Oh damn - now I will be accused of ganging up and gaslighting.

But I'm just being authentic.

that is my truth after all.....

MrsW,

I wasn't being sarcastic...I looked up angst and it said great anxiety...which is what I feel when I read MEDC's posts. Not knowing if it will put another poster down or raise them up.

I understood Max's post as her own opinion. Period. I took her opinion to be that ML's post was too black and white.

No, I don't agree. I believe that men should not leave their homes. My issue was with ML's answer to Max the same as she does to me...says that I'm unclear, the one who isn't communicating.

You wanna arm wrestle?

Or mock, like BigKahuna does? Still hurts much deeper than I thought it would, after time has passed.

Guess I gotta let more go...didn't know it would be this difficult watching heroes fall so far in my opinion.

Still does. Mockery slices deeply, BigK. You know that. Was my DH's special hidden weapon...until he stopped...heard...owned. Guess I really get to you and MrsW, too, huh?

LA

LA...

How do you think that your earlier post on this thread helped at all (the one that was edited)??? I saw your post as misplaced compassion towards one here that is a KNOWN causer of dissension...one who posts vague and mysterious posts-it's pretty clear that her goal here is NOT helping, yet you defend her against others who clearly ARE here helping...My perception is that misplaced compassion is an area in which you struggle...It might be worth it for you to examine that, imo...

And I think you know very well that what you posted to MEDC WILL cause further dissension on a thread that is very important here...Why would you do that?

Mrs. W

LA, I suspected yours was a kneejerk emotional reaction based on your own history with me and was perhaps posted in retaliation. You have confirmed that suspicion. I can rarely understand a thing you say either.

MadMax never did explain her opinion and it is my opinion that it was too foggy and unclear to understand. It is not my policy to respond to something that is incomprehensible. If I want someone to understand what I am saying, it is up to me to make it clear and concise and understandable. Saying something is "too black and white" is a meaningless critique sans explanation, most especially when applied to a generalization.

I don't understand why folks would become so hysterical just because someone wants to understand their point. I suspect it is because they don't really WANT to be understood at all. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smirk.gif" alt="" />

LA, don't you think it would have made more sense for MM to simply explain her objection? Getting all hysterical about a simple request for clarity is balls up INSANE and does nothing to further discussion, ya know? If someone asks me to clarify my position, I GLADLY explain because I WANT to be understood. If I condemn someone's opinion, as she did mine, I think it is reasonable to expect that I can support my opinion. I don't think that is too much to ask, do you?

And I agree with MrsW about MEDC, LA is purposely trying to bait him.

LA honestly I used to find your insight so valuable and enlightening. It's a pity that recently you have become the high priestess of psychobabble.

My opinion of you has rapidly declined as well. Does that make us even.

Is it OK for you to diss MEDC here but cry foul when you feel mocked yourself?

you said it better than I could have BK.

wow you kids are a pack of wolves.

luckily I am wearing my breastplates of forged steel

My post was pretty well clear. It still is.

Mere Mortal-as much as I try to understand what your perceptions of my post are-eeeegaaaaddsss.

Weaver-child or children-sometimes enviroments become toxic, extremely toxic...as ignorant as it now sounds to you-sometimes it is better to leave-untill one is 'skilled up" and there is a healthy environment available for the kids.

As much as there are similarities in all of our histories-each and everyone of our situations is unique-and should be treated as such.

Because it is not all black and white.

Max

oooppsss MK for.......got to say

slap yourself...it would make me feel so much better.

Max

In other words, you can't defend you position. This is a meaningless bumper sticker.

As you are Mel.

OK lets discuss the kids.

You Mel are saying in each and every case for the BS not to leave the marital home---yeah?

What if that environment is soooo toxic? And an unskileed BS cannot deal with it--lets not forget---

What if there is such unhappiness and discord in that house/enviroment-that it has broad and damaging effects on the children?


Whats your plan?

Max

madmax, do you understand what a generalization is?

You have just described about 99% of the cases we see here. The "plan" is in my first post. MEN, [BS] do not leave your home. That is the "plan."

Mel do you?

You made a very broard statement-without knowing each and everyones uniqunes's here-as much as we maybe similar we are not, and there are vumerable people out there.

Hey I am still willing to chalk this over with Harley.

Are you?

Max

Well, of course, that is the nature of a generalization. It would be silly to assert to that one needs to know "each and everyones uniqunes's" since that is an impossible standard. Using that standard all standards and principles would be invalid. I assert it is not wise to play Russian Roulette and I don't know "each and everyones uniqunes's." One doesn't need to know each and everyone's case in order to make a generalization.

That is why I wondered if you knew what one was and it appears you don't. A generalization is based on the rule, not the exception. It is understood there will be exceptions, but you don't dismiss a generalization based on an exception. That is what you did, even though you failed to even produce a valid exception or even support your own dismissal.


Willingness does not equal ability, though.

Ahhhh I get it- now you were making a generalisation?-DUH
Don't you think that's a bit unfair...especailly making me your punching bag...for your generalisations?

I think uniquness should be embraced-and dealt with uniquely

And vunerability simply-

Not generalised.

Max

You don't understand that a principle is based on generalization [as is inductive reasoning] and you tell me "DUH?" YIKES! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/crazy.gif" alt="" />

I agree, a BS should not leave the home. Ever.

They should either continue living with the WS, or toss their sorry [censored] outside.

If anyone's leaving, it should be the WS.

agreed....absent an abusive situation.