said that I would rather not and gave her his number...

Sticking to my guns about not paying the cell bill! BESIDES all the pressure that I've been under with the bills, he can handle it now! Let them call HIM!

I opened my savings account at lunch to...that makes me really happy!!!

I think I will not go on this out of town trip...conserve on my resources...I was thinking about doing a little something for me this weekend...maybe pick up a shirt or two but I think I will wait on that...

just in case, the price I was quoted happens to be a little more! They may find something that I didn't know about...

Oh, and my mom TMed, she's putting a package in the mail for me and the kids...their Easter stuff...and she said there was an env. with sumtin it in...

Owe...Surprises...I like these kind of surprises...LOL...Good ones! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

The world is coming together and it feels great! I'm just excited about life! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/shocked.gif" alt="" />

Also, I need to check into the private IC that my A said I needed to do.

I was reading about recovery from VA and it was saying that you may have flashs and I DO! Now that I know what was going on all of a sudden something will pop into my mind. And the dreams I had last night, I can't remember what they were about but I remember making myself wake up. So, i think an IC is in order.

CJ, if you're still around, can you give me some insight!

I'm going to fix my picker come heck or high water! LMAO

BC- Watch out Still is fisty today! LMAO <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

HI, everyone! I just laid the kids down for the night! I had a good weekend!

Come to find out MIL and FIL came to town this weekend...and the kids spent what sounds like a largfe part of the weekend at the neighbors...

OMG, when I picked up the kids, STBX was looking Hot, under the collar that is...I just overlooked it, only spoke about the kids, told him to let me know when he wanted them this week, confirmed that this coming weekend was mine and the next weekend was his...

We got home and it suddenly occured to me why STBX was mad, okay could have been mad, when FIL called me and asked about the sexual abuse, I told him about doing things that I really didn't want to do which included OP being involved...FIL is a fixer, he would have mentioned this too STBX...I had told FIL that everything was fine on the surface but underneath it wasn't...

I didn't ask any questions of the kids except when the last time that they had a bath, F offered information, so we had a casual conversation...they didn't bathe since Thurs. night, played outside all weekend...guess they didn't need one...

ANyway, F said that STBX told F that he didn't like the sitch but there was nothing he could do about it. LOL, got to love that one...no, in my eyes there is nothing now that he can do about it...

THe kids were fine tonight, laughing and in good spirits, well, L was upset because he didn't have time to play the gameboy but they were fine. That's what matters to me...

Yesterday, I went to the book store and I was looking for a kids book on D, but didn't see one, I did however find one on the blame game with the Bernstein Bears...So, after their bath, I read to them and their in bed.

I went to the bookstore and went shopping, got some new clothes, DIRT cheap, I was so happy...LOL...I got dressed this morning and told my Sponsor "STBX eat your heart out, this is what you gave up!" She siad to keep up that attitude...Funny how some new clothes can do that to you! LOL

Today, I went to the Home and Garden show, visited some people that I grew up next too, like another set of grandparents...thay are really special to me...went to DCare, and my Al-anon meeting!

I just tried to stay as busy as possible...now Friday night wasn't as good for me...I made a phone call to one of "OUR" frineds and they were telling me that I just needed to talk to STBX that he doesn't know why, blah, blah, blah...

I let myself get upset...it was sad...I was todl that STBX and I had small problems but nothing major...LOL...I was so hurt...so, I decided that I'm just going to have to start fresh, make all new friends, and go from there...

Oh, Friday night was horrible for me, luckily another friend...the one OW wanted to go home with, STBX BF, well, not really BF now...and he talked to me, telling me that it didn't matter what OP said, blah, blah,blah....

It was good to talk to him, he's always been a good friend, I can't see him any other way...LOL...I know TOO much about him...LOL

Great supporter though! He was telling me a little bit about STBX childhood...so sad...said MIL was probably just as scared as I was when I left...and I told him that STBX wouldn't let MIL talk about it around me...he would cut her off and tell her to stop...

I finished reading TVAR, WOW, explained it all, even the last part about MIL...how they don't change b/c there's nothing wrong with them...awesome book...

Well, thank you for letting me share my weekend...

Hey Rind,

You sound so strong, even after having a rough Friday night.

It also sounds like your kids are adjusting which is good.

Other then that not much to say but glad for the update.

Still

Hey, glad your weekend got better.

What do you think of DCare? Was it your first session? Was it the first session of the series or did you come into the middle of it?

I've been going about 10 weeks now. It's been really good, but I get more from the video than I do from some of the discussions because, except for one other lady dealing with a WH, everyone else is D'ed.

Hope you have a great week.