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Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 6,128
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Posts: 6,128 |
It looks to me like HR has left you an invitation to call them and see what decision they made. It can do no harm to make that call. Just don't be emotional. Say as little as possible. Let them sweat if they are going to. But certainly call. You never know. They may have decided to fire them after they get back from their trips. A previous company of mine did that on occasion - waited till the guy got back. Never interfere with business.
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Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 232
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Posts: 232 |
How did the session with Jennifer go?
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Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 111
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Posts: 111 |
It went fine. I got some constructive advice for the next week or two.
WW was pleasant and talkative last night. We spoke on the phone a few times today and everything went well. I'm pretty sure I can maintain my composure and avoid lashing out.
WW expressed some interest in being on the MC call next time. That won't be for two weeks though. Anything could happen between now and then.
Trying to get by.
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Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 232
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Posts: 232 |
Did you decide to stay home or stay with a friend?
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Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 111
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Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 111 |
Trying to get by.
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Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 232
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Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 232 |
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Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 111
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Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 111 |
Trying to get by.
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Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 27,069
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I doubt very much that he will come. Husbands usually stay with their families.
Have you seen an attorney about protecting yourself and children financially? You can do that without filing for a divorce.
How was she as a wife and mother before the affair?
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Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 111
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Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 111 |
Trying to get by.
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Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 111
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Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 111 |
Trying to get by.
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Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 111
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Joined: Jun 2007
Posts: 111 |
Trying to get by.
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Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 6,128
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Posts: 6,128 |
Avoid conflict. There is no benefit in arguing because she isn't rational. Be very cold and calm in any response. Just let it all bounce off you.
I'm guessing that they have a pretty tight balance sheet worked out for financing this new life of theirs. You aren't playing along. OM will get hit for CS and possibly alimony. Having to sell a house in a quick sale usually is not profitable because buyers always know it is a divorce sale so you are highly motivated to sell.
She can't pay CS and have OM pay CS.
You said she was a good mother. I'm going to challenge that based on some of your earlier posts. She seemed to ignore the kids quite a lot.
If she tries to negotiate anything, just reply that you will leave it to the lawyers. At this point it's just a business deal.
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Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 6,128
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I think it's time to show her you have let her go.
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Joined: Jun 2007
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I think it's time to show her you have let her go. Agreed.
Trying to get by.
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Joined: Jan 2006
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Joined: Jan 2006
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Just remember - the opposite of love is indifference. You can't show any anger. You may be very surprised at how she responds to this.
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Joined: Jun 2007
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Post deleted by Jethro99
Last edited by Jethro99; 06/30/07 06:56 AM.
Trying to get by.
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Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 6,128
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Just tell her to have her lawyer contact your lawyer. You don't even want to discuss it.
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Joined: Jul 2006
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This is so very sad. Jethro, I'm sorry you and the kids are going through this. Folks, I'm really worried about how WW is planning on bringing the OM into the kiddies' lives.
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Joined: Jan 2006
Posts: 6,128
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Posts: 6,128 |
I think her lawyer will not allow Plan B. I think it is time for tough love. If jethro shows WW he no longer wants to be married to her, it might shake her up. WW's don't like it when the shoe is on the other foot.
Now, as far as the D goes, who is more motivated here? I think jethro plods along at his own pace. Keep WW in a panic. Jethro shouldn't agree to anything he isn't happy with. Divorces can take years!
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Joined: Dec 2006
Posts: 6,986
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Unless she owns that house outright and it's separate property, she's just throwing her money away with an appraiser. I wouldn't budge on the house or cooperate in anyway to facilitate her little plan. Are you documenting everything she does?
I'm sorry I'm not familiar with your whole thread but has divorce already been filed? I think I'd let her know in no uncertain terms that your children will NOT be around the OM. If you've already filed you can ask the court for "temporary orders" and ask that your children not be exposed to any boyfriends during the pendency of the divorce-- that it's in their best interest not to be subjected to their mom's relationship which may end up failing anyway.
Widowed 11/10/12 after 35 years of marriage
*********************
“In a sense now, I am homeless. For the home, the place of refuge, solitude, love-where my husband lived-no longer exists.” Joyce Carolyn Oates, A Widow's Story
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