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Joined: May 2006
Posts: 982
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Joined: May 2006
Posts: 982 |
I can't stop thinking about that voice mail you say he left you. Is this a common thing for him to do? Is he used to being able to say these kinds of things to you if you do not behave as he expects you to behave?
If this is the case, there are some very unhealthy boundary issues and control issues in your Marriage that you need to work on.
I am not saying you should file a police report--that is a decision you have to make. But look at it this way: You are in a point in your relationship where your sensai and others are talking about a police report and police protection. This is not healthy. This set of interactions and expectations needs to change pronto. Am I making any sense to you? I hope others chime in here as I am not the most experienced person on this site. But I am concerned.
Lake
Lake
BW-53
FWH-54
H had EA 3 weeks 06
Married 1977
N C 4-10-06
3 DSs
In Recovery
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Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 80
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Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 80 |
No the voice mail is not common. I went to the police on Saturday as my Sensei recommended and again on Sunday to let them hear the message. My husband comes and goes. Sleeps in the basement and says not one word to me.
Now what?
BS Me 48
WH 45
Married 7-10-04
DDay 6-1-07
DS13 (my star, his step)
3 cats (short hairy family)
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Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 80
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Joined: Apr 2007
Posts: 80 |
On one hand I really want to make this marraige work. I hear story after story of marriages that are better and stronger after stuff like this.
Cake eating sounds about right. I guess. I'm so....broken today. I can barely eat or sleep. I hate suspense. I just want this to be over one way or another.
If he decides to try to make this work he will have to be a completely open book, no secrets, and go to counseling, and church. That may be more than he can do.
I'm so sad I can't think straight.
BS Me 48
WH 45
Married 7-10-04
DDay 6-1-07
DS13 (my star, his step)
3 cats (short hairy family)
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