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Just wanted to drop in and say Howdy. Seems like you have your good days and bad. You've had to deal with a lot over the last few months (not to mention YEARS), so give yourself a break.
PWC was always fiscally responsible. He paid CS from day one, on time every time. He picked up and dropped off as we had decided. Most of our separations went smoothly. In MD, you have to be separated for a year in order to D, also, so I get what you are going through. During separation, we sold nothing, had no NEW loans together, no one gained from any sales of property, etc. I was also the one living in the house, so that made it tougher for those things to be done by PWC. Again, he was a responsible person, just a lowsy spouse, at the time.
Me-BS-38 Married 1997; son, 8yo Divorced April 2009
Wow, what a lucky one you are! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />
It's been difficult, but I can say that after having spoke with my lawyer's office I feel much better...
After informing the para that I still haven't gotten CS this month...she said Boy, he sure is screwing this up...or something to that effect...basically, POWS will lose...
Plain and simply...
Good for me and the boys...I still can't imagine living at home, just me and the kids...I guess until we move back in I'm not going to be able to do that!
Thank you for stopping by...I read your thread from time to time but I don't have anything to say...we are in such different places and that's great as far as I'm concerned...
I pray that you and PWC stay on the up and up! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />
A loving heart is the beginning of all knowledge. Thomas Carlyle
You really crack me up that you let him suprise you.
You know my dad was not the best father in the world. So now I joke becuase most people think I am a pretty good dad.
I say parenting is easy, I just think to myself, what would my dad do? Then I do the opposite.
POWS seems to have the same type of thinking, what's the smart thing to do? Then he does the opposite.
Rin maybe you need to look at this from another angle.
You keep praying for a sooner court date. However each day that goes by POWS is making mistakes that help you!!!!
The more time that passes the more rope he is getting to hang himself with. He is really obliging you too.
So in the end the fact that it has taken this long has helped.
So in the long run if it takes a little longer it only helps you.
Think of it this way, imagine this question.
Your A- So POS you have decided to let your STBXW live with your 2 kids in a single room in someones house. POWS - Yes but she didn't have to leave we could have stayed married. Your A- Well yes that is true but your STBXW made it clear that reconciliation was not an option, isn't that correct. POWS- Well yes but she could have come back. Your A - Sir this is a custody hearing not a D proceeding so again answer the question, which is as a father you stayed in the house that your children lived in and never once offered to leave so your STBXW and YOUR KIDS COULD MOVE BACK. POWS- No but I did tell her if I got some money I would get it to her so she could find a place after the D. I mean this place has sentimental value for me. Your A- REally you don't think it has the same for your kids? Your A- What about late CS payements, what about these bills being late, what about , what about, what about.
Your A- Do you really beleive it is in the Kids best interes to live with you?
Doh
BS 38 FWW 35 D Day 10/03 Recovery started 11/06 3 boys 12, 8 and a new baby
When life hands you lemons make lemonade then try to find the person life hands vodka and have a party.
I understand where you are coming from Frog, as a MOF, you are the one that has helped me deal with this whole sitch by looking at it that way...
there's been some other positives too...
There are two reasons I'm hoping for sooner rather than later...one school's starting on the 7th and it will be easier for the three of us if we're in the house as soon as possible...we have to get up earlier and this is L's first year...this is the most important reason...
Structure for the boys in regards to school, and regilion come to think about it, b/c religion classes will be starting up again also...
the other reason is so that I can have that title in my hands...
Prehaps surprised is the wrong word...I mean i expect him to do these things, I really do...I expect him to behave in the worst way possible...so, it's really no surprise...
I actually feel that I have a good attitude with regards to viewing POWS...if I get better than I expect than it's good...let's just say that he doesn't let me down...I HAVE gotten to that point!
I'm sure that I will be sitting back in court and laughing to myself on the inside and entertaining myself at great lenghts once I'm out of court with a ruling in my favor...
MOF, I told the para this morning that I was keeping my backyard clean...she laughed and said that was good!
it's on the up and up, the only thing that can stop us now is should one of the lawyer's back out on that day! And believe me I'm preparing for that disappointment too! LMAO
A loving heart is the beginning of all knowledge. Thomas Carlyle
So, did you get a court date yet? I just continue to be astounded that the court has let this get dragged out this long for you. So much for "emergency" hearing..... You are so much more patient than I am! Glad that you're doing such a great job of hanging in there.
Hi Guys! Thanks for pulling up my thread and checking in on me...I was thinking when I got the new court date of starting a new thread since I can't change the title...
No, I haven't hear from them yet, and TBH, I'm not in arush right now...I know that there is a date and the longer that I don't hear from them the closer that it will be...make senses?
AmI, thank you for the compliment on being patience...it has not been easy...but I'm looking at it like this...which I didn't see before...It's giving me the opportunity to take care of some bills...get them out of the way so that I will not have to depend on CS when we move back into the house...
MOF, POWS told me that the house note went up about a hundred dollars, well, I checked my new credit report and the new note was on there, it's actually $132, a result of ins. costs going up...so, I can plan for that and make sure that we will be comfortable...
Frog, thank you once again for the idea...I have talked with them about the living arrangements that we presently have, but have not talked about the inconveniences that this upcoming school year and religion classes will bring...
I will note that this is creating trouble for us...just like POWS changing the locks on the house, claiming that I have his gun and he's fearful for his life...did I mention that's what he told his lawyer! LMAO...what a joke!
So, instead, of having to go to the police and the trouble of getting into the house, I've just purchased anything that we've needed...I've asked for a few things but I haven't gotten them from him...once was the kid's DVD player...the request was ignored, and that was fine, I just bought another!
Same thing with a TV...got a little 13 inch so we could snuggle in bed together and watch movies...
Life hasn't been all that bad, considering the sitch, but then again, I don't need a lot to be happy...I am not that way...there are a few things that I really enjoy like my sheets! LMAO...
But, for the most part, I've learned to make do with what I have at hand...I think that it's not what you have it's what you do with it that matters!
Yesterday, since my car was dirty, and I know that the kids were going to be looking for something to do, I asked them if they wanted to wash my car...it was really my excuse to let them play in the water...when they were finished I went out there and cleaned the car...
They had funa dn that was the point to begin with, but we don't have a pool, and it was really hot...what more does a 5 and 9 year old want...a water hose, bubbles...they were good to go...
Later that night, L and I laid in bed, and I'm teaching him to read...it was our second night reading "[censored] and Jane" series...he's doing great at remembering the works...LMAO...of course, they are: Oh, Look, Jane, See...and we read and reread...
My mom called and she's the one that got the books, so I put him on the phone and he read to her...we were all delighted! This morning, L comes to me, and says "Mom, sometimes I'm going to get bad grades!"
I kneel down and hugged him saying "Oh, you're worried about getting bad grades, It's going to be okay! You're going to do great!" What a moment for me...it was like falling in love with him all over again! What a little man he has become!
They are both so wonderful to be around! This is what life's about, and I missed out on some of these things for so long, being wrapped up with POWS...that's okay, today's a new day...and I wouldn't change where I am not today!
You are so right that they see and will continue to see...they don't ask any questions about court or anything...they have adapted well...and sometimes they talk about finding me a boyfriend...LMAO...Mom's not ready yet!
but when I am, F and Spon. are coming up with a list of questions! LMAO...They talk about this often from what I hear...
Well, i'm rambled on enough, as soon as I hear sometimes I will let you all know! i'm looking forward to it...and I think you are right Frog, about it being a dream and not wanting to disappoint myself...no since in getting my hopes up and something happening...
A loving heart is the beginning of all knowledge. Thomas Carlyle
Sounding great today! What precious times with your kiddos! Loved reading all about them!
You should shop around on the homeowner's insurance! Do not just accept an increase. Find out WHY they increased. Did POWS change the coverage? Do it now so you can make a change when you move back.
I can't believe he would not give you the kid's stuff! What an A$$
Keep the candle lit in your heart that you will return to your home when it is the right time!
BS (me) ExWS -Drac DD 9 DSS 15 D Day 11/06 Divorced 10/01/07
Hey Bugs, when I found out about the increase I called my insurance company problen is after katrina and Rita hit, insurance company are not writing new policies...
you have to take what you can get right now...the governor just passed a bill that is an incensive for insurance companies to write more policies in Louisiana...after the storms, they were pulling out like crazy!
POWs has never handled anything, i've always been the one to do that! So, it's really a matter of not having a choice, the only other insurance company I could get a policy with would be higher than the one that I have right now...
The policy I have went from $1300 to $2100 a year and at one point I WAS over insured...i would rather be safe than sorry...today, I'm right on the mark for replacement of the structure and it's contents!
As far as POWS, he always been this way...sometimes they get to brings toys home...he told them that if they didn't have anything left there not to come crying to him...
There's NO WAY they would have nothing left there...they have SOOO much...it's just his way of controlling them...I personally write it off, and they will learn to do that too!
I won't have to say a word bad about thier dad, they will see it themselves...just like my mom did with me...I'm very blessed to have learned that from her!
A loving heart is the beginning of all knowledge. Thomas Carlyle
Hey, just wanted to say thanks for keeping up with me these last few days. I know you have a lot on your plate as well, and it seems you got a new helping of something.
So keep your head up as well. There is a light at the end of this tunnel and it's NOT an oncoming train.
Divorced on 3/25/2008 but I have primary legal and physical custody of my 2 kids.
Plan A Thread Plan B Thread Ephesians 5:25 - Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her
You talkn' bout' ins...No, I knew that was coming I told POWS about it a while back...
i was prepared for it, I just didn't know how much the increase was...I'm cool, bright and shiny day!
you are welcome, I have no problem managing my time for my friends, b/c if the shoe was on the other foot, you'd do the same thing for me! You have, when I needed to talk to someone, so I'm just returning the favor!
This is part of the letter from POWS'lawyer in regards to the motorcycle...
As for as the motorcycle, my client advised that the motorcycle was sold to a HN2's H in 2006 for $1500.00. $750 of the $1500 was paid prior to Rin filing for D. The remaining $750 was tendered recently and the title was signed over to HN2's H. The motocycle was placed in the possession of HN2's H in 2006. The transaction was recently completed as our clients were obilaged.
I have the title and like I've said before the DMV has no records of a duplicate being apllied for or a transfer! I also have Tms on my cell that we talked about this on June 4th, this year @ 9:32 where he stated that if he sold it he would have to drop the price b/c it doesn't hold it's value like a Harley!
BLAHHHAHAHHAHHAHAH!!!!!
A loving heart is the beginning of all knowledge. Thomas Carlyle
Oh, Rin...it's really hard to look at a bald-faced lie in writing, isn't it? Feels to me like it insults my perception, distorts my reality. We know it's not true...heck, I tried to get you to sell your bike to fund your divorce before. You wouldn't do it!
LOL
Be calm, write down that this is untrue in its entirety. Write down the text messages for your lawyer...your bike was in your own garage in 2007, before you moved out. Ask your A if you can make this statement part of whatever they submit to the judge...even if POWS' A doesn't pursue it as the truth.
Actually, I'm just talking out of my hat. This is great proof that your POWS isn't credible and will lie to the court for his own profit.
Proof.
Well, that belief just dropped off the anger from insult I was feeling...how 'bout you?
I just found the name of the person that the bike was at up until after I left...I will be locating a phone number soon and and address! SO I have a witness, POWS' co-worker!
BLAHAHAHHAH!
A loving heart is the beginning of all knowledge. Thomas Carlyle
Sucks for the neighbor. Looks like it is small claims court for the STBX POWS.
You don't need a witness.
This will PI55 off a judge.
Him selling community property after you left trying to claim it was already sold.
Here is a little more rope for you to hang yourself. Oh you would like a little more sure.
You know when you go to court you should buy a shirt that says "I used to be with stupid" make sure you know what side of the court you will be on so the arrow points to POWS.
BS 38 FWW 35 D Day 10/03 Recovery started 11/06 3 boys 12, 8 and a new baby
When life hands you lemons make lemonade then try to find the person life hands vodka and have a party.
BW me 46 WH 46 Together 28 years married 23 3 Kids DD20, DD17 and DS 14 DD #1 (1st A) 10/13/01 with single OW who was co-worker DD#2 1/23/02 phone call from OW WH left job 4/02 MC 10/01 to 4/02 (when he showed up) Separated 7/04 to 10/04 Retrouvaille 9/04 Red Flags 11/05 DD#1 (2nd affair) 8/16/06 with MOW age 29 twice married and he's her boss. Moved out (him) weekend after labor day 23rd anniversary 10/7/07 Filed 10/18/06 still seeing MOW Dropped divorce complaint 6/7/07
K, I called a few people to help me calm down...I'm just going to call my lawyer in the morning and ask if I can come pick up everything that I have turned into them...
I'm calmer now...
That's a lot of crap to gather...just reading it will make your brain want to explode!
I've done some of it tonight and I'm going to leave the rest along...I'm just getting around to eating and I have to take a shower...
I'm just happy to be online tonight! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />
Okay, deep breathe...there you go Still, Thank YOU! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />
A loving heart is the beginning of all knowledge. Thomas Carlyle